It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

First topic message reminder :

A booze-pilfering drunken feral pig has caused chaos by running amok at an Australian campsite and starting a fight with a cow.

The belligerent porker went on a drunken bender after stealing and drinking three six-packs of beer that had been left out by campers at the DeGrey River campsite in Port Hedland, Australia.

In the predictable series of events that followed the animal went on to ransack rubbish bin bags to find some late-night snacks before starting a fight with an innocent eyewitness cow.

Following the boarish rampage the pig decided to swim out into the middle of a river before collapsing drunk under a tree and falling asleep.

One camper named Merida recounted the tale to the ABC network: "It was in the middle of the night and it was these people camping opposite us and they heard this crunching of the can and they got their torch out and shone it on the pig and there he was scrunching away at their cans."

"Then he went and raided their rubbish that they had sort of covered over with a bin as well.

"And then there was some other people camped right on the river and they saw him running around their vehicle being chased by a cow.

"It was going around and around and then it went into the river and swam across to the middle of the river.

"The people that were camped on the river went across and crept up on it and it was hiding and sleeping under a big log right on the edge of the water."

"It was sort of coming from there for a couple of days but we didn't see it this morning or last night."

rick_dagless wrote:Alas no supes, it was sliced pork.

How is life in The North treating you?

With some TCP and Rabies inoculations I suspect.

Has Tina been about lately or has he finally been beaten to death with an iron?

Fup off Shah!

Work is far too busy Rick but end is in sight as I finish up for Christmas on Tuesday and client has finally accepted that a ball-achingly complicated contract won't be done by year end.

What's everyone's plans for Christmas?

ShahenshahG wrote:Has Tina been about lately or has he finally been beaten to death with an iron?

It really is strange that both he and Duty have been posted missing for almost the exact same length of time.

I feel your pain mate, year end sucks balls...

Christmas with the in laws this year, Ace...

Yeah it is strange that supes... I have not seen Tino for ages Shah

ShahenshahG wrote:

Galted wrote:Good afternoon, Jeff. The site of your badge fills me with a great joy.  Too bad Tino's clearly dead as we could have annoyed him with talk of how sh*t/brilliant Villa are.

C*nt

Nothing wrong there, the site of his badge is 606v2 and it does fill me with a great joy. In fact, bloody well f*ck you, Shah.

superflyweight wrote:

ShahenshahG wrote:Has Tina been about lately or has he finally been beaten to death with an iron?

It really is strange that both he and Duty have been posted missing for almost the exact same length of time.  

I did suspect his frequent references to Galted in affectionate terms hinted at some deep homosexual feelings in an ''only gay in the village'' kind of way especially since according to all accounts Galted has a face only his mother (or a Russian spy who has teabagged all the red army and it's grizzly bears) could love.

ShahenshahG wrote:

superflyweight wrote:

ShahenshahG wrote:Has Tina been about lately or has he finally been beaten to death with an iron?

It really is strange that both he and Duty have been posted missing for almost the exact same length of time.  

I did suspect his frequent references to Galted in affectionate terms hinted at some deep homosexual feelings in an ''only gay in the village'' kind of way especially since according to all accounts Galted has a face only his mother (or a Russian spy who has teabagged all the red army and it's grizzly bears) could love.

Poetry.

I've noticed, Shah, that you don't have a badge. Any reason for this?

Someone whose name I forget deleted it in a fit of pique. He doesnt have the thick skin required to survive in the CC.

Secretfly is like a combination of LRR, emancipator and Davidemoore but with any traces of intellect, humour or personality removed. Being irritating round these parts isn't easy, standing out for such a quality in the Off Topic section is quite the achievement.

Tattie Scones RRN wrote:

ShahenshahG wrote:

superflyweight wrote:

ShahenshahG wrote:Has Tina been about lately or has he finally been beaten to death with an iron?

It really is strange that both he and Duty have been posted missing for almost the exact same length of time.  

I did suspect his frequent references to Galted in affectionate terms hinted at some deep homosexual feelings in an ''only gay in the village'' kind of way especially since according to all accounts Galted has a face only his mother (or a Russian spy who has teabagged all the red army and it's grizzly bears) could love.

Poetry.

I've noticed, Shah, that you don't have a badge. Any reason for this?

Terrorists don't wear uniform.

Rowley wrote:Secretfly is like a combination of LRR, emancipator and Davidemoore but with any traces of intellect, humour or personality removed. Being irritating round these parts isn't easy, standing out for such a quality in the Off Topic section is quite the achievement.

I was thinking very similar JR... Though looks like onetwo is going for the crown back...

Morning notches, what's occurring?

seanmichaels wrote:

Tattie Scones RRN wrote:

ShahenshahG wrote:

superflyweight wrote:

ShahenshahG wrote:Has Tina been about lately or has he finally been beaten to death with an iron?

It really is strange that both he and Duty have been posted missing for almost the exact same length of time.  

I did suspect his frequent references to Galted in affectionate terms hinted at some deep homosexual feelings in an ''only gay in the village'' kind of way especially since according to all accounts Galted has a face only his mother (or a Russian spy who has teabagged all the red army and it's grizzly bears) could love.

Poetry.

I've noticed, Shah, that you don't have a badge. Any reason for this?

Terrorists don't wear uniform.

Because they don't want you to find them attractive you trumpet.

Trumpet? Lol

Morning S's

Morning.

Windows got his Xmas quiz up and running yet?

Maybe sean, judging by the amount of time he has been preparing it, it should be a good one.

rick_dagless wrote:

Rowley wrote:Secretfly is like a combination of LRR, emancipator and Davidemoore but with any traces of intellect, humour or personality removed. Being irritating round these parts isn't easy, standing out for such a quality in the Off Topic section is quite the achievement.

I was thinking very similar JR...  Though looks like onetwo is going for the crown back...

Morning notches, what's occurring?

Morning Rick, dead as a doornail so far. Just catching up with the doom and gloom. How is one and all

Not bad cheers, finally done the vast majority of my Christmas shopping, and looks like the manflu is going.

get today out of the way and it is plain sailing, maybe the CC will pick up for the festive period also.

Morning gentlemen.

Secretfly is funnier than Alan Carr though.....

... and J*ck Whiteh*ll, S*e P*rkins and R*ssell H*ward.

Do you like it when Jack Whitehall gets his dad on his show?

Comédie originale.

My top 5 comedians are (current):

1. Kevin Bridges
2. Sean Lock
3. Frankie Boyle
4. Peter Kay
5. Tim Vine

I want someone to batter Michael McIntyre to death with his own fringe.

I don't watch it. I find it impossible to watch anything with him on, even 8 out of 10 cats does countdown. He is a c*nt of the most unwatchable order.

Peter Kay? That's a depressing inclusion.

Lunch - Office fuddle 10/10

I'm only 21 posts off being in the all-time top 100 posters.

With pointless posts like this

I will be there in no time,

no time at all.

What's with the like/dislike feature?

And why can't I like my own post?

Or dislike? That last one was sh*t.

This one's ok though, I'd like it if I could.

How do you stop a dog humping your leg? Pick it up and suck.it off.

Sean lock, 2010, work conference. Went down like a really bad fart in a lift.

seanmichaels wrote:How do you stop a dog humping your leg? Pick it up and suck.it off.

Sean lock, 2010, work conference. Went down like a really bad fart in a lift.

Work conferences are a meeting ground for humourless c*nts.

Gutentag Notches. Happy Friday

Morning Captain Pinkballs. How are they hanging?

Long time no see. In fact; never saw. But it's still good to see you anyway.

Sad about Jules' feline getting run over.
I wonder how his daughter's date went with that weird cat-hating fellow?

Check out that phucking palindrome.... all 4s and 6s. You beauty!

Morning Shah and LD.

That is a magnificent post, LD, even without the palindrome.

So magnificent, in fact, that I bloody well went and liked it.

Galted wrote:So magnificent, in fact, that I bloody well went and liked it.

I've just been on a Like spree... back to the previous thread even.

The Like Count:

You - 27
Shah - 27
Ricko - 27
Michaels -21
Fly - 21
Tatties - 15

I'm trying to be more egalitarian. If Tattties had posted more back in September he'd be up there too.

Will do a run on Tina once my cramp has subsided.

TLD! Good to se you back dear boy, belter of a palindrome...

Galts, always a pleasure, will be happy to support your run to poster glory.

Morning notches.

Good morning. Work Christmas do tonight. Still undecided between driving and coming home early like a miserable pr1ck or getting a lift and getting absolutely hammered and making a fool of myself. It's a free bar so I might take the latter option and abuse their good nature by drinking single malt all night.

Gutentag TLD, you watching brexit shenanigans with barely concealed amusement? How have you been? How goes the pool and the sexual deviant immigrant?

Woooo, Full house. Gutentag Jumbo Jeff, Reprehensible Rick, Gangrene Galted and Tenacious TLD

Morning Jeffers/Shah, both well?

Jeff get wasted!

Shaping up to be a good day

ShahenshahG wrote:Gutentag TLD, you watching brexit shenanigans with barely concealed amusement? How have you been? How goes the pool and the sexual deviant immigrant?

Yes to all - my fine smiling & copulating marine iguana friend. Speechless but half expected it all. We're in for some fun times, aren't we?

Pool full. Pebbles and turf before Christmas. Some painting as well.

SDI given the shaft (figuratively not literally) She was a difficult piece of work. A poor communicator too. I can't stand poor communicators. They come across as arrogant to me... or like they are hiding things... which I think she was.
She gave me no end of misery towards the end. I was mad with boredom.
She was like a supermodel run over by 30 Ukrainian tractors driven by drunken peasants. About as sexual as a 3 million year old mollusc fossil encased in amber in the bedroom. Hopeless in the laundry too... but great with the linen and fine embroidery obviously.

Otherwise all is great in this big (now wet) land.

All good Randy Rick, Its beginning to feel a lot like christmaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaas. There was a christmas do last night and it's likely someone is getting sacked today because she got P*SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSED out of her head in a first class hotel in front of her manager and really made a big f*cking scene.

The Loaded Dog wrote:

ShahenshahG wrote:Gutentag TLD, you watching brexit shenanigans with barely concealed amusement? How have you been? How goes the pool and the sexual deviant immigrant?

Yes to all - my fine smiling & copulating marine iguana friend. Speechless but half expected it all. We're in for some fun times, aren't we?

Pool full. Pebbles and turf before Christmas. Some painting as well.

SDI given the shaft (figuratively not literally) She was a difficult piece of work. A poor communicator too. I can't stand poor communicators. They come across as arrogant to me... or like they are hiding things... which I think she was.
She gave me no end of misery towards the end. I was mad with boredom.
She was like a supermodel run over by 30 Ukrainian tractors driven by drunken peasants. About as sexual as a 3 million year old mollusc fossil encased in amber in the bedroom. Hopeless in the laundry too... but great with the linen and fine embroidery obviously.

Otherwise all is great in this big (now wet) land.

Excellent. Lets find you a black south African tribal bird that you can trade for two cows. Dynamite in the sack and without the seth afrecen acksent. What more could a man want?

Sounds like you made the right choice TLD...

Haha, Shah, there is always one, what occurred?

The Loaded Dog wrote:

Galted wrote:So magnificent, in fact, that I bloody well went and liked it.

I've just been on a Like spree... back to the previous thread even.

The Like Count:

You - 27
Shah - 27
Ricko - 27
Michaels -21
Fly - 21
Tatties - 15

I'm trying to be more egalitarian. If Tattties had posted more back in September he'd be up there too.

Will do a run on Tina once my cramp has subsided.

Thanks very much you c*nt.