The Culture Cup Round x - Adam is a naughty naughty boy

by **Union Cane** Tue 14 Jul 2015, 3:14 pm

First topic message reminder :

Sonia is looking trim again, might be worth another crack?

by **Union Cane** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 2:40 pm

MaryLeBon Cricket Club

by **seanmichaels** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 2:42 pm

very good.

by Mind the windows Tino. Fri 17 Jul 2015, 2:45 pm

Lords Cricket Club?

by Mind the windows Tino. Fri 17 Jul 2015, 2:45 pm

C*ckwombles.

by **seanmichaels** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 2:50 pm

People

Spoiler:

by **superflyweight** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 2:53 pm

Glen McGrath

by **Union Cane** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 2:58 pm

Sports People

Spoiler:

by **superflyweight** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 2:59 pm

Geoffrey Boycott

by **Union Cane** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 3:01 pm

Marylebone Cricket Club?

by **superflyweight** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 3:02 pm

Lords Cricket Club?

by **Union Cane** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 3:02 pm

superflyweight wrote:Lords Cricket Club?

by **Union Cane** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 3:15 pm

Affurs

Spoiler:

by **JuliusHMarx** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 3:19 pm

Greek Bail-Out

by **superflyweight** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 3:20 pm

Sean at School Bail Out?

by **Union Cane** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 3:35 pm

Places

Spoiler:

by **JuliusHMarx** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 3:36 pm

Filler Delph Ear

by **superflyweight** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 3:37 pm

Philadelphia - home of Lords Cricket Club

by **Union Cane** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 3:40 pm

Showbiz

Spoiler:

by **seanmichaels** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 3:56 pm

Mike Clubfinger?

by **Union Cane** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 3:57 pm

Er, no.

by **JuliusHMarx** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 5:27 pm

Mike Cull Parkinson(s)

by **Union Cane** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 5:28 pm

BOOOOM!!!

There it is.

Good weekend all.

by **Galted** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 9:10 pm

seanmichaels wrote:Did some volunteering for spazzas yesterday. Bird from the office wore tight leggings and vest. Saw the outline of her minge. Lovely stuff.

Morning.

Saw a downie with a dog on a leash outside Waitrose today. Got to thinking that it might be a good idea to give each of the dogs who fail the guide dog test a downie to help ease their depression and give them a little bit of responsibility. Could also help the downie to avoid being picked on if it's a rough-looking dog.

by **JuliusHMarx** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 9:44 pm

You mean people like Robert Downie Jr?

by **Galted** Fri 17 Jul 2015, 11:05 pm

Yes. And Downie Dyer.

by **ShahenshahG** Sat 18 Jul 2015, 5:54 pm

Galtova had a year long headache galted?

by **Galted** Sat 18 Jul 2015, 6:04 pm

She's a heavy sleeper so headaches don't affect me, shah.

by **ShahenshahG** Sat 18 Jul 2015, 6:35 pm

Galted wrote:She's a heavy sleeper so headaches don't affect me, shah.

Clever man. As long as her hymen is intact you can keep it going.

by **Galted** Sat 18 Jul 2015, 8:04 pm

Or clingfilm and chewing gum.

by **ShahenshahG** Sat 18 Jul 2015, 11:18 pm

by **Galted** Sun 19 Jul 2015, 10:19 pm

I've been waiting outside your front gate since yesterday morning, Julius, are you going to let me in or not? I'm the one wearing a pointy party hat.

The cat and I made you a Happy Birthday Julius banner.

by **ShahenshahG** Mon 20 Jul 2015, 6:27 am

Fist bitches

How the devil are we riffering Rickotash?

Good Weekend?

by **rIck_dAgless** Mon 20 Jul 2015, 6:43 am

Morning Shah me old china plate...

You been gorging post ramadan?

Good weekend, been on a stag do, feeling knackered now however.

Yours?

by **ShahenshahG** Mon 20 Jul 2015, 7:31 am

Didnt gorge actually, tried alot of old school dishes that took a while to cook but were worth the effort. Focus on healthy food, grilled tandoori roast, rice that left me feeling quite weak. So topped it up with some junk food. pretty funny weekend all round after my northern family came down for a visit. These guys were the first lot to come over here so integrated instead of forming ghettos - so northern as Rowley's wig. The parents were a batty old pair half deaf and dumb as mules with the husband shouting EH?! every time the doorbell rang. His wife had us searching all over luton - about 6 of us driving off in different directions trying to find her the Mail on Sunday at 7pm. About half an hour later we managed to find one in the supermarket and she spent an hour oohing and ahhing over the stupid thing and making scandalised faces until she'd read it inside out twice. Once she put it down her son shouted at her in a series of really funny exchanges that had me crying with laughter.

Ma??

No response

MAAA?

No response

MAAAA? DON YOU RAISE YOUR VOICE T'ME YOU JOOMPED UP LITTLE B*STARD, I AIN DEAF (tries to surreptitiously adjust her hearing aid)

I called you bou 10 time Ma

WELL WHY DIDN'T YA SPEAK UP THEN, YOU KNOW MY HEARING'S GOING

CHRIST, MA

CHRIST HE SAYS, WHAT ARE YOU A FOOKIN WHITE BOY NOW?! ANSWERING BACK TO YOUR MA, SAYING CHRIST, AND LOOK AT YOUR FOOKIN HAIR, WHY DONT YOU JUST PUT ON PINK KAACHE (briefs/trunks/shorts) AND START SINGING ABOUT GAY PRIDE LIKE A FOOKIN GANDU

*Takes deep breath and kneads fist into his temple to calm down then moves closer to her* I'm really sorry Ma, I thought you'd left ya aid off

She sits in a sulky silence for a bit then: WHAT DID YA WANT THEN?

Ma, Why do you read t'mail, its full o rarecyst stoof

I ONLY READ IT FOR T'MEDICAL NEWS

*2 minutes Complete silence except for the sound of me biting into my hand to stop myself from laughing*

*Doorbell rings*

EH?? STOP RAISING YA VOICE TO YA MAA

by **rIck_dAgless** Mon 20 Jul 2015, 7:40 am

Ha, sounds like christmas round some of my family's houses, great to watch as a (almost) neutral, but horrendous when in the middle of it Smile

by **ShahenshahG** Mon 20 Jul 2015, 7:59 am

You need to invite me over for Christmas then haven't laughed so hard in years

by **rIck_dAgless** Mon 20 Jul 2015, 8:07 am

You would be more than welcome to come round with your godless ways Shah, also see family do's, weddings, and the obligatory 70th at a working men's club, and your comedy card could be filled out for the year mate...

by **seanmichaels** Mon 20 Jul 2015, 8:34 am

Morning

by **JuliusHMarx** Mon 20 Jul 2015, 8:40 am

Galted wrote:I've been waiting outside your front gate since yesterday morning, Julius, are you going to let me in or not? I'm the one wearing a pointy party hat.

The cat and I made you a Happy Birthday Julius banner.

Sorry Galted, one of the staff reported that Ray Mears was trying to crash my party, so naturally I gave orders not to let him in.

by **rIck_dAgless** Mon 20 Jul 2015, 8:45 am

Morning sean/Jules

by **seanmichaels** Mon 20 Jul 2015, 10:13 am

Fecking hell. Trying to find a place at the moment. Rental prices are outrageous! Need to fork out best part of £1.5k including deposit. I could buy a caravan for that money.

by **rIck_dAgless** Mon 20 Jul 2015, 10:24 am

southern prices mate, I rent out a flat up here for half that

by **JuliusHMarx** Mon 20 Jul 2015, 10:32 am

Buy a caravan.

by **seanmichaels** Mon 20 Jul 2015, 10:37 am

I would technically be a gippo then.

There are places for rent from Monday to Friday. Cheaper but I would need to get lucky every Friday and Saturday night.

by **JuliusHMarx** Mon 20 Jul 2015, 10:44 am

Not a problem for a man of your huge sexual prowess.

by **ShahenshahG** Mon 20 Jul 2015, 10:52 am

JuliusHMarx wrote:Not a problem for a man of your huge sexual prowess.

He has a problem of biblical proportions then

by **Pal Joey** Mon 20 Jul 2015, 10:54 am

seanmichaels wrote:I would technically be a gippo then.

There are places for rent from Monday to Friday. Cheaper but I would need to get lucky every Friday and Saturday night.

Are you OK, mate? What's happened? You haven't been chucked out by the missus have you? If so... I'm so sorry to hear.

If not... then the caravan option sounds interesting.
Or maybe come back to Oz. As they say here: If you are going to rough it out... no better place. You can live like a King in some places - if you blur your vision a little, wear ear muffs and avoid conversations with the locals.

by **ShahenshahG** Mon 20 Jul 2015, 11:03 am

The Loaded Dog wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:I would technically be a gippo then.

There are places for rent from Monday to Friday. Cheaper but I would need to get lucky every Friday and Saturday night.

Are you OK, mate? What's happened? You haven't been chucked out by the missus have you? If so... I'm so sorry to hear.

If not... then the caravan option sounds interesting.
Or maybe come back to Oz. As they say here: If you are going to rough it out... no better place. You can live like a King in some places - if you blur your vision a little, wear ear muffs and avoid conversations with the locals.

You might think you're helping but you're really not.

What happens in boarding school stays in boarding school.

by **ShahenshahG** Mon 20 Jul 2015, 11:05 am

And sean look for a flat share near an airport. Youd get a room for about 300 or 400 quid a month. Plus you might get lucky and they'll either be gays or women both of whom are notorious for their cleanliness

by **ShahenshahG** Mon 20 Jul 2015, 11:06 am

*Because they'll be rented out by flight crew

by Sponsored content