That really grinds my gears thread

by **Crimey** Mon 06 Apr 2015, 2:29 pm

First topic message reminder :

Removed the old one because it was full of crap.

Remember that this section is open only under the condition that it isn't used to attack others. Attacks based on religion was a big reason why it was closed the last two times, so cut it out. If you can't play nicely, don't play at all.

Next time I'm just deleting the section, it's a waste of my time having to wade through all the crap. This thread is supposed to be light-hearted, keep it that way.

by TopHat24/7 Wed 30 Mar 2016, 4:34 pm

Which specialises in things not visible to the naked eye they're so small...

by **ShahenshahG** Wed 30 Mar 2016, 4:41 pm

DAVE667 wrote:
ShahenshahG wrote:
DAVE667 wrote:
ShahenshahG wrote:
DAVE667 wrote:"not unreasonable" the closest my wife gets to an apology

There goes Dave again, trying to shoehorn his p*nis into the conversation
It's not the conversation I want to shoehorn it into though!
There's very little else that would require a shoehorn to get it in.
There's the Hadron Collider

That would require an adaptor rather than a shoehorn.

by Guest Wed 30 Mar 2016, 7:17 pm

ShahenshahG wrote:
DAVE667 wrote:
ShahenshahG wrote:
DAVE667 wrote:
ShahenshahG wrote:
DAVE667 wrote:"not unreasonable" the closest my wife gets to an apology

There goes Dave again, trying to shoehorn his p*nis into the conversation
It's not the conversation I want to shoehorn it into though!
There's very little else that would require a shoehorn to get it in.
There's the Hadron Collider
That would require an adaptor rather than a shoehorn.

At best it would require a quick squirt of WD40 and a short run up

by compelling and rich Wed 30 Mar 2016, 8:30 pm

anybody who uses the word "bae"

(apart from me then, to complain about people using the word)

by Duty281 Wed 30 Mar 2016, 8:33 pm

Falling in love with a heterosexual Christian guy.

Oh Duty, why do you punish yourself so?

by **Galted** Wed 30 Mar 2016, 11:24 pm

Keep your chin up, Duty, Christians are massive hypocrites so you could be in there.

by Mad for Chelsea Wed 30 Mar 2016, 11:31 pm

TopHat24/7 wrote:Which specialises in things not visible to the naked eye they're so small...

nearly missed this Laugh

by TRUSSMAN66 Thu 31 Mar 2016, 10:44 am

Duty281 wrote:Falling in love with a heterosexual Christian guy.

Oh Duty, why do you punish yourself so?

When he asks you if you want to get stoned...

For heaven sake say NO !!

by TRUSSMAN66 Fri 01 Apr 2016, 11:22 am

Have a problem when people don't regard an adult who knowingly sleeps with a girl of 15 a PED......This argument that a 15 year old girl can pass for an 18 year old doesn't wash if "you know" she is 15 !!..

More than happy to see that footballer get 6 years.......

If not 16 then when ??? 15 ???....14 ???

Johnson is scum and he is in the right place...

If he didn't know her age then that is another debate.....But he did.

by Guest Thu 07 Apr 2016, 11:30 am

Ronnie Pickering! What a pr!ck he is this time round.

by **Pr4wn** Thu 07 Apr 2016, 11:38 am

What's he done now?

by **rIck_dAgless** Thu 07 Apr 2016, 11:44 am

Pr4wn wrote:What's he done now?

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3525990/Ranting-Ronnie-Pickering-Britain-s-angriest-man-caught-video-hurling-abuse-traffic-warden-approached-elderly-couple-parked-double-yellow-lines.html

by Guest Thu 07 Apr 2016, 5:47 pm

Pamphlets through your door about leaving the EU which have the words "The FACTS!" printed on them. They aren't facts, they're your utterly biased opinion, don't waste my f*cking time until you can tell the true. However, I suspect you c*nts are so bent you can't lie straight in bed and are so crooked they'd have to screw your coffins into the ground

Teambuilding days...f*ck that, if I'd wanted to get to know my colleagues I'd have made the f*cking effort four years ago when the changes to my section were introduced. Add to this the fact that I didn't make efforts to get to know anyone in the twelve years prior to the reshuffle and you'll have some indication of how little interest I have in "getting to know people". In my experience the vast majority of people are OK, some are great and some are b*stards. I don't hang with the latter due to personal choice, I don't hang with the former due to their personal choice. Whatever, I'm happy, leave my the f*ck alone to get on with my job.

by Guest Thu 07 Apr 2016, 6:15 pm

Duty281 wrote:Falling in love with a heterosexual Christian guy.

Oh Duty, why do you punish yourself so?

Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's ass, Duty!

by TRUSSMAN66 Fri 08 Apr 2016, 11:32 am

DAVE667 wrote:Pamphlets through your door about leaving the EU which have the words "The FACTS!" printed on them. They aren't facts, they're your utterly biased opinion, don't waste my f*cking time until you can tell the true. However, I suspect you c*nts are so bent you can't lie straight in bed and are so crooked they'd have to screw your coffins into the ground

Teambuilding days...f*ck that, if I'd wanted to get to know my colleagues I'd have made the f*cking effort four years ago when the changes to my section were introduced. Add to this the fact that I didn't make efforts to get to know anyone in the twelve years prior to the reshuffle and you'll have some indication of how little interest I have in "getting to know people". In my experience the vast majority of people are OK, some are great and some are b*stards. I don't hang with the latter due to personal choice, I don't hang with the former due to their personal choice. Whatever, I'm happy, leave my the f*ck alone to get on with my job.

I never read them.......Just slap them in the bin..

Best time is when you get the smug Tory canvassers at the locals coming around taking votes for granted......I'll keep nodding my head in agreement with them for about ten minutes before I tell them I won't be voting Conservative..

by Guest Fri 08 Apr 2016, 12:12 pm

TRUSSMAN66 wrote:
DAVE667 wrote:Pamphlets through your door about leaving the EU which have the words "The FACTS!" printed on them. They aren't facts, they're your utterly biased opinion, don't waste my f*cking time until you can tell the true. However, I suspect you c*nts are so bent you can't lie straight in bed and are so crooked they'd have to screw your coffins into the ground

Teambuilding days...f*ck that, if I'd wanted to get to know my colleagues I'd have made the f*cking effort four years ago when the changes to my section were introduced. Add to this the fact that I didn't make efforts to get to know anyone in the twelve years prior to the reshuffle and you'll have some indication of how little interest I have in "getting to know people". In my experience the vast majority of people are OK, some are great and some are b*stards. I don't hang with the latter due to personal choice, I don't hang with the former due to their personal choice. Whatever, I'm happy, leave my the f*ck alone to get on with my job.

I never read them.......Just slap them in the bin..

Best time is when you get the smug Tory canvassers at the locals coming around taking votes for granted......I'll keep nodding my head in agreement with them for about ten minutes before I tell them I won't be voting Conservative..

They take one look at my shaved head and tattoos and assume I've be voting for the Patriotic Legion of British Decency

by Guest Tue 10 May 2016, 10:24 am

HR departments!

I don't care how much I earned 2 years ago, what counts is what I earn now which is more than what your organisation is looking to pay me you bunch of c*nts!

by **Pal Joey** Tue 10 May 2016, 1:38 pm

Don't get me started, killer. They are all a f*cking useless bunch of non-productive parasites.
I'd like to send them all to Aleppo or Bradford. Then see how they fare there.

by Guest Tue 10 May 2016, 2:04 pm

There are totally useless!

And to think the Public Sector wonders why it can't attract high calibre staff if they have to go through un-necessary ballache.

by Guest Tue 10 May 2016, 2:08 pm

The Nation's love-in with Sheridan Smith...what's so great about her, this is the chavvy wretch who needed no acting to play her character in Two Pints of Lager....now were supposed to think she's Dame Maggie Smith, Dame Judi Dench and Dame Helen Mirren all rolled into one.

by Stella Tue 10 May 2016, 2:30 pm

Not relevant, but Two pints of lager is possibly the worst sitcom ever made. I did like Smith in The Royle Family though.

by Guest Tue 10 May 2016, 3:32 pm

Caroline Aherne...one of TV's smuggest c*nts...thought her sh!t smelled better than everyone's then had a highly publicized fall from grace (hahahaha). Didn't help that she looks like one of my exes so I wanted to punch both their stupid faces in simultaneously on various occasions

Ricky Tomlinson, f*cking one trick pony and not a very good trick at that.

Ralph Little, see above

by Stella Tue 10 May 2016, 3:33 pm

Not a big Royle Family fan, Dave?

by Guest Tue 10 May 2016, 3:42 pm

F*cking dole dossing scrounging scum bleeding the f*cking country dry and we're supposed to find it all hilarious. Carla Lane did the same with "Bread" in the 80's. Scousers...dole scum...thieves...cheeky chaps...it'll be fine, people love to laugh at that sort of thing.

Reality TV with these dole dossing b*stards who are now f*cking celebrities. C*nts watching tv and being filmed watching it...they're f*cking celebrities. Some skank f*cks Wayne Rooney and sticks a dildo up the ar$e of the bloke from Downton Abbey...she's a f*cking celebrity.

Daniella Westbrook returns to EastEnders for the millionth time as she obviously needs repairs to her nose. Barbara Windsor refuses to f*ck of an die. Leaves EastEnders then before she's cleared her dressing room she's in talks about when she's going to return.

by TopHat24/7 Tue 10 May 2016, 6:00 pm

IT departments - worse than HR. Useless f*ckwitting c*ckwombling morons that NEVER do the job properly.

by **Galted** Tue 10 May 2016, 7:26 pm

TopHat24/7 wrote:IT departments - worse than HR. Useless f*ckwitting c*ckwombling morons that NEVER do the job properly.

I don't think that your assessment is very fair, TopHat. I work in an IT department and, althought my colleagues are mostly useless, f*ckwitting c*ckwombling morons who NEVER do the job properly, they are also businessjargon-spouting, buck-passing, back-stabbing, credit-claiming c*nt-trumpets.

by **navyblueshorts** Wed 11 May 2016, 1:21 pm

Use of the made up 'inputting' or 'inputted' when talking about data entry. WTF is wrong with 'entering' or 'entered'?

by Guest Wed 11 May 2016, 2:47 pm

People referring to body language as NVC's (non-verbal communicators)

Oh just f*ck off and die!

by Guest Wed 11 May 2016, 6:08 pm

C*nts who think it's safe to back out onto a main road from a side street whilst talking on their mobile phone!!

W*nker!

by Duty281 Wed 11 May 2016, 6:14 pm

You're a lot calmer these days, Dave.

You must have a bloody good therapist. thumbsup

by **ShahenshahG** Wed 11 May 2016, 6:16 pm

Duty281 wrote:You're a lot calmer these days, Dave.

You must have a bloodyied ~~good~~ therapist.

fixed that for you

Catharsis is the way Duty.

by Guest Wed 11 May 2016, 6:35 pm

Duty281 wrote:You're a lot calmer these days, Dave.

You must have a bloody good therapist.

I ply my wife with alcohol and rant away...I'm oblivious to whether she's listening or not

by Corporalhumblebucket Wed 11 May 2016, 6:44 pm

A sudden outbreak of faux "quarters" on signs for different parts of the local town. If they are going to do it they should at least do it properly and designate the town centre as the "charity shop quarter".

by Guest Wed 11 May 2016, 7:07 pm

Corporalhumblebucket wrote:A sudden outbreak of faux "quarters" on signs for different parts of the local town. If they are going to do it they should at least do it properly and designate the town centre as the "charity shop quarter".

Bradford Council are on it as we speak

by SecretFly Wed 11 May 2016, 8:06 pm

The Latin Quarter
The Chinese Quarter
The Nightclub Quarter
The Bohemian Quarter
The Retail Quarter
.... and the Pie Chart Quarter are really the only six Quarters you need in any functioning town or city.

by Adam D Wed 11 May 2016, 8:42 pm

Shouldn't it be the Latin Fifth etc?

by **Galted** Wed 11 May 2016, 8:54 pm

Quarters are amongst my favourite types of fraction.

by Rowley Wed 11 May 2016, 8:57 pm

Eighths for me Galted. A by-product of my years of heavy weed misuse.

by **Galted** Wed 11 May 2016, 8:59 pm

I do like eighths but would like them even more if I could spell type them out without having to check the spelling.

by **rIck_dAgless** Thu 12 May 2016, 7:14 am

Anyone or anything that tries to anthropomorphize the world wide web.

Such as "The internet was left speechless yesterday" or "the internet was annoyed yesterday when..."

by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 12 May 2016, 8:28 am

rick_dagless wrote:Anyone or anything that tries to anthropomorphize the world wide web.

Such as "The internet was left speechless yesterday" or "the internet was annoyed yesterday when..."

What about when Kim broke t'internet, does that count?

by **rIck_dAgless** Thu 12 May 2016, 9:03 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
rick_dagless wrote:Anyone or anything that tries to anthropomorphize the world wide web.

Such as "The internet was left speechless yesterday" or "the internet was annoyed yesterday when..."

What about when Kim broke t'internet, does that count?

Equally as bad...

by **Pr4wn** Thu 12 May 2016, 9:14 am

Rowley wrote:Eighths for me Galted. A by-product of my years of heavy weed misuse.

If you were a heavy user surely you preferred quarters?

by **ShahenshahG** Thu 12 May 2016, 9:18 am

Pr4wn wrote:
Rowley wrote:Eighths for me Galted. A by-product of my years of heavy weed misuse.

If you were a heavy user surely you preferred quarters?

No he had to pay by bank transfer because they were put off by his cent

by Guest Thu 12 May 2016, 10:44 am

rick_dagless wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
rick_dagless wrote:Anyone or anything that tries to anthropomorphize the world wide web.

Such as "The internet was left speechless yesterday" or "the internet was annoyed yesterday when..."

What about when Kim broke t'internet, does that count?

Equally as bad...

Broke the internet...you mean more people than usual looked at pictures of your f*nny, you f*cking disgusting shameless, attention grabbing c*nt. You, your family and anyone associated with you should be f*cking killed.

by SecretFly Thu 12 May 2016, 11:13 am

This morning it's people who use BEING OFFENDED as a power tool to deny others the right to alternative views, opinion and/or JOKES.

Read this morning that a guy put up a video of him teaching his girlfriend's little dog how to do a Nazi salute.... to annoy her because she's always telling him how cute the dog is. He even says the reason that he picked the Nazis is because they are the exact opposite of cute.

Arrested and charged with Hate Crimes! Shocked

- because the regular Professional 'offended' found it obviously and laid down their well oiled machine to test out their ever growing powers.

And our Western society claims it's a step up from the one Isis lords over?

Je Suis Hypocrisy! I think I'll get a tee-shirt printed up and start a movement Wink

by Guest Thu 12 May 2016, 12:07 pm

SecretFly wrote:This morning it's people who use BEING OFFENDED as a power tool to deny others the right to alternative views, opinion and/or JOKES.

Read this morning that a guy put up a video of him teaching his girlfriend's little dog how to do a Nazi salute.... to annoy her because she's always telling him how cute the dog is. He even says the reason that he picked the Nazis is because they are the exact opposite of cute.

Arrested and charged with Hate Crimes! - because the regular Professional 'offended' found it obviously and laid down their well oiled machine to test out their ever growing powers.

And our Western society claims it's a step up from the one Isis lords over?

Je Suis Hypocrisy! I think I'll get a tee-shirt printed up and start a movement

One wonders if he'd taught the dog to stone gays cats to death, behead them or thrown them off a rooftop, whether he'd be in as much trouble.

"Woof, there's a rabbit unescorted in a public place...death to you, harlot!"

by TRUSSMAN66 Thu 12 May 2016, 7:42 pm

Random irritations
-------------------------------

If I hold a door open for you...Say "thank you..."

Say pardon... not "what ?"

Don't look at your phone if I'm talking to you..

Don't talk over me (Red favorite)..

If your Mum says no don't ask me because you know I'm soft..

Don't ask for my opinion if you've made up your mind..

If you know I want to watch something don't stay in the room making stupid comments...

Don't tell me about a problem that could have been dealt with earlier when I'm leaving to go home...

Getting older..

Pointless meetings..

Boston Red Sox..

Man City...

Women...

Work..

Kids...

Cars...

In-laws...

That about covers it...

by **Galted** Thu 12 May 2016, 9:02 pm

TRUSSMAN66 wrote:Random irritations
-------------------------------

Getting older..

Pointless meetings..

Boston Red Sox..

Man City...

Women...

Work..

Kids...

Cars...

In-laws...

That about covers it...

I've got a Boston Red Sox shirt.

by Guest Fri 13 May 2016, 11:03 am

I've support a football club owned by the guy who owns the Red Sox...his wife is as fit as f*ck

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