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The Culture Cup Round 6 - new but not really improved

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Post by kingraf Tue 15 Jul 2014, 11:23 am

First topic message reminder :

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:Insects, anyone?

Cooking tips?

Action netball?

I don't play action netball!!
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Post by Rowley Tue 22 Jul 2014, 4:55 pm

Union Cane wrote:Grimsby Town legend Terrell Forbes?

Terrell Ferrell.

That would have to be a gay wedding though, which may be frowned upon in some circles.

Grimsby being one of them.

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Post by superflyweight Tue 22 Jul 2014, 4:56 pm

Union Cane wrote:
Unconvincing Scotsman wrote:“It was about two to three inches long and had a massive sting about the length of a needle."

Well was it two inches long, or three? A needle, how long is a needle? Is that a knitting needle? Cleopatra's Needle? A nonsense story.


"Unconvincing Scotsman" may have been what Strongy was calling me yesterday when he said I was a "faux Scot". Hard to tell though because he writes like a real Irishman.

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Post by Union Cane Tue 22 Jul 2014, 5:03 pm

Perhaps Will is a polygamous Arab, in which case he could marry them all at once.

It might look like this...

Terrell, Beryl, Ferrell, Cheryl & Meryl:
The Culture Cup Round 6 - new but not really improved - Page 11 Willte10
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Post by Rowley Tue 22 Jul 2014, 5:16 pm

superflyweight wrote:
Union Cane wrote:
Unconvincing Scotsman wrote:“It was about two to three inches long and had a massive sting about the length of a needle."

Well was it two inches long, or three? A needle, how long is a needle? Is that a knitting needle? Cleopatra's Needle? A nonsense story.


"Unconvincing Scotsman" may have been what Strongy was calling me yesterday when he said I was a "faux Scot".  Hard to tell though because he writes like a real Irishman.  

I suspect he was ensuring he was not open to accusations of pseudo intellectualism by not actually understanding what faux meant. Or would using the word without actually understanding it make such accusations more valid? T'is a vexing old affair.

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Post by Union Cane Tue 22 Jul 2014, 5:17 pm

* 'Tis


Last edited by Union Cane on Tue 22 Jul 2014, 5:23 pm; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : An unneccessary correction, hereby rescinded due to Jeff being right.)
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Post by Rowley Tue 22 Jul 2014, 5:20 pm

Union Cane wrote:* 'Tis

I was truncating this is, as such my grammar was perfectly correct.

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Post by Union Cane Tue 22 Jul 2014, 5:22 pm

Rowley wrote:
Union Cane wrote:* 'Tis

I was truncating this is, as such my grammar was perfectly correct.

I am willing to believe you.
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Post by Rowley Tue 22 Jul 2014, 5:25 pm

Union Cane wrote:
Rowley wrote:
Union Cane wrote:* 'Tis

I was truncating this is, as such my grammar was perfectly correct.

I am willing to believe you.

Thank god for that, as I am sure you can appreciate I was on tenterhooks.

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Post by Union Cane Tue 22 Jul 2014, 5:28 pm

*tenderhooks
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Post by Rowley Tue 22 Jul 2014, 5:45 pm

on tenterhooks, in a state of uneasy suspense or painful anxiety: The movie keeps one on tenterhooks until the very last moment.

Source - http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/tenterhooks

Secondary Source - http://www.quickanddirtytips.com/education/grammar/tenterhooks-or-tenderhooks

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Post by ShahenshahG Tue 22 Jul 2014, 6:05 pm

Rowley wrote:on tenterhooks, in a state of uneasy suspense or painful anxiety: The movie keeps one on tenterhooks until the very last moment.

Source - http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/tenterhooks

Secondary Source - http://www.quickanddirtytips.com/education/grammar/tenterhooks-or-tenderhooks
Union is americanised next he will call titbits tidbits and ditchwater - dishwater

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Post by Galted Tue 22 Jul 2014, 10:48 pm

JuliusHMarx wrote:So you'd prefer something artificially flavoured to taste like strawberry, instead of real strawberry, to go with your artificially-flavoured-to-taste-like-strawberry ice cream?

If you moved to Yorkshire you could use your £3.50 to buy your own ice cream factory.


Had some strawberries for pudding tonight, Julius. Whole strawberries with nothing added, they were delicious. Ruddy delicious. Ruddy f*cking delicious. I don't understand how someone could chop them up and medley them with ice-cream.

Ruddy bloody f*cking delicious.
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Post by Pal Joey Wed 23 Jul 2014, 5:57 am

Thirsty

I'm into this "3 Berries" ice cream at the moment.

- the raspberry has a slight twang to it - very nice.
- the middle bit is that perfect strawberry flavour.
- the vanilla compliments the other two berries very well too.

Hang on - that's only 2 Berries. Ripped off!

Unless vanilla comes from a berry? I've always considered it a spice. I may be wrong there though.
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Post by superflyweight Wed 23 Jul 2014, 7:43 am

Sicond.

I had a strawberry cheesecake ice cream cone yesterday evening. Only one kind of berry in it (strawberry, if you have to ask). It was very good, but in a way I kind of envied my daughter's simple vanilla cone which had it's own spartan beauty.

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Post by ShahenshahG Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:11 am

Fat Kumquat

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:12 am

superflyweight wrote:Sicond.  

I had a strawberry cheesecake ice cream cone yesterday evening.  Only one kind of berry in it (strawberry, if you have to ask).  It was very good, but in a way I kind of envied my daughter's simple vanilla cone which had it's own spartan beauty.  

I didn't have any ice cream last night.  I did, however, push various fruits and berries into the bum of a lingerie model who has been stalking me for months.

Mind the windows Tino.
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Post by superflyweight Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:21 am

Yeah, lingerie models are known to go mad for d!ckheads wearing snazzy Next jumper and shirt combos.

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Post by superflyweight Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:22 am

superflyweight wrote:Yeah, lingerie models are known to go mad for d!ckheads wearing snazzy Next jumper and shirt combos.  

and bog off Shah.

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:22 am

superflyweight wrote:
superflyweight wrote:Yeah, lingerie models are known to go mad for d!ckheads wearing snazzy Next jumper and shirt combos.  

and bog off Shah.  

Fat c*nt.

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:26 am

I had dinner with Alyssa Sutherland.

Spoiler:
The Culture Cup Round 6 - new but not really improved - Page 11 000000067755-Alyssa_Sutherland-squaremedium


Last edited by seanmichaels on Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:28 am; edited 1 time in total

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:28 am

can't post pictures these days....

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Post by superflyweight Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:28 am

"Why don’t we call him fatty fatty toad boy if we’re- you know at least start on him then move on… Mr. Toad, I can’t…"

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:29 am

works now....

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:29 am

superflyweight wrote:"Why don’t we call him fatty fatty toad boy if we’re- you know at least start on him then move on… Mr. Toad, I can’t…"

 Laugh 

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:30 am

seanmichaels wrote:works now....

Where did you get that picture of TIMC from?

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:32 am

"Birds instead of women, poofs instead of gays, darkies instead of..... coloureds"

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:33 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:works now....

Where did you get that picture of TIMC from?

She is quite stunning isn't she? Google her.

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:35 am

Gareth wrote:Come round, look at my CDs. You'll see Queen, George Michael, Pet Shop Boys. They're all bummers.

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:35 am

seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:works now....

Where did you get that picture of TIMC from?

She is quite stunning isn't she? Google her.

Already have. I don't need a sicond invitation, Seany.

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:40 am

:Laugh:

Brent wrote: People see me, and they see the suit, and they go: "you're not fooling anyone", they know I'm rock and roll through and through. But you know that old thing, live fast, die young? Not my way. Live fast, sure, live too bloody fast sometimes, but die young? Die old. That's the way- not orthodox, I don't live by "the rules" you know. And if there's one other person who's influenced me in that way I think, someone who is a maverick, someone who does that to the system, then, it's Ian Botham. Because Beefy will happily say "that's what I think of your selection policy, yes I've hit the odd copper, yes I've enjoyed the old dooby, but will you urine off and leave me alone, I'm walking to John O'Groats for some spastics."

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Post by Rowley Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:50 am

If you had not nailed it to the perch it would be pushing up daisies.

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:52 am

Old Skool.

Is that to tempt Jules out?

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Post by Rowley Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:54 am

To curry favour with Jules by gently mocking the quoting of famous comedy shows. I know how much contempt he holds these things in.

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Post by Rowley Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:57 am

Don't spell it skool Tina. You're neither young or a moron, as such your excuses for doing so are pretty much exhausted.

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Post by JuliusHMarx Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:57 am

Swordfish

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:58 am

Rowley wrote:Don't spell it skool Tina. You're neither young or a moron, as such your excuses for doing so are pretty much exhausted.

I am not young, that is true.

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Post by superflyweight Wed 23 Jul 2014, 8:59 am

Rowley wrote:To curry favour with Jules by gently mocking the quoting of famous comedy shows. I know how much contempt he holds these things in.

"This isn't in the rulebook! Who's in charge here?" "Guilty! Get a new rulebook! Alright?"

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 23 Jul 2014, 9:00 am

superflyweight wrote:
Rowley wrote:To curry favour with Jules by gently mocking the quoting of famous comedy shows. I know how much contempt he holds these things in.

"This isn't in the rulebook! Who's in charge here?" "Guilty! Get a new rulebook! Alright?"

"You've been under attack for days, there's a soldier down, he's wounded, gangrene's setting in, 'who's used all the penicillin?' 'Oh, Mark Paxon sir, he's got knobrot off some tart"

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Post by Union Cane Wed 23 Jul 2014, 9:02 am

"Ah, good afternoon, sir; and how are we today?"

"Better."

"Better?"

"Better get a bucket, I'm gonna throw up."


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Post by seanmichaels Wed 23 Jul 2014, 9:08 am

Old Enoch's against it, in't 'e, eh? He don't want no more bloody foreigners over here. We got enough bloody foreigners here as it is. Bloody country's swarming with Eities and Krauts and Froggies and Spagnollies and Brussel Sprouts. All coming over here and taking our jobs off of us, aren't they?

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Post by JuliusHMarx Wed 23 Jul 2014, 9:09 am

music
"This is the theme to Garry's show,
The opening theme to Garry's show
Garry called me up and asked if I would write his theme song"
music


Last edited by JuliusHMarx on Wed 23 Jul 2014, 9:09 am; edited 1 time in total

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 23 Jul 2014, 9:09 am

seanmichaels wrote:Old Enoch's against it, in't 'e, eh? He don't want no more bloody foreigners over here. We got enough bloody foreigners here as it is. Bloody country's swarming with Eities and Krauts and Froggies and Spagnollies and Brussel Sprouts. All coming over here and taking our jobs off of us, aren't they?

Lumbering Jack?

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 23 Jul 2014, 9:09 am

I love you, Adam.

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Post by Rowley Wed 23 Jul 2014, 9:11 am

He is softening you up before he hits you with the Prince Phillip badge.

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 23 Jul 2014, 9:12 am

Rowley wrote:He is softening you up before he hits you with the Prince Phillip badge.

He isn't nearly as vindictive as you.

Mind the windows Tino.
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Location : Outside there's a box car waiting, outside the family stew. Out by the fire breathing, outside we wait till face turns blue. I know the nervous walking, I know the dirty beard hangs. Out by the box car waiting, take me away to nowhere plans. There is a wait so long (so long, so long). You'll never wait so long. Here comes Julius. Here comes Julius. Here comes Julius.

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Post by JuliusHMarx Wed 23 Jul 2014, 9:15 am

You'll always be a Gimp to me Tino.

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Post by Adam D Wed 23 Jul 2014, 9:16 am

JuliusHMarx wrote:music
"This is the theme to Garry's show,
The opening theme to Garry's show
Garry called me up and asked if I would write his theme song"
music

I used to love the Garry Shandling show.

I'm almost half way through it,
what do you think of it so far?

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 23 Jul 2014, 9:16 am

JuliusHMarx wrote:You'll always be a Gimp to me Tino.

As long as I am something to you, that makes me happy.

Mind the windows Tino.
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Join date : 2011-05-13
Location : Outside there's a box car waiting, outside the family stew. Out by the fire breathing, outside we wait till face turns blue. I know the nervous walking, I know the dirty beard hangs. Out by the box car waiting, take me away to nowhere plans. There is a wait so long (so long, so long). You'll never wait so long. Here comes Julius. Here comes Julius. Here comes Julius.

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Post by Union Cane Wed 23 Jul 2014, 9:17 am

The naughty word filter might ruin this, but here goes...

Isn't it awfully nice to have a Winkle?
Isn't it frightfully good to have a dong?
It's swell to have a stiffy.
It's divine to own a dick,
From the tiniest little tadger
To the world's biggest Tinkywinky.
So, three cheers for your Willy or John Thomas.
Hooray for your one-eyed trouser snake,
Your piece of pork, your wife's best friend,
Your Percy, or your man sausage.
You can wrap it up in ribbons.
You can slip it in your sock,
But don't take it out in public,
Or they will stick you in the dock,
And you won't come back.
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Post by JuliusHMarx Wed 23 Jul 2014, 9:19 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:You'll always be a Gimp to me Tino.

As long as I am something to you, that makes me happy.

You're everything and nothing.

JuliusHMarx
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The Culture Cup Round 6 - new but not really improved - Page 11 Empty Re: The Culture Cup Round 6 - new but not really improved

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