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The Culture Cup Round x - Adam is a naughty naughty boy

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Post by kingraf Tue 16 Sep 2014, 1:47 pm

First topic message reminder :

Headed to the dam this weekend. God I've missed it. Girlfriend's never been and I'm undecided on whether to take her or not.
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Post by JuliusHMarx Wed 17 Sep 2014, 10:40 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:I got completely smashed at my wedding.

Couldn't even consummate the marriage.  Think my best man might have done it for me, but I can't remember.

No, it wasn't the best man thumbsup

If it had to anyone, Jules, it would be an honour if it was you.

Perhaps that's why my first born smokes a pipe and speaks Latin.  

Pipes & Latin? It wasn't only me then.

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 17 Sep 2014, 10:42 am

JuliusHMarx wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:I got completely smashed at my wedding.

Couldn't even consummate the marriage.  Think my best man might have done it for me, but I can't remember.

No, it wasn't the best man thumbsup

If it had to anyone, Jules, it would be an honour if it was you.

Perhaps that's why my first born smokes a pipe and speaks Latin.  

Pipes & Latin? It wasn't only me then.

Good God, it wasn't Jeff as well was it?

vomit

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 17 Sep 2014, 11:47 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:


Good God, it wasn't Jeff as well was it?

vomit

Does he read the Guardian and vote Liberal?

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 17 Sep 2014, 12:14 pm

seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:


Good God, it wasn't Jeff as well was it?

vomit

Does he read the Guardian and vote Liberal?

No, but he makes a "conscious effort to listen to jazz" and enjoys a relaxing bath.

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Post by Rowley Wed 17 Sep 2014, 12:18 pm

I vote labour Sean, always have.

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Post by JuliusHMarx Wed 17 Sep 2014, 12:23 pm

Jeff, sorry to hear that your holiday is so rubbish you've resorted to posting on here in an effort to entertain yourself.
Unless you're not on holiday - I don't really pay attention to your posts.

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Post by Rowley Wed 17 Sep 2014, 12:39 pm

Shopping with TSMR Jules, killing time whilst she decides between two seemingly identical handbags.

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 17 Sep 2014, 1:02 pm

Are you still darn sarf Jeff?

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Post by kingraf Wed 17 Sep 2014, 1:07 pm

Had a splendid round of golf on the office PlayStation this morning. It's permeated a glow on me which everybody can see. My best friend also texted me to tell me she's pregnant. I'm gonna be a Godfather
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Post by kingraf Wed 17 Sep 2014, 1:14 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:I got completely smashed at my wedding.

Couldn't even consummate the marriage.  Think my best man might have done it for me, but I can't remember.

No, it wasn't the best man thumbsup

If it had to anyone, Jules, it would be an honour if it was you.

Perhaps that's why my first born smokes a pipe and speaks Latin.

Can anyone actually speak Latin?
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Post by rIck_dAgless Wed 17 Sep 2014, 1:17 pm

Raf wrote:Can anyone actually speak Latin?

People from Latia...

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 17 Sep 2014, 1:17 pm

kingraf wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:I got completely smashed at my wedding.

Couldn't even consummate the marriage.  Think my best man might have done it for me, but I can't remember.

No, it wasn't the best man thumbsup

If it had to anyone, Jules, it would be an honour if it was you.

Perhaps that's why my first born smokes a pipe and speaks Latin.  

Can anyone actually speak Latin?  

Etiam Julius potest. Et frequenter facit. Julius amo.

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 17 Sep 2014, 1:21 pm

Amo Cider

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Post by rIck_dAgless Wed 17 Sep 2014, 1:28 pm

vidi vici vini - how sean want to operate...

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 17 Sep 2014, 1:30 pm

Carpe diem.

What approximately 93% of premiership wendyballers have tattooed somewhere on their body.

D*ckheads.

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 17 Sep 2014, 1:42 pm

I'm loving the likes of John Redwood crawling out of the woodwork calling for an English referendum.

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Post by rIck_dAgless Wed 17 Sep 2014, 1:43 pm

sean wrote:I'm loving the likes of John Redwood crawling out of the woodwork calling for an English referendum.

A man solely remembered for his total inability to sing the Welsh anthem...

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 17 Sep 2014, 1:48 pm

Why are they wheeling Gordon Brown out? How is that going to help anything?

Anyone know the potential pitfalls for England in the result of a yes vote? Presumably we lose the oil but surely that will be offset by tuition fees NHS etc?

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 17 Sep 2014, 1:52 pm

seanmichaels wrote:Why are they wheeling Gordon Brown out? How is that going to help anything?

Anyone know the potential pitfalls for England in the result of a yes vote? Presumably we lose the oil but surely that will be offset by tuition fees NHS etc?

If they vote yes, we can just invade them again like we used to do for a hobby.

We can all have a go on superfly's wife as part of our feudal rights.

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Post by rIck_dAgless Wed 17 Sep 2014, 1:53 pm

sean wrote:Anyone know the potential pitfalls for England in the result of a yes vote? Presumably we lose the oil but surely that will be offset by tuition fees NHS etc?

Depends on whose argument you look at, and I could bore you senseless with Barnett formulae, expenditure per head, rights over oil fields and imaginary sea lines and other such gubbins, but the fact is that no one really knows for sure, and both sides claim they definitely do.

There will definitely be up and down sides depending on negotiations for the rest of the U.K, of that we can be sure...

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 17 Sep 2014, 1:58 pm

I consider myself English more so than British. I'd quite like to see the Jocks depart. They don't have any decent sportsman other than Murray and can't contribute to the Lions without a few tokens.

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Post by rIck_dAgless Wed 17 Sep 2014, 1:59 pm

Most of the Sportsfolk will go where the funding is...

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 17 Sep 2014, 1:59 pm

rick_dagless wrote:
sean wrote:Anyone know the potential pitfalls for England in the result of a yes vote? Presumably we lose the oil but surely that will be offset by tuition fees NHS etc?

Depends on whose argument you look at, and I could bore you senseless with Barnett formulae, expenditure per head, rights over oil fields and imaginary sea lines and other such gubbins, but the fact is that no one really knows for sure, and both sides claim they definitely do.

There will definitely be up and down sides depending on negotiations for the rest of the U.K, of that we can be sure...

So can we have a go on superfly's wife or not?

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Post by superflyweight Wed 17 Sep 2014, 2:00 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Why are they wheeling Gordon Brown out? How is that going to help anything?

Anyone know the potential pitfalls for England in the result of a yes vote? Presumably we lose the oil but surely that will be offset by tuition fees NHS etc?

If they vote yes, we can just invade them again like we used to do for a hobby.

We can all have a go on superfly's wife as part of our feudal rights.

Good luck with that. She'd batter the lot of you senseless - particularly if fighting in the traditional Highland style - bare breasted and carrying an 8lb baby.

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Post by rIck_dAgless Wed 17 Sep 2014, 2:01 pm

Tino wrote:So can we have a go on superfly's wife or not?

If no then Droit du seigneur is in place

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 17 Sep 2014, 2:02 pm

Having said that, I find it quite a turn on the way scots women say p3n1s. Used to do quite a successful Jock (high flier in canary wharf). Did some wierd sheeet in bed until she dumped me.

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Post by superflyweight Wed 17 Sep 2014, 2:18 pm

seanmichaels wrote:Having said that, I find it quite a turn on the way scots women say p3n1s. Used to do quite a successful Jock (high flier in canary wharf). Did some wierd sheeet in bed until she dumped me.

Oh Gran, what have you done?

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 17 Sep 2014, 2:21 pm

Nah she was younger than me. I was quite smitten for a while. She came from Fort William. Shes was the 3rd bird to dump me in just over 6 months.

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Post by rIck_dAgless Wed 17 Sep 2014, 2:21 pm

super wrote:Oh Gran, what have you done?

Invented a flying pedalbike/helicopter hybrid?

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Post by superflyweight Wed 17 Sep 2014, 2:28 pm

Brilliant, Rick.

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 17 Sep 2014, 2:41 pm

seanmichaels wrote:Nah she was younger than me. I was quite smitten for a while. She came from Fort William. Shes was the 3rd bird to dump me in just over 6 months.

What was the reason for the dumpings?

Was it your tiny c*ck?

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 17 Sep 2014, 2:49 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Nah she was younger than me. I was quite smitten for a while. She came from Fort William. Shes was the 3rd bird to dump me in just over 6 months.

What was the reason for the dumpings?

Was it your tiny c*ck?

No, it isn't tiny, ask Shah.

Not sure really. 1st one went off with a pikey, 24hr bird went off with a pikey, and the Jock is still single as far as I am aware.

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Post by Rowley Wed 17 Sep 2014, 3:07 pm

Am only guessing as to why she dumped you, but using terms like when I was doing a jock may have been a factor.

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 17 Sep 2014, 3:10 pm

seanmichaels wrote:Used to do quite a successful Jock.

Did she look like Paul Scholes?

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 17 Sep 2014, 3:13 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Used to do quite a successful Jock.

Did she look like Paul Scholes?

No. I once snogged a bird at uni who looked like Peter Beardsley though.

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 17 Sep 2014, 3:14 pm

bloody hell. the rugger boys take on the referendum is a little more in depth than the culture cup's....

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 17 Sep 2014, 3:34 pm

seanmichaels wrote:bloody hell. the rugger boys take on the referendum is a little more in depth than the culture cup's....

More in depth than whether or not we can hang out the back of superfly's wife?

I can't believe it is.

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 17 Sep 2014, 3:50 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:bloody hell. the rugger boys take on the referendum is a little more in depth than the culture cup's....

More in depth than whether or not we can hang out the back of superfly's wife?  

I can't believe it is.

A bit deeper. Something along the lines of whether or not we can hang out the back of superfly's wife wearing a kermit the frog green shirt and jersey / combo or khaki shorts with multiple pockets.

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 17 Sep 2014, 3:53 pm

seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:bloody hell. the rugger boys take on the referendum is a little more in depth than the culture cup's....

More in depth than whether or not we can hang out the back of superfly's wife?  

I can't believe it is.

A bit deeper. Something along the lines of whether or not we can hang out the back of superfly's wife wearing a kermit the frog green shirt and jersey / combo or khaki shorts with multiple pockets.

That would be superfly's worst nightmare. Coming home from work to find me and Galted spit-roasting his wife.

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 17 Sep 2014, 3:58 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:bloody hell. the rugger boys take on the referendum is a little more in depth than the culture cup's....

More in depth than whether or not we can hang out the back of superfly's wife?  

I can't believe it is.

A bit deeper. Something along the lines of whether or not we can hang out the back of superfly's wife wearing a kermit the frog green shirt and jersey / combo or khaki shorts with multiple pockets.

That would be superfly's worst nightmare.  Coming home from work to find me and Galted spit-roasting his wife.

Whilst Jules watches smoking his pipe (his, not superfly's).

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 17 Sep 2014, 4:00 pm

seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:bloody hell. the rugger boys take on the referendum is a little more in depth than the culture cup's....

More in depth than whether or not we can hang out the back of superfly's wife?  

I can't believe it is.

A bit deeper. Something along the lines of whether or not we can hang out the back of superfly's wife wearing a kermit the frog green shirt and jersey / combo or khaki shorts with multiple pockets.

That would be superfly's worst nightmare.  Coming home from work to find me and Galted spit-roasting his wife.

Whilst Jules watches smoking his pipe (his, not superfly's).

He runs upstairs in floods of tears, only to find a naked Jeff clambering into his bath.

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 17 Sep 2014, 4:01 pm

Laugh

Radox?

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 17 Sep 2014, 4:02 pm

seanmichaels wrote:Laugh

Radox?

Yep, he brought some with him.

Mind the windows Tino.
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Post by superflyweight Wed 17 Sep 2014, 4:08 pm

You lot have completely underestimated the full extent of the horrors I experience in my nightmares.

Still, the image of a paunchy Cliff Richard and Ray Mears spit-roasting Mrs Superfly is one that's going to linger.

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Post by Galted Wed 17 Sep 2014, 5:37 pm

superflyweight wrote:You lot have completely underestimated the full extent of the horrors I experience in my nightmares.  

Still, the image of a paunchy Cliff Richard and Ray Mears spit-roasting Mrs Superfly is one that's going to linger.  

This is the only scenario in which I'm ok with being likened to Ray Mears.

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Post by Galted Wed 17 Sep 2014, 5:57 pm

littleswannygirl wrote:
Galted wrote:
Rowley wrote:Evening Galted. No wonder Sean is weird growing up round here, is like Royston Vasey for rich people. Can understand why he is a borderline sex pest as well. He probably did not see a female who was not a family member until he was 20.

I should have gone to London, I could have gone to the imperial war museum. I love you Galted and will never go against your advice again

Evening Jeff.  Thought of you today when I saw Sheffield on a station information board but then I remembered that you're from Rotherham.

Sheffield is the epicentre of The North. Any other claims to that title are preposterous, delusional or merely clutching at purely accidental geographical proximity. Rotherham's not bad, but it did give the world the Chuckle Brothers. Please keep that distinction alive.

Cheers, swanny, my gathering of knowledge of the north continues.

I had a trip up north last weekend to get a taster of what it's like, to a place called Piccadilly Circus.  Some of the folks there looked like me but most of them looked the sort of people who play the Cong in those films about Vietnam.  Was ok.  Didn't understand what they were saying but that's because I was listening to my iPod and couldn't hear them.

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Post by Galted Wed 17 Sep 2014, 6:04 pm

seanmichaels wrote:What is worse, Galted's Ray Mears look or Windows' John Craven look?

Bog off michaels.

Galtova bought a Scrabble set on the weekend. Going to use your "spells disaster" joke tonight, but will tell her the cat's swallowed them. Will let you know how it turns out.

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Post by Galted Wed 17 Sep 2014, 9:18 pm

Galted wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:What is worse, Galted's Ray Mears look or Windows' John Craven look?

Bog off michaels.

Galtova bought a Scrabble set on the weekend.  Going to use your "spells disaster" joke tonight, but will tell her the cat's swallowed them.  Will let you know how it turns out.

Went down pretty well though I f*cked it up a bit by laughing.

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Post by seanmichaels Wed 17 Sep 2014, 9:23 pm

Galted wrote:
Galted wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:What is worse, Galted's Ray Mears look or Windows' John Craven look?

Bog off michaels.

Galtova bought a Scrabble set on the weekend.  Going to use your "spells disaster" joke tonight, but will tell her the cat's swallowed them.  Will let you know how it turns out.

Went down pretty well though I f*cked it up a bit by laughing.

Galtova plays scrabble? How's your phone search going? I have some good drunken stories to tell from the past few weeks. You get online and I'll share them.

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Post by Galted Wed 17 Sep 2014, 10:41 pm

Galtova does play Scrabble. 2-0 to me so far, would've been 3-0 but she lost the plot last time round as she couldn't handle me executing my skill-sets and remaining calm under pressure. Phone search isn't going, more of a job search which isn't really going either. What if I just give you money to hear your drunken stories? You should try to get them published. Julius and Tino could help you if you need anything quoted.

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