The etiquette of shaking hands.

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The etiquette of shaking hands.

Post by 4putt on Thu 28 Jun 2018, 2:31 pm

Have to get this off my chest as it's annoying me.

I play regularly with someone who really bugs me at the end of a round. With all my other playing partners we remove our caps etc, shake hands and make eye contact with a smile regardless of how our game has gone. This guy will always shake hands whilst turning away and looking at the ground. Never looks you in the face or makes eye contact or removes his cap.

I'm at the point now of thinking of holding onto his hand and asking if we have a problem.

Maybe it's me who has a problem of making more out of it than I should, but just find his handshake disrespectful and insincere.

Is it a cultural thing? I'm a Brit and he's an Aussie.

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Re: The etiquette of shaking hands.

Post by McLaren on Thu 28 Jun 2018, 2:36 pm

It's always awkward when you shake hands and know you haven't washed your hands since your last tam shank.
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Re: The etiquette of shaking hands.

Post by Roller_Coaster on Thu 28 Jun 2018, 3:23 pm

When you say Aussie is that slang for autistic? Only partially flippant as a comment, I guess it is possible he might have some kind of mental/physical issue?

Ask him nicely if he's noticed he's doing it if it does bother you that much. Or might be a cultural thing in which case the British way would just be to accept it with seeming good grace (and then post about it on a forum!).


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Re: The etiquette of shaking hands.

Post by kwinigolfer on Thu 28 Jun 2018, 3:39 pm

That would p1ss me off too.
And I now need no reminder not to play golf with Mac.

Try the Drumpf technique of squeezing his hand until his nose bleeds . . . . . . . .

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Re: The etiquette of shaking hands.

Post by raycastleunited on Thu 28 Jun 2018, 4:31 pm

Maybe he's too busy stuffing sandpaper down his pants to shake hands properly?

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Re: The etiquette of shaking hands.

Post by Diggers on Thu 28 Jun 2018, 4:39 pm

I'd personally go down the route of thinking, yes, it's a tad annoying, but that life is too short to have potentially confrontational conversations about something that, in the grand scheme of things, is completely inconsequential.

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Re: The etiquette of shaking hands.

Post by McLaren on Thu 28 Jun 2018, 6:05 pm

Why are you even shaking hands at the end of the round anyway? It is only usually practiced after pretty formal rounds.
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Re: The etiquette of shaking hands.

Post by kwinigolfer on Thu 28 Jun 2018, 6:33 pm

Customary practice here, for sure. Can't imagine not doing it.

Always think worse of pros who don't do it after a round, na na na na, na na na na, hey, hey, hey

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Re: The etiquette of shaking hands.

Post by super_realist on Thu 28 Jun 2018, 6:42 pm

Some old spunker called me out for "bad etiquette" last week. I was waiting for the 10th to clear so was having a couple of chips around the ninth green adjacent to the clubhouse. (literally from the fringe, and making no mark at all, and with no one behind me)

I didn't think that was out of order at all, but he went effing ballistic. No idea why he had a problem with it, but he reacted like I'd just spat in his face.

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Re: The etiquette of shaking hands.

Post by JAS on Fri 29 Jun 2018, 8:23 am

I’d probably take several handshakes to notice it, then it would start to intrigue me like...why does he do that? What baggage is he carrying about handshakes? Then I’d probably drop a subtle comment in during post round beers. Has anybody else noticed it? Maybe it is you 4putt...if the guy has 0 sense of humour (admittedly unusual for an Aussie) is there any history of taking the P about Oz being a convict colony, or rubbing in a rugby, cricket win etc etc?

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Re: The etiquette of shaking hands.

Post by JAS on Fri 29 Jun 2018, 8:26 am

super_realist wrote:Some old spunker called me out for "bad etiquette" last week. I was waiting for the 10th to clear so was having a couple of chips around the ninth green adjacent to the clubhouse. (literally from the fringe, and making no mark at all, and with no one behind me)

I didn't think that was out of order at all, but he went effing ballistic. No idea why he had a problem with it, but he reacted like I'd just spat in his face.

As long as not the morning round of a 36 holer then what was his beef? Did you have the honour on the 10th? How did the back 9 go? :-p

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Re: The etiquette of shaking hands.

Post by super_realist on Fri 29 Jun 2018, 8:37 am

I was just out on my own for a bit of a practice Jas,

I wasn't even playing with the guy, he was just some old guy who'd arrived by the clubhouse who thought I shouldn't have returned to the green having completed the hole. I was simply killing time to let the two ball in front (who were looking for a ball) get up the fairway a bit and maintaining a bit of distance between us as I was hitting a couple of balls and having a putt/chip around each green so was in no rush to play through or even pressure them. (my chipping takes no divots at that range)

I thought it was completely ridiculous to react like he did, and especially the aggressive, typically Scottish way in which he approached the subject.

"YOU CAN'T DO THAT!!!!!" he shrieked. I honestly thought he was shouting at someone else. Couldn't see that I did anything wrong whatsoever, and considering he was in one of those mobility scooters and had a sky high handicap the chances are he does a lot more damage to the course than I do.

I told him to calm down and informed him I wasn't doing anything wrong, and he replied that he thought "my etiquette stinks". Just goes to show what anus's golfers can be getting involved in something which is none of his business.

I'd be interested to know what others thought of this. Was I in the wrong or if the guy was just being an officious plank?

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Re: The etiquette of shaking hands.

Post by JAS on Fri 29 Jun 2018, 8:41 am

Sounds like he’s heading for a coronary faster than his mobility scooter!!

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Re: The etiquette of shaking hands.

Post by navyblueshorts on Fri 29 Jun 2018, 9:57 am

Dunno 4p. What's his eye contact like with people the rest of the time? If he's an Aussie, he's probably embarrassed that his one-day cricket team has been tanked by England and his rugby team lost a series to Ireland....
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Re: The etiquette of shaking hands.

Post by LadyPutt on Fri 29 Jun 2018, 12:50 pm

I much prefer shaking hands to the rather twee pseudo hug and back slap with an air kiss which has become the norm with women's golf. Why would I want to hug and kiss someone who I don't necessarily like or don't know very well? Maybe the women at my club think I'm a bit strange and standoff-ish but I always shake hands!
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Re: The etiquette of shaking hands.

Post by raycastleunited on Fri 29 Jun 2018, 2:26 pm

McLaren wrote:Why are you even shaking hands at the end of the round anyway? It is only usually practiced after pretty formal rounds.

I guess it would be a bit weird for you to shake hands with yourself.

Most people generally play golf with other people and so shake hands at the end.

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Re: The etiquette of shaking hands.

Post by 4putt on Sun 01 Jul 2018, 2:47 am

JAS wrote:I’d probably take several handshakes to notice it, then it would start  to intrigue me like...why does he do that? What baggage is he carrying about handshakes? Then I’d probably drop a subtle comment in during post round beers. Has anybody else noticed it? Maybe it is you 4putt...if the guy has 0 sense of humour (admittedly unusual for an Aussie) is there any history of taking the P about Oz being a convict colony, or rubbing in a rugby, cricket win etc etc?

I made a point of watching him on the 18th on Friday and he's the same with everyone. Yes, loads of banter about being an Oz. He's not the only Aussie playing and they usually give as good as they get. One of the few nationalities that have a similar sense of humour to Brits. They understand sarcasm which goes straight over the heads of other nationalities.
In all other aspects were good mates. Think I'll just have to accept it. Not worth upsetting the apple cart over it.

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Re: The etiquette of shaking hands.

Post by dynamark on Sun 01 Jul 2018, 8:41 am

Couple of comments.A proper British style handshake is preferred not one of the American style grabs.I have refused just the once and the guy was the most disgusting person I have ever come across on a golf course.I was given one of those really nasty crusher handshakes from a site foreman when I had just started with his company,He was trying to hurt and did but I couldn't let him know that !

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Re: The etiquette of shaking hands.

Post by GPB on Sun 01 Jul 2018, 1:52 pm

I grudgingly did the hand-shake ritual after a round of golf. I am far from a germ-a-phobe but the idea of shaking the hand of three idudes after they have spent 4 hours in the hot sun and drinking copious amounts of fluid (and you know its inevitable side effects). The first thing I do upon entering the clubhouse is go to the rest room to wash my hands

I see the pros do it, many of the golfers like to rake their fingers through their hair {shudder} before they shake hands. Rory does it all the time, and he used to have that mop head.

Where's the hand sanitizer!

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Re: The etiquette of shaking hands.

Post by dynamark on Sun 01 Jul 2018, 9:20 pm

Howard Hughes is on the forum.

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Re: The etiquette of shaking hands.

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