Friday humor - Bakkies Botha "The Enforcer"

If you thought Chuck Norris or George north was tough and intimidating, then read this.

Bakkies Botha is so strong he can tear a page out of Facebook

Bakkies Botha doesn't dial the wrong number, you are picking up the wrong phone.

Bakkies Botha has already been to Mars, that's why there are no signs of life.

Bakkies Botha can strangle you with a cordless phone.

Death once had a near-Bakkies Botha experience.

Bakkies Botha doesn't need a GPS. Bakkies Botha decides where he is.

The sheep on Bakkies Botha's farm are the ones that give us steel wool.

Bakkies Botha will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.

Bakkies Botha can speak Braille.

When Bakkies Botha throws a boomerang it doesn't dare come back.

Bakkies Botha does not fart, nothing escapes Bakkies Botha.

Bakkies Botha can tweet from a pay phone.

When Alexander Graham Bell designed the phone, there were three missed calls from Bakkies Botha.

The Vredefort dome was not created by a meteorite, Bakkies Botha decided to put his foot down.

When Bakkies botha pours milk on his rice crispies, they don't snap, crackle or pop.

The first thing Bakkies Botha does when he gets to the sea, is swim two lengths.

Now you know why he is "THE ENFORCER"

So has he recovered from that injury then?

What injury? He doesn't get injured, he decided who WILL play.

Bakkies could beat Wales on their day

Bakkies gets frustrated when rugby is interrupting his street fighting match

Peter Seabiscuit Wheeler wrote:Bakkies could beat Wales on their day

Bakkies Botha, a poor mans Manu Tuilagi.

yappysnap wrote:Bakkies Botha, a poor mans Manu Tuilagi.

Tuilagi is his side kick, you will never hear Tuilagi dis Botha

Santa Claus leaves milk and cookies out for Bakkies Botha

Baby monsters are told Bakkies is waiting for them under their beds....................

Bakkies was invited to CERN to fill the role of a headon collider

Bloody Mary chickened out of saying "Bakkies Botha" three times into a mirror at midnight.

The Stig is scared of Bakkies Botha

Unless he is the Stig? Who knows?

If George North and Bakkies Botha met on a rugby field the force of impact between them would kill everyone in the surrounding 50 mile radius. (Thats why Bakkies was 'injured' only to return this week - George North won the coin toss)

In space, Bakkies Botha can hear you scream.

wales606 wrote:If George North and Bakkies Botha met on a rugby field the force of impact between them would kill everyone in the surrounding 50 mile radius. (Thats why Bakkies was 'injured' only to return this week - George North won the coin toss)

Yeah, it will be the same impact as splitting an atom in an uncontrolled environment. The energy released by such an impact could power the world for 1000 years.

Knowsit17 wrote:In space, Bakkies Botha can hear you scream.

Good one, Sir.

A little off topic but still a gem.

This is what Bakkies said after he got banned for 'headbutting' Cown last year.

"I can't get too involved in lashing out or punishing the guy on the opposition who is perhaps killing the ball, or throwing himself about a bit. After all: if you wish to experience peace, provide peace for another. I tried to share that bit of wisdom with Victor Matfield last week but he just called me a big girl and told me to 'man up'."

Victor Matfield.... the man who tells Bakkies Botha to man up! Legend.

Most likely the only person Bakkies will listen to.

"Definitely I'll still feel a little bit of stiffness but it's like old farm vehicles in the morning," said the 75-test veteran. "It smokes a bit when you drive it around for half an hour then it's hot and it will go. So hopefully everything will run smoothly for me."

Mrs Botha must be chuffed to bits