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The Culture Cup Round 6 - new but not really improved

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Post by Rowley Tue 01 Jul 2014, 10:26 am

First topic message reminder :

May be an age thing, but is Sean seriously saying he talks to people with his testicles out to see how long they take to notice? And that doing so is a laugh?

Never thought I would say this, but bring back National Service if so.

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 02 Jul 2014, 8:51 am

Rowley wrote:How are things on the tennis board today Julius on the back of Nadal's exit. Would have a look in for myself, but have not quite recovered from the half hour I spent on there last year. Who'd have thought such a polite sport would have such fiery fans.

Did you see the youngsters trick shot? That was a real 'AVE IT moment.

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Post by Rowley Wed 02 Jul 2014, 8:52 am

Don't use the term sunnies Sean, it's a slippery slope from there to using the term tinnies to describe cans. The Australians have an excuse, they're Australian. We have no such excuse.

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Post by JuliusHMarx Wed 02 Jul 2014, 8:54 am

Hazel? You're on first name terms? Those badges come in useful don't they?
Time to turn on the charm seany, old son.
Not sure what you mean by 'lash', but I'm guessing best not to do it at the opticians.

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Post by Rowley Wed 02 Jul 2014, 8:54 am

seanmichaels wrote:
Rowley wrote:How are things on the tennis board today Julius on the back of Nadal's exit. Would have a look in for myself, but have not quite recovered from the half hour I spent on there last year. Who'd have thought such a polite sport would have such fiery fans.

Did you see the youngsters trick shot? That was a real 'AVE IT moment.

No of course I didn't. That would involve having watched tennis.

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Post by JuliusHMarx Wed 02 Jul 2014, 8:55 am

Rowley wrote:How are things on the tennis board today Julius on the back of Nadal's exit. Would have a look in for myself, but have not quite recovered from the half hour I spent on there last year. Who'd have thought such a polite sport would have such fiery fans.

Was OK until very late on, when Hero had to post a warning.

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 02 Jul 2014, 8:55 am

JuliusHMarx wrote:
Time to turn on the charm seany, old son.

Or alternatively, just hang your c*ck out of your trousers and turn your pockets inside out.

It's a winner.

Mind the windows Tino.
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Post by Rowley Wed 02 Jul 2014, 8:57 am

JuliusHMarx wrote:
Rowley wrote:How are things on the tennis board today Julius on the back of Nadal's exit. Would have a look in for myself, but have not quite recovered from the half hour I spent on there last year. Who'd have thought such a polite sport would have such fiery fans.

Was OK until very late on, when Hero had to post a warning.

Always gets a bit lively when the Pimms takes its toll.

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 02 Jul 2014, 8:57 am

Rowley wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:
Rowley wrote:How are things on the tennis board today Julius on the back of Nadal's exit. Would have a look in for myself, but have not quite recovered from the half hour I spent on there last year. Who'd have thought such a polite sport would have such fiery fans.

Did you see the youngsters trick shot? That was a real 'AVE IT moment.

No of course I didn't. That would involve having watched tennis.

 Laugh   Laugh 

Just when I think we are drifting apart, Jeff, you move right back into my affections.

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 02 Jul 2014, 8:57 am

Rowley wrote:Don't use the term sunnies Sean, it's a slippery slope from there to using the term tinnies to describe cans. The Australians have an excuse, they're Australian. We have no such excuse.

My best friend is a Queenslander. Over here again at the moment. Has a colloquialism for pretty much everything. My favourite is turtle chokers.

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Post by rIck_dAgless Wed 02 Jul 2014, 8:59 am

Probably more potting shed scene from Scum rather than Pottery scene from Ghost...

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 02 Jul 2014, 9:04 am

rick_dagless wrote:Probably more potting shed scene from Scum rather than Pottery scene from Ghost...

You never fail to make me smile, Rick.

Mind the windows Tino.
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Post by seanmichaels Wed 02 Jul 2014, 9:06 am

JuliusHMarx wrote:
Time to turn on the charm seany, old son.
 
 
I'm usually terrible with birds but I was really confident with her and not even pi55ed. When she measured my pupils I thought she was going to kiss me.....

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Post by rIck_dAgless Wed 02 Jul 2014, 9:10 am

TiNo wrote:You never fail to make me smile, Rick.

Have a capital rep to keep...

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Post by superflyweight Wed 02 Jul 2014, 9:18 am

JuliusHMarx wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Then had a lovely 20 minute session of cutting out the non fruit bearing growth from my tomatoes with the missus. I don't think I've ever felt as close to her before.

Not quite the pottery scene from Ghost, but close.

Particularly if that description was intended as a euphemism.

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 02 Jul 2014, 9:24 am

Have you ever eaten a tomato Super? Maybe on a trip to Leeds?

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Post by rIck_dAgless Wed 02 Jul 2014, 9:34 am

Can you deep fry a tomato?

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Post by Union Cane Wed 02 Jul 2014, 9:58 am

Wasn't there a book / film about deep fried green tomatoes at the whistle stop café?

(There was, I just looked it up. The book was written by Fannie Flagg.)

Fannie Flagg!

 laughing 

Michaels should get his Mrs a Fannie Flagg, they could form a double act what with him and his bollies hanging out and her with her Fannie Flagg.
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Post by seanmichaels Wed 02 Jul 2014, 10:06 am

If she had a Fannie Flagg I may one day be able to find where it is.

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Post by Guest Wed 02 Jul 2014, 10:44 am

seanmichaels wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:
Time to turn on the charm seany, old son.
 
 
I'm usually terrible with birds but I was really confident with her and not even pi55ed. When she measured my pupils I thought she was going to kiss me.....
Here's a tip...DON'T CALL THEM 'BIRDS"
I have laser eye surgery a couple of years ago and recently went back to the opticians for a general health check. They've known me for years and yet it was great watching their faces when it appeared I'd gone from being Mr Magoo to having near 20/20 vision. Anyway, one of the females working their was examining my eyes and her breasts were pressing against me so insistently I almost thought it would be rude NOT to fondle them. Thankfully I resisted but I'm thinking of having bogus eye issues just to feel close to her again.

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 02 Jul 2014, 10:58 am

Hazel doesn't have big knockers. She's a 6ft brunette with broadish shoulders and I'd say possible a 32b. I saved her message on my phone but I haven't listened to it again since monday.....

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Post by Guest Wed 02 Jul 2014, 11:01 am

seanmichaels wrote:Jason doesn't have big knockers, he's a 6ft brunette with broadish shoulders and I'd say possible a 32b. I saved her message on my phone but I haven't listened to it again since monday.....

fixed that for ya Seany...

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Post by Union Cane Wed 02 Jul 2014, 11:03 am

Please tell me that you didn't roll one out over your thumb whilst listening to her message...
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Post by rIck_dAgless Wed 02 Jul 2014, 11:13 am

Are "DON'T CALL THEM BIRDS" A METAL band DAVE?

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 02 Jul 2014, 11:19 am

Union Cane wrote:Please tell me that you didn't roll one out over your thumb whilst listening to her message...

Nah.

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Post by rIck_dAgless Wed 02 Jul 2014, 12:36 pm

I have no idea how you do it with one single word sean...

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Post by Union Cane Wed 02 Jul 2014, 1:02 pm

I can do it with six.
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Post by JuliusHMarx Wed 02 Jul 2014, 1:09 pm

No you can't.

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Post by Union Cane Wed 02 Jul 2014, 1:13 pm

Ok, I will try five.
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Post by JuliusHMarx Wed 02 Jul 2014, 1:15 pm

It won't work Union. It's not the number of words, it's the way you say them. You just don't have sean's knack for killing off a thread.

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Post by Union Cane Wed 02 Jul 2014, 1:22 pm

He is special.
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Post by Union Cane Wed 02 Jul 2014, 1:25 pm

Heroic US goalkeeper Tim Howard wrote:None of that really matters to me. I signed up to do that, to put my face in front of balls. If I had no saves or 20 saves it doesn't mean any more or less. It hurts when we lose.

 Shocked
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Post by rIck_dAgless Wed 02 Jul 2014, 1:26 pm

http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2014/07/02/things-tim-howard-could-save_n_5550356.html?1404288572&ncid=tweetlnkushpmg00000067

Some of these Tim Howard memes are pretty funny...

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 02 Jul 2014, 1:36 pm

Chim chimeny chim chimeny chim chimery cheroo
we've got Tim Howard and he says f&*k you.....

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Post by Guest Wed 02 Jul 2014, 1:41 pm

rick_dagless wrote:Are "DON'T CALL THEM BIRDS"  A METAL band DAVE?
Yeah they're an Emo band who are all drippy, soppy and sensitive (basically a bunch of c***s).

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Post by Union Cane Wed 02 Jul 2014, 2:10 pm

Oh dear, Jock is getting stuffed.
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Post by seanmichaels Wed 02 Jul 2014, 2:22 pm

Bad summer for English sport......

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 02 Jul 2014, 2:23 pm

Spoiler:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2677200/Russian-brides-advert-Radio-Times-website-showing-woman-low-cut-bra-banned-overtly-sexual.html

Isn't Galted's missus from Russia?

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 02 Jul 2014, 2:27 pm

I'd do her if she looked like the one on the advert.

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 02 Jul 2014, 2:29 pm

seanmichaels wrote:I'd do her if she looked like the one on the advert.

I'm guessing she doesn't.

Mind the windows Tino.
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Post by seanmichaels Wed 02 Jul 2014, 2:29 pm

I think Murray is smuggling one of Rowley's ferrets

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 02 Jul 2014, 2:33 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:I'd do her if she looked like the one on the advert.

I'm guessing she doesn't.
 
You never know. Siberian women probably respect men who dress for extremes of weather and who wear shiite trainers functional footwear

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 02 Jul 2014, 2:36 pm

seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:I'd do her if she looked like the one on the advert.

I'm guessing she doesn't.
 
You never know. Siberian women probably respect men who dress for extremes of weather and who wear shiite trainers functional footwear

Did your missus buy you you buy any new trainers in the end?

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 02 Jul 2014, 2:47 pm

Is your missus colour blind?

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 02 Jul 2014, 2:52 pm

seanmichaels wrote:Is your missus colour blind?

She doesn't buy my clothes.

Mind the windows Tino.
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Post by Union Cane Wed 02 Jul 2014, 2:55 pm

seanmichaels wrote:Is your missus colour blind?

Fixed.
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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 02 Jul 2014, 2:56 pm

Union Cane wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Is your missus colour blind?

Fixed.

At least she exists.

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Post by Union Cane Wed 02 Jul 2014, 2:58 pm

Cry 
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Post by rIck_dAgless Wed 02 Jul 2014, 2:59 pm

Is Andy Murray Scottish again now?

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 02 Jul 2014, 3:00 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Is your missus colour blind?

She doesn't buy my clothes.  

Who does, Stevie Wonder?

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The Culture Cup Round 6 - new but not really improved - Page 3 Empty Re: The Culture Cup Round 6 - new but not really improved

Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 02 Jul 2014, 3:01 pm

rick_dagless wrote:Is Andy Murray Scottish again now?

I am going to have so much fun winding my arl man up if Murray loses this match.

Mind the windows Tino.
Beano
Beano

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Location : Outside there's a box car waiting, outside the family stew. Out by the fire breathing, outside we wait till face turns blue. I know the nervous walking, I know the dirty beard hangs. Out by the box car waiting, take me away to nowhere plans. There is a wait so long (so long, so long). You'll never wait so long. Here comes Julius. Here comes Julius. Here comes Julius.

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The Culture Cup Round 6 - new but not really improved - Page 3 Empty Re: The Culture Cup Round 6 - new but not really improved

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