The Culture Cup Round x - Adam is a naughty naughty boy

by Rowley Wed 03 Sep 2014, 2:32 pm

First topic message reminder :

Too early I think, story of my life as TSMR will testify.

by **rIck_dAgless** Mon 15 Sep 2014, 1:48 pm

Tino wrote:I try and support the village shop as much as possible, even at the ramped up prices.

Mr Dharmishra and family. Lovely people although its taken me the best part of a decade to convince them I'm not a petty thief.

It is a worry that now that borders are opening, that all the Bulgarians will be coming over and taking our Polish peoples jobs...

by **JuliusHMarx** Mon 15 Sep 2014, 1:54 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
rick_dagless wrote:
Tino wrote:Yorkshire tea as well, you'll be pleased to know.

Highly anglocentric, the Yorkshire tea farmers will be proud...

Support the local business, unles the non-local ones are cheaper/better of course...

I try and support the village shop as much as possible, even at the ramped up prices.

Mr Dharmishra and family. Lovely people although its taken me the best part of a decade to convince them I'm not a petty thief.

So you get away with it?

Always.

I'd have been more impressed if you'd put 'All my life"

by Mind the windows Tino. Mon 15 Sep 2014, 1:56 pm

JuliusHMarx wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
rick_dagless wrote:
Tino wrote:Yorkshire tea as well, you'll be pleased to know.

Highly anglocentric, the Yorkshire tea farmers will be proud...

Support the local business, unles the non-local ones are cheaper/better of course...

I try and support the village shop as much as possible, even at the ramped up prices.

Mr Dharmishra and family. Lovely people although its taken me the best part of a decade to convince them I'm not a petty thief.

So you get away with it?

Always.

I'd have been more impressed if you'd put 'All my life"

But I haven't lived here all my life so that would just be silly.

by **JuliusHMarx** Mon 15 Sep 2014, 2:07 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
rick_dagless wrote:
Tino wrote:Yorkshire tea as well, you'll be pleased to know.

Highly anglocentric, the Yorkshire tea farmers will be proud...

Support the local business, unles the non-local ones are cheaper/better of course...

I try and support the village shop as much as possible, even at the ramped up prices.

Mr Dharmishra and family. Lovely people although its taken me the best part of a decade to convince them I'm not a petty thief.

So you get away with it?

Always.

I'd have been more impressed if you'd put 'All my life"

But I haven't lived here all my life so that would just be silly.

But you've been a petty thief all your life, so it would still apply.

by Mind the windows Tino. Mon 15 Sep 2014, 2:09 pm

JuliusHMarx wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
rick_dagless wrote:
Tino wrote:Yorkshire tea as well, you'll be pleased to know.

Highly anglocentric, the Yorkshire tea farmers will be proud...

Support the local business, unles the non-local ones are cheaper/better of course...

I try and support the village shop as much as possible, even at the ramped up prices.

Mr Dharmishra and family. Lovely people although its taken me the best part of a decade to convince them I'm not a petty thief.

So you get away with it?

Always.

I'd have been more impressed if you'd put 'All my life"

But I haven't lived here all my life so that would just be silly.

But you've been a petty thief all your life, so it would still apply.

Suppose so.

by kingraf Mon 15 Sep 2014, 2:14 pm

JuliusHMarx wrote:

Actually, I often say "Bite me" my female opponents.

Unfortunate

by **superflyweight** Mon 15 Sep 2014, 2:25 pm

kingraf wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:

Actually, I often say "Bite me" my female opponents.
Unfortunate

Standards are slipping round these parts.

by kingraf Mon 15 Sep 2014, 2:46 pm

superflyweight wrote:
kingraf wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:

Actually, I often say "Bite me" my female opponents.
Unfortunate

Standards are slipping round these parts.

It's disconcerting when Kingraf has to play MC Grammar.

by kingraf Mon 15 Sep 2014, 2:53 pm

On the drive home, I caught a seemingly never ending military tailgate. With the situation in Lesotho, I think they are going to Invade Lesotho and try annex it. Would be awesome if they did... It would be like having a piece of Switzerland without needing a passport.

by Mind the windows Tino. Mon 15 Sep 2014, 2:56 pm

kingraf wrote:MC Grammar.

That's quite funny.

by kingraf Mon 15 Sep 2014, 3:06 pm

Having researched it, annexing Lesotho is a bad idea. GDP of $2bn, a third of the country has AIDS... Can't have more HIV Positive people on our tax bill.

by **superflyweight** Mon 15 Sep 2014, 3:12 pm

kingraf wrote:
superflyweight wrote:
kingraf wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:

Actually, I often say "Bite me" my female opponents.
Unfortunate

Standards are slipping round these parts.

It's disconcerting when Kingraf has to play MC Grammar.

Referring to yourself in the third person. Clear breach of Culture Cup rules. Get out! Get out, now!

by **seanmichaels** Mon 15 Sep 2014, 3:14 pm

just managed a £73 refund from the bank for a bogus complaint. quite chuffed in a petty thief kind of way.

by Mind the windows Tino. Mon 15 Sep 2014, 3:14 pm

superflyweight wrote:
kingraf wrote:
superflyweight wrote:
kingraf wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:

Actually, I often say "Bite me" my female opponents.
Unfortunate

Standards are slipping round these parts.

It's disconcerting when Kingraf has to play MC Grammar.

Referring to yourself in the third person. Clear breach of Culture Cup rules. Get out! Get out, now!

The MC Grammar bit was funny though?

by kingraf Mon 15 Sep 2014, 3:16 pm

superflyweight wrote:
kingraf wrote:
superflyweight wrote:
kingraf wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:

Actually, I often say "Bite me" my female opponents.
Unfortunate

Standards are slipping round these parts.

It's disconcerting when Kingraf has to play MC Grammar.

Referring to yourself in the third person. Clear breach of Culture Cup rules. Get out! Get out, now!

I've never heard of a rapper who doesn't speak in third person. So for purposes of the MC Grammar bit, I had to build it up.

by **JuliusHMarx** Mon 15 Sep 2014, 3:20 pm

superflyweight wrote:
kingraf wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:

Actually, I often say "Bite me" my female opponents.
Unfortunate

Standards are slipping round these parts.

Personally, I only point out genuine spelling and grammar errors. I'm not petty enough to pick up on typos. The culture cup would be a poorer place if I was/were*

* was/were - I don't know. Stupid bloody grammar.

by **seanmichaels** Mon 15 Sep 2014, 3:21 pm

I accidentally swallowed 8 scrabble pieces last night. Next time I need a crap it could spell disaster.

by kingraf Mon 15 Sep 2014, 3:24 pm

Were you "playing" around with your sort of niece?

by **seanmichaels** Mon 15 Sep 2014, 3:37 pm

by **Galted** Mon 15 Sep 2014, 5:32 pm

Has anyone got an old ESPIRIT tin they don't need? It'll complete my old biscuit tin collection so I'm willing to pay an obscene amount of money for it.

by Rowley Mon 15 Sep 2014, 5:43 pm

Evening all. The Highclere area is nearly as posh ad imagine Tina's hometown to be, and ten times as dull. There is nearly nothing here, and what little there is appears to close around half ten in the morning.

by **Galted** Mon 15 Sep 2014, 5:44 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:Dear Galts

Sorry that i was so awfully snippy-snappy with you the other day but I’ve been a right little crosspatch recently. Mummy caught me fiddling with my tummy-soldier during antiques roadshow and sean and Jeff have been quite horrid to me but their just a bunch of silly-billies. Harriet and Beatrice have been unpleasant to me to calling me all sorts of dreadfull names but their just horrible beastly girls so I don’t care. Please still be my 3rd bff except for Julius cos his always making me lol out loud and Glated cos his always kind to me. One day I will steal Julius' tennis racket LOLZ!!!!!

Don't call me "Galts".

I'll f*cking destroy you.

by **Galted** Mon 15 Sep 2014, 5:48 pm

Rowley wrote:Evening all. The Highclere area is nearly as posh ad imagine Tina's hometown to be, and ten times as dull. There is nearly nothing here, and what little there is appears to close around half ten in the morning.

Evening, Jeff. That'll teach you to cancel your London plans and holiday elsewhere. It's the annual Northerners Festival in Greenwich this week - nothing but free Chinese meals, boxing documentaries, jazz bands and beheading southern woofters all week.

by Rowley Mon 15 Sep 2014, 6:10 pm

In all fairness Gated if they started beheading southern woofters in London last weekend I could go this Saturday and they'd have barely scratched the surface.

by **Galted** Mon 15 Sep 2014, 7:53 pm

Rowley wrote:In all fairness Gated if they started beheading southern woofters in London last weekend I could go this Saturday and they'd have barely scratched the surface.

You better watch out for me though, I'm as hard as nails - didn't even put my lunch humus in the fridge at work.

by **Pal Joey** Mon 15 Sep 2014, 9:35 pm

Galted wrote:Has anyone got an old ESPIRIT tin they don't need? It'll complete my old biscuit tin collection so I'm willing to pay an obscene amount of money for it.

Sorry mate. I've already given it away to Charity.

She loves it. Apparently her shell collection will fit well in there.

by **JuliusHMarx** Mon 15 Sep 2014, 9:43 pm

Reminds of the Steven Wright joke.
I have a very large shell collection. You might have seen it - I keep it scattered on various beaches over the world.

by **Pal Joey** Mon 15 Sep 2014, 9:59 pm

Just awaiting a cranky Irish excavator man. Reminds me of a nastier version of O'Reilly (or Orally) from that Fawlty Towers episode. He started swearing about 30 seconds after he opened his mouth yesterday. "Ah.. we'll just move that f*cken skip and put it fooken over dere..."

by **Pal Joey** Mon 15 Sep 2014, 10:00 pm

Here he is. Right on fooken time!

by **Galted** Mon 15 Sep 2014, 10:23 pm

Jokingly call him a f*cking mick p1ss-head or ask where in England he's from, they love that.

by **JuliusHMarx** Mon 15 Sep 2014, 10:37 pm

Galted, I'm surprised and pleased that you consider me capable of that. You're not wrong though.

by **Galted** Mon 15 Sep 2014, 11:05 pm

If you look at my previous post you will realise that you've just painted yourself as a terrible racist, Julius. But I find it infuriatingly easy to imagine you sweet-talking Galtova into the sack with an onslaught of delicious punnery and glimpses of your John Thomas.

by **Pal Joey** Tue 16 Sep 2014, 12:00 am

Galted wrote:Jokingly call him a f*cking mick p1ss-head or ask where in England he's from, they love that.

There's 4 of them on site now.
Can hardly understand a word any of them are saying. Somet'ing about a fooken tree stump they've encountered.
Just dig the fooker out, mun!

by **seanmichaels** Tue 16 Sep 2014, 8:19 am

Rowley wrote:Evening all. The Highclere area is nearly as posh ad imagine Tina's hometown to be, and ten times as dull. There is nearly nothing here, and what little there is appears to close around half ten in the morning.

Get yourself down to Winchester. 20 mins or so.

by **seanmichaels** Tue 16 Sep 2014, 8:23 am

Heard an advert on the radio this morning offering Hampton by Hilton. Thought most people had already seen the video unless it is a new one?

by **superflyweight** Tue 16 Sep 2014, 8:59 am

She's nearly as dead a ride as Jordan. C'mon love, wrap some minge around it.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 16 Sep 2014, 9:21 am

superflyweight wrote:C'mon love, wrap some minge around it.

I hope you lot stay in the UK. Quotes like that would be a loss to us all.

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 16 Sep 2014, 9:25 am

Tino wrote:I hope you lot stay in the UK. Quotes like that would be a loss to us all.

Typical scare mongering that is Tino, from "Project Fear"

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 16 Sep 2014, 9:28 am

And thread split day too, expecting some tactical posting from Jeff...

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 16 Sep 2014, 9:29 am

rick_dagless wrote:
Tino wrote:I hope you lot stay in the UK. Quotes like that would be a loss to us all.

Typical scare mongering that is Tino, from "Project Fear"

Morning Ricko. I am still reeling from Jeff describing my hometown as 'posh'. I think you need to have a quiet word in his ear about Runcorn. The place would be delighted with that description.

What have you got on today? More sweaty men lying about what they have and haven't done?

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 16 Sep 2014, 9:31 am

Tino wrote:I think you need to have a quiet word in his ear about Runcorn

I was pretty speechless, to be honest Tino, just a quick Trip Advisor search would probably shed some light.

Tino wrote:What have you got on today? More sweaty men lying about what they have and haven't done?

Pretty much, and also what they are about to do, and how they may or may not do it. Either way, lots of sweat and lying involved.

You? Just the usual casual gambling of small fortunes on fickle markets?

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 16 Sep 2014, 9:34 am

rick_dagless wrote:
Tino wrote:I think you need to have a quiet word in his ear about Runcorn

I was pretty speechless, to be honest Tino, just a quick Trip Advisor search would probably shed some light.

Tino wrote:What have you got on today? More sweaty men lying about what they have and haven't done?

Pretty much, and also what they are about to do, and how they may or may not do it. Either way, lots of sweat and lying involved.

You? Just the usual casual gambling of small fortunes on fickle markets?

Nah, I am at home these days so out of the front line till the missus is back on her feet.

Doing some research and consultation for the company. But in reality, I am on here and looking at porn for large swathes of the day. Might wander down to the village store for some shoplifting later if the mist clears.

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 16 Sep 2014, 9:45 am

Tino wrote: Might wander down to the village store for some shoplifting later if the mist clears.

One of the benefits of Runcorn is the permanent smog...

Though back in the day you used to be able to go to the shops with a pound, get Sweets, some crisps and a can of pop, and still have money left. Nowadays, CCTV everywhere.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 16 Sep 2014, 9:50 am

rick_dagless wrote:Nowadays, CCTV everywhere.

Good times for you and 'Fly though.

Far more people to ~~rip off with extortionate legal fees~~ prosecute/defend.

by **seanmichaels** Tue 16 Sep 2014, 10:01 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote: But in reality, I am on here and looking at porn for large swathes of the day. Might wander down to the village store for some shoplifting later if the mist clears.

Back in 2007 i took redundancy and ended up having 3 months off work. I remember drinking wine at ridiculous times in the morning.

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 16 Sep 2014, 10:12 am

Tino wrote:Far more people to rip off with extortionate legal fees prosecute/defend.

Here to help the common good Tino...

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 16 Sep 2014, 10:13 am

seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote: But in reality, I am on here and looking at porn for large swathes of the day. Might wander down to the village store for some shoplifting later if the mist clears.

Back in 2007 i took redundancy and ended up having 3 months off work. I remember drinking wine at ridiculous times in the morning.

Can't say I have started that yet. I have had 2 cups of filter coffee and a tea already though. Pretty wild stuff but I am a maverick who doesn't play by the rules. Deal with it.

by **JuliusHMarx** Tue 16 Sep 2014, 10:16 am

rick_dagless wrote:Though back in the day you used to be able to go to the shops with a pound, get Sweets, some crisps and a can of pop, and still have money left.

Tino used go to the shops with a pound, get sweets, some crisps and a can of pop, and still have a pound left.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 16 Sep 2014, 10:17 am

JuliusHMarx wrote:
rick_dagless wrote:
Tino wrote:Though back in the day you used to be able to go to the shops with a pound, get Sweets, some crisps and a can of pop, and still have money left.

Tino used go to the shops with a pound, get sweets, some crisps and a can of pop, and still have a pound left.

Edit - I messed up the quote function. I'm sean!

Sean?

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 16 Sep 2014, 10:17 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:
rick_dagless wrote:
Tino wrote:Though back in the day you used to be able to go to the shops with a pound, get Sweets, some crisps and a can of pop, and still have money left.

Tino used go to the shops with a pound, get sweets, some crisps and a can of pop, and still have a pound left.

Edit - I messed up the quote function. I'm sean!

Sean?

Balls! You're quick for an old fella, Jules.

by Sponsored content