The Culture Cup Round x - Adam is a naughty naughty boy

by **Union Cane** Mon 23 Mar 2015, 2:01 pm

First topic message reminder :

Rowley wrote:Got about 15 films for less than 40 quid so thought if I only like half of them it represents decent value. Unfortunately N by NW is not one of them, which is a pity as I have seen that and enjoyed it

Does it include that one with the birds, I forget what it is called.

by Mind the windows Tino. Mon 30 Mar 2015, 3:49 pm

I fingered Angelina Jolie during her brief, but hugely satisfying, work experience at Halton Lea library.

by **seanmichaels** Mon 30 Mar 2015, 3:51 pm

gospel

by **seanmichaels** Mon 30 Mar 2015, 3:55 pm

Former England cricketer Alan Mullally has a substantial hampton.

by Guest Mon 30 Mar 2015, 3:59 pm

Pippa Middleton used to work in a chip shop in Batley. She once let me tease her lady area with a Savaloy.....apparently they'd run out of batter for the fish so I was doing the Community a service

by **Union Cane** Mon 30 Mar 2015, 3:59 pm

seanmichaels wrote:Former England cricketer Alan Mullally has a substantial hampton.

Have you smoked it?

by Guest Mon 30 Mar 2015, 4:00 pm

seanmichaels wrote:Former England cricketer Alan Mullally has a substantial hampton.

Do you quantify "substantial" as just being able to fit it in your mouth or your bottom, Sean?

by **seanmichaels** Mon 30 Mar 2015, 4:01 pm

Union Cane wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Former England cricketer Alan Mullally has a substantial hampton.

Have you smoked it?

No. I've never chewed hampton.

I was in a 6 aside tournament which he was involved in. Communal showers.

by Mind the windows Tino. Mon 30 Mar 2015, 4:04 pm

seanmichaels wrote:Communal showers. Where we all ran around naked whipping each others bare bottoms with rolled up towels.

by **Union Cane** Mon 30 Mar 2015, 4:10 pm

Giant Oboe, Showering Publicly, Ex Leicestershire.

by Adam D Mon 30 Mar 2015, 4:15 pm

Van Morrison got my mate sacked once.

He was playing at a really rubbish venue in Newport (or just a really rubbish town). My mate went to the toilet and stood next to VM at the urinal. He asked him why he was playing such a rubbish venue.

Turned out that the owner was a log time friend of VM who snitched on my mate and he got his marching orders.

No bright side of the road for my mate.

by Guest Mon 30 Mar 2015, 4:16 pm

Adam D wrote:Van Morrison got my mate sacked once.

He was playing at a really rubbish venue in Newport (or just a really rubbish town). My mate went to the toilet and stood next to VM at the urinal. He asked him why he was playing such a rubbish venue.

Turned out that the owner was a log time friend of VM who snitched on my mate and he got his marching orders.

No bright side of the road for my mate.

Sean has those

by Adam D Mon 30 Mar 2015, 4:17 pm

DAVE667 wrote:
Adam D wrote:Van Morrison got my mate sacked once.

He was playing at a really rubbish venue in Newport (or just a really rubbish town). My mate went to the toilet and stood next to VM at the urinal. He asked him why he was playing such a rubbish venue.

Turned out that the owner was a log time friend of VM who snitched on my mate and he got his marching orders.

No bright side of the road for my mate.
Sean has those

that typo was quite apt bearing in mind it took place in the toilets

by Guest Mon 30 Mar 2015, 4:20 pm

Adam D wrote:
DAVE667 wrote:
Adam D wrote:Van Morrison got my mate sacked once.

He was playing at a really rubbish venue in Newport (or just a really rubbish town). My mate went to the toilet and stood next to VM at the urinal. He asked him why he was playing such a rubbish venue.

Turned out that the owner was a log time friend of VM who snitched on my mate and he got his marching orders.

No bright side of the road for my mate.
Sean has those
that typo was quite apt bearing in mind it took place in the toilets

Could only have been improved if you'd typed, "My mate went to the toilet and stooled next to VM at the urinal"

by kingraf Mon 30 Mar 2015, 5:55 pm

If anyone wants to know... the OneDirection concert was infinitely better than the Michael Bublè one.

by **Galted** Mon 30 Mar 2015, 7:19 pm

Union Cane wrote:
Galted wrote:My excellent music anecdote was rudely ignored.

Which one was that?

The one which I posted on Friday, 27 March at 20:08.

by Rowley Mon 30 Mar 2015, 7:22 pm

Watching University Challenge tonight Galted? If Paxman does not play fair and give me popular music as the music round tonight I may have to set Dave on him.

by **Galted** Mon 30 Mar 2015, 7:27 pm

DAVE667 wrote:
Union Cane wrote:
Galted wrote:My excellent music anecdote was rudely ignored.

Which one was that?
I would have commented on it's excellence but it was about someone laughing at metalheads so f*ck Galted and his stupid stories

I find it quite curious that you think he's a bona fide metalhead, David. Surely being crestfallen should revoke any metalhead status he may have once held. If he'd been confused, or unhinged, or had his head stuck in a door then fair enough, but to call my story stupid on the assumption that he's a metalhead is quite hurtful. Not just to me but to other wearers of rugged yet stylish clothing (including footwear) who look phucking nothing like Ray Mears.

by **Galted** Mon 30 Mar 2015, 7:30 pm

Rowley wrote:Watching University Challenge tonight Galted? If Paxman does not play fair and give me popular music as the music round tonight I may have to set Dave on him.

Too right, Jeff. Hoping for more cricket and wildlife related questions so that I can annoy Galtova. Have taken to answering art-related questions with "Caravaggio" instead of "Matisse". Maybe tonight's the night.

You ready to humiliate TSMR? I heard a rumour that tonight's episode concentrates on black heavyweights between the wars.

by Rowley Mon 30 Mar 2015, 7:45 pm

She is at the gym Galted, but it's on record, if, as you say, there is indeed a focus on early black heavyweights I'll watch it again when she comes home, I'll take her to the f'ing cleaners.

by **Galted** Mon 30 Mar 2015, 8:42 pm

Staggeringly successful episode, I don't think I would've been out of place on one of the teams apart from looking like one of their dads. Got all the questions on whales and on S African languages, at least 3 literature ones and a few others. Lost count as Galtova claimed that it was a repeat and I'd seen it before but 11-3 would be a ball-park score. And all the contestants were men. Having a c0ck rules.

by Rowley Mon 30 Mar 2015, 10:51 pm

You annihilated me mate, about seven or eight, and a seven or eight which is almost certainly nearer five or six if I'm being completely honest with myself.

Gonville vs Magdelen in the final I think.

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 31 Mar 2015, 7:32 am

Fist, morning all...

by **JuliusHMarx** Tue 31 Mar 2015, 8:06 am

Morning rick. You are indeed the fistest of us all.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 31 Mar 2015, 8:13 am

Morning team.

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 31 Mar 2015, 8:21 am

Feels pretty sweet Jules...

Morning Jules/Tino.

Are we both well? Survived the brisk winds?

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 31 Mar 2015, 8:25 am

rick_dagless wrote:Feels pretty sweet Jules...

Morning Jules/Tino.

Are we both well? Survived the brisk winds?

I'm good thanks, although my whole body is still sore. I tried to get my usual 45 minutes sleep on the way in but kept waking up every time I moved onto a painful bit.

How are you?

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 31 Mar 2015, 8:39 am

Fair to middling mate, looking forward to a long weekend however, ennui is firmly in.

by kingraf Tue 31 Mar 2015, 8:40 am

Morning all.

by **seanmichaels** Tue 31 Mar 2015, 8:41 am

Bloody wind is a nightmare for my barnet. Unravels the comb over.

Boxing boards slow. Radio reporting Ward has agreed to fight Froch in UK.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 31 Mar 2015, 8:45 am

rick_dagless wrote:Fair to middling mate, looking forward to a long weekend however, ennui is firmly in.

Mrs Windows is going to Spain on Thursday with her bessie mate for the long weekend. Leaving me with all the kids for 4 days straight. I'm thinking McDonalds, KFC, Burger King and fish and chips. That should cover dinners.

Morning Raf, any concerts planned? Taylor Swift? Bruno Mars? Girls Aloud?

by **ShahenshahG** Tue 31 Mar 2015, 8:46 am

Morning Gents. Dud day, rugby injury still sore, weak tea and no donuts this morning. I'm going to punch someones lights out soon.

by **seanmichaels** Tue 31 Mar 2015, 8:51 am

Hunger is a weakness but weak tea is unacceptable

by kingraf Tue 31 Mar 2015, 9:09 am

Morning Tiña. Don't think so, no. One of the OneDirection members were missing, the Muslim one. Not sure if it's like John Lennon leaving the Beatles, or Stuart Sutcliffe.

Would do nasty things to Taylor Swift though. Sexually, not in the Kanye West way

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 31 Mar 2015, 9:11 am

kingraf wrote:

Would do nasty things to Taylor Swift though. Sexually

Would you really want to go there after Sean though?

by **ShahenshahG** Tue 31 Mar 2015, 9:15 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
kingraf wrote:

Would do nasty things to Taylor Swift though. Sexually

Would you really want to go there after Sean though?

Aye you might get there at a bad time and end up getting a speeding ticket as your car falls through his arse.

by kingraf Tue 31 Mar 2015, 9:16 am

Sean would probably be in bed with a Taylor, alright. But I doubt I'd know him.

by **seanmichaels** Tue 31 Mar 2015, 9:18 am

Wouldn't do Swift. She'd probably bore me with some women's rights sh!t or something like that.

by **Union Cane** Tue 31 Mar 2015, 9:24 am

Gone Off Swift, Preferences Exclude Lesbians

by **seanmichaels** Tue 31 Mar 2015, 9:28 am

Dutch girls must be punished for having big boobs.

by **ShahenshahG** Tue 31 Mar 2015, 9:39 am

Gentlemen Only, Sean Prefers Entry, Ladies.

by **Union Cane** Tue 31 Mar 2015, 9:40 am

seanmichaels wrote:Dutch girls must be punished for having big boobs.

Wrong site, mate.

by **ShahenshahG** Tue 31 Mar 2015, 9:41 am

Union Cane wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Dutch girls must be punished for having big boobs.

Wrong site, mate.

Right wrong site Union, read between the lines. He's accidentlyonpurpose put it in to start rumours that he's not gay.

by **JuliusHMarx** Tue 31 Mar 2015, 10:26 am

I wouldn't do Taylor Swift. I'd do her slow.

by **Union Cane** Tue 31 Mar 2015, 10:30 am

Does Swift swallow?

by Guest Tue 31 Mar 2015, 10:34 am

seanmichaels wrote:Dutch girls must be punished for having big boobs.

Apologies in advance to the MODS but Sean is clearly the biggest f*cking c*nt this site has ever encountered (and I'll go so far as to include myself on that list) Never in all my days have I read such a monumentally stupid f*cking thing and I'll point out that I was here when Ralphy was in full flow.

I will occasionally call for a poster to be banned based on their previous stupidity and their habit of ruining the forum with their nationalistic nonsense or generally just being a tw*t but I'm going one further and asking that Sean be treated like a member of the old Soviet Polit bureau and removed from history entirely.

I will NOT stand for comments like the one he's just made above

by **seanmichaels** Tue 31 Mar 2015, 10:35 am

Union Cane wrote:Does Swift swallow?

What a good place to be, don't believe it.

by **seanmichaels** Tue 31 Mar 2015, 10:36 am

DAVE667 wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Dutch girls must be punished for having big boobs.
Apologies in advance to the MODS but Sean is clearly the biggest f*cking c*nt this site has ever encountered (and I'll go so far as to include myself on that list) Never in all my days have I read such a monumentally stupid f*cking thing and I'll point out that I was here when Ralphy was in full flow.

I will occasionally call for a poster to be banned based on their previous stupidity and their habit of ruining the forum with their nationalistic nonsense or generally just being a tw*t but I'm going one further and asking that Sean be treated like a member of the old Soviet Polit bureau and removed from history entirely.

I will NOT stand for comments like the one he's just made above

You not seen the office Dave?

by **seanmichaels** Tue 31 Mar 2015, 10:40 am

And , you don't punish anyone, Dutch or otherwise, for having big boobs.

by Guest Tue 31 Mar 2015, 10:48 am

FFS it's one of those "in" gags, is it? The fact it's Gervais related is even worse...c*nt

by **seanmichaels** Tue 31 Mar 2015, 10:52 am

No, they must be punished.

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