Trevose - Notes from the Harbinger

Landed on a strange, sequestred planet called Newquay Anno Domini 06/10/2011 at 7:20pm. Life forms seem friendly. Female of species quite chatty. Couldn't comprehend a word of fellow on reception, but helped me with my bag as I struggled with golf kit up Victorian stairs. Have head like small planet and mouth like Ghandi's flip-flops after meeting up with the one we call 'JAS' and consuming strange Mexican food whiile quaffing several beverages and several more at hostelry where people (who think they can sing) stand up in room - 'openmic' they call it, whispering 'Icundothis, Icundothis, gissusago' only to stand in front of room and promptly forget most of words. The one we call 'JAS' was lured by pretty maiden on guitar and sang some of words to 'Summer of 69' - I think this was deliberate ploy to gain 'respeck' from aliens with strange markings on body stood nearby.

Today we play 'Stenedoc' which one we call JAS says is the 'daddy doon heeyer'. Prospects not looking good - handicap high, terrain difficult, wind horizontal, head throbbing'. Phaser is set to stun - I'm going in for brekkie....

have agood day boys, looks like Red Bull for you all day shanks and a bit of red ring after the mex scoff. What planet is JAS from though, he doesn't seem to work, just tours up and down the UK playing golf and crooning

Luring pretty young maiden with guitar was mission difficult. But we don't do mission difficult do we Ethan, today we will play St Enodoc in a 4 club wind and try to survive....this message will self destruct in 5 seconds!!

Jas & Co

I don't want to spoil your day but after a week of cr@p we have one of those beautiful still Autumn days up here.
Big Barry rated the course called stenodoc as the best in the west [England of course]

Play well and enjoy it it all ends at 11020180

Doc

Jas is the messenger.

Doon the Water wrote:Doc

Jas is the messenger.

Doon just have this picture of him sitting at bus stations wearing a stetson and carrying his golf bag, with a guitar on his back.

JAS wrote:Luring pretty young maiden with guitar was mission difficult. But we don't do mission difficult do we Ethan, today we will play St Enodoc in a 4 club wind and try to survive....this message will self destruct in 5 seconds!!

Just a light breeze for St Enodoc then. I've played it off the blue tees in a 15 club wind which is pretty tough when you only have 14 clubs in your bag

Have fun...... the locals seem a bit strange down there but once you realise that they don't mind (unless you buy them an extra pint of White Lightening) they are a pretty sound species. Even though I am in Myrtle Beach in glorious weather and about to go for breakfast then a 1pm tee time, I'm jealous of you guys playing St Enodoc.

God I love that golf course

Captain's log (the third I've had today, Guinness will do that to you). I survived St Enodoc and JAS' khamikaze driving to and fro the course. I was slightly suspicious when he went for the red bandana prior to race-tuning his Honda engine before we set out. What an intimidating first hole - it was like being interviewed by Dragon's Den or discovering Super has been allocated as your personal trainer and your surname rhymes with Dowry! It beat us both up pretty badly today, eyes running, nose running, ball running 18 feet past the hole. JAS had a good front and I held me own on the back (well I might as well have played with me d!ck on the front nine) with 3 consecutive pars - get in!

Time to hit the scratcher and let my kamikhazi Wing Man work his magic tonight. Here's hoping we meet the lush guitarist from last night, we've both agreed to offer to drink her bath water through a straw should situation demand it. Ahh well time to sign off in party town - we have 9 holes at the more benign Trevose tomorrow as a precursor to 36 there on Sunday. Burnham and Berrow on monday to finish off a boozy, carousey 606 weekend

Aye...and the Kamikaze driving didn't stop when I got out the car either did it??not a good day at the office for JAS but hey ho... Best to get the crap out the way first and save the good stuff for Sunday!!

NST
When you play B&B remind Jaz that Howeller had a hole in one at the big dog leg par four, 14th ?? . Astonishing shot

Last time I played B&B it was so windy you could just make the fairway on the 1st with a good drive. Played mixed with my daughter and told her that if we break 90 we will have played well. We had a 93 and finished 3rd scratch.

Cheers Doon.
Captains log stardate 08/10/2011 1330-ish. I have strong suspicions that the one known as JAS maybe an alien life form or quite possibly the 's progeny sent to planet earth to lure weak-willed 606 golfers into nights of drunken debauchery. How else can I explain the downing of jager bombs and other such deadly concoctions just so he could look down the young serving wench's top. Today we practice at Trevose as a preamble to 36 holer tomorrow. I have informed the one known as JAS he must behave tonight, there will be no dwarf-throwing jager bombs - I feel it may be like hurding cats

Captains Log stardate 9.10.11.. Well the one called Noshanking has made a good start in his new role as a caddying lifeform. All his cosmic powers were focussed into preventing The one called JAS from chasing JaegerBomb touting wenches a 2nd night in a row. Will that make the one called JAS make a better fist of the 14000+ yards today. we shall see.

Good practice session yesterday followed by 9 holes, some good play and a couple of reminders of what not to do!!

The one called Drive4show is following this thread with much amusement, looking forward to hearing the outcome after said 14,000 yards.

You should have your own tales to tell as well D4S - sat as you are at Myrtle Beach (far away in time - no that's echo beach isn't it).

It's now 14.18 Greenwich mean time soon to be Paris Nuclear time and I suspect the one called JAS is about at the 9571 yard mark, with his faithful Passepartout lurching behind (I assume NST is carrying and not actually playing).

It will be hard work today, especially after all of that England Rugby team behaviour - sorry George, still don't agree with you - but that warm glow in the tummy might be attributed to good golf, or possibly the Glanfarclas that JAS carries for emergencies.

Hope it went well lads.

Blown to bits with a wide selection of 3 off the tee's to see me in the bottom 10 % of those that competed. Not a single birdie in 36 holes. Horizontal drizzle in the morning and horizontal without the drizzle in afternoon. The one called Noshanking also had plenty opportunity to practice his bunker raking skills.

So took a night off chasing drunken wenches so that I'd be prepared for today....a 94 and a 91 suggest that I should just have gone out and enjoyed Newquay at it's debaucherous best anyway....speaking of which....laters potaters!!

Good evening NST and Jas. Sorry I did not get to see you whilst out on the old Trevose links today, was too busy trying to keep hunkered down behind any protection I could find most of this mornings round. Going along quite nicely with a few pars interspersed with a few bogeys until in the AM Round snap hooked 2 balls OB on the same hole. 2nd only just out behind the stake and could not be arsed to walk back the 250 yards back to the tee in that driving drizzle so nr'd this morning! Afternoon was a tail of two nines. Couldn't get off the bogey train on the front nine and some how managed to quad the short 8th to hit the turn 11 over. Back nine shot 37 with a 3 putt on 18. Think I had only just dried out for the last 9 holes, that's my excuse. Shame about the weather, it's such a great track when the suns shining. Safe trip back to civilisation after you've played B n B. Hope the ex better for you tomorrow. Hopefully catch you next time you come to the land that time forgot!!

thats a seriously good back 9 in those conditions Matelot, the guy that we were playing with also had a good back 9 in the afternoon 38, after going oob over that wee wall to the left of the 17th green so my trusty caddy and I saw first hand how good that kind of scoring was yesterday.

Speaking of back 9's I had a rather good one at B&B today after a shocker going out. 48 out 37 back...being a more or less straight out and back course that tells me I'm comfortable in a right to left wind and really struggle to cope with left to right...most of it is probably in my head, I just can't help seeing a big dirty bend right so I try and fight it (i.e. don't fade don't fade don't fade...ok make sure you get your hand through, make sure you turn, make sure you don't cross over at the top....so too much babble going on...result...a5se...another pissy fade or even worse, a wild over correction. However when the wind comes the other way I just seem to have much more rhythm & control without having to think about it.

P.S. No captains log update today as the one known as Noshanking didn't manage to get beamed up to B&B in time. Molecular malfunction of the beam me up machine due to the presence of excess alcohol and insomnia. :-/

Captain's log stardate 10/10/2011 1918. Think my flux capacitor must be completely screwed. Landed back in Nam on empty. Had every intention of having few quiet bevvies in bar last night with the one they call JAS in preparation for B & B , but the lure of dusky, husky maidens and Tamla Motown music was too much to resist. Didn't hit sack until way,way too late and then woke to room resembling something from the opening scene in 'Apocalypse Now' with glasses, beer cans, half empty Jack Daniels bottle in room as well as dusky husky maiden from previous night snoring sonorously on my less than adequate single bed Lordy lordy I love Cornwall, even though I have left the best part of my liver down there

That sometimes happens to me in right to left wind as I tend to draw my driver down to about the 6 iron. I am able to hold off the 7 iron upwards though in those conditions to be able to get a pretty straight ball flight . Hope you enjoyed your weekend down. I played with another lad from up country and he's now planning on coming down for a " links tour" early next season. Told him a good week that I would plan on seeing as now know Cornwall well after living here for last 20 years would consist of the following tracks, St Enodoc,Newquay ,Trevose, Perranporth, West Cornwall and Mullion. Love playing all those courses with some toughies like Trevose and some like Mullion just being incredibly scenic

As D4S says on another thread......

'as for NoShanking, well if there is likely to be a woman anywhere within 5 miles of the course then he'll turn up too'

Sounds like it was a cracking few days NST.......time to recuperate and refill the batteries. I mean all that raking you had to do.

matelot golfer wrote:That sometimes happens to me in right to left wind as I tend to draw my driver down to about the 6 iron. I am able to hold off the 7 iron upwards though in those conditions to be able to get a pretty straight ball flight . Hope you enjoyed your weekend down. I played with another lad from up country and he's now planning on coming down for a " links tour" early next season. Told him a good week that I would plan on seeing as now know Cornwall well after living here for last 20 years would consist of the following tracks, St Enodoc,Newquay ,Trevose, Perranporth, West Cornwall and Mullion. Love playing all those courses with some toughies like Trevose and some like Mullion just being incredibly scenic

Get in my son!!

4.19 am!

Who's been a naughty boy!

Doon the Water wrote:4.19 am!

Who's been a naughty boy!

Doon

sorry to disappoint but I'm 'over the pond' on holiday just now so 5 hour time difference

Alas, apart from the demon drink I have no confessions to make. Just like the golf...I didn't play well (until I was half way home)

By the way Doon....re the earlier comment about David getting a hole in 1 at B&B... Was it not the 16th (about 330 yds, 350 something from the back tees)?

I played the 9 hole Channel course at Burnham & Berrow on Saturday. My god I've never played in wind that strong!!

Took an 8 on the par 4 first having hit the first drive miles off somewhere onto the main course (possibly even into Weston Super Mare) and then took four more to reach the green in the wind with the second ball.

You know it's going to be fun after an opener like that.....

MPB

The Channel course is very much under the radar, it really has some very good holes on it. First time I played BnB we played the big course in the morning then the wee course twice in the afternoon.

D4S
It's a really nice course. And £20 to play it is a real steal.

I've never played seaside golf before and the wind was a real shock to me. I managed 5 pars but a few of the not pars were disasters!
I like to play it on a more manageable day but I'm not sure if they exist!!

Jas
I was not sure of the hole hence ?
I don't know how he could make the carry and hold the green.
Similar type of hole on Duddingston where I saw Harry Bannerman go for the green. He got stuck on the slope and then played one of the greatest chip shots seen by mankind