The Culture Cup Round x - Adam is a naughty naughty boy

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue Mar 08, 2016 11:59 am

First topic message reminder :

rick_dagless wrote:
The Loaded Dog wrote:
rick_dagless wrote:
Tino wrote:Why would they advise not to kill them? Not that anyone listens I guess but why would they advise that?

They keep the mosquito, cockroach, silverfish, etc... numbers in check. They are always open for spider donations from the general public for venom milking purposes.

Good answer. Very well said.

Cheers TLD, I learnt from the best...

I know that, but I just find it odd that there is actually specific advice on the subject.

It must be fact you actually have an arthropod world worth talking about.

by **ShahenshahG** Fri Mar 18, 2016 6:39 pm

DAVE667 wrote:
ShahenshahG wrote:
DAVE667 wrote:
ShahenshahG wrote:Pendleton has come 5th in the race. Well bloody done.
She had a horse, I was on foot...mine was more impressive, she's basically riding a bike with legs and she has medals for riding bikes. I can barely get out of bed in a morning

Did you finish in the top 5?
Did she finish in the top 20%?

Yes - the bottom 80% was the horse

by Guest Fri Mar 18, 2016 7:13 pm

ShahenshahG wrote:
DAVE667 wrote:
ShahenshahG wrote:
DAVE667 wrote:
ShahenshahG wrote:Pendleton has come 5th in the race. Well bloody done.
She had a horse, I was on foot...mine was more impressive, she's basically riding a bike with legs and she has medals for riding bikes. I can barely get out of bed in a morning

Did you finish in the top 5?
Did she finish in the top 20%?

Yes - the bottom 80% was the horse

...but 40% of it was ar$e...and the same for the horse!

by **Galted** Fri Mar 18, 2016 7:43 pm

I'd do her if she was lucky.

Armitstead as well.

They could both sit on my hampton and pedal like they were on a tandem going up Ventoux.

by Guest Fri Mar 18, 2016 8:14 pm

Glad you're here to add a much needed touch of class to the proceedings, Galted. What chance of c*nting Chloe Madeley along with Hugh Jackman?

by **Galted** Fri Mar 18, 2016 8:47 pm

I shall certainly give it a whirl, SerialDAVE. First I'll have to find out who she is so that I can compile a list of reasons why she's a c*nt, then I shall post. There seems to be quite a delay between nominations and the actual c*nting though unless it's someone very topical. I'm expecting to see Tilda Swinton exposed soon for the c*nt she is.
If you want to nominate someone you just add it into the comments section, you don't have to register or anything, just make up a name. If you want to avoid libel make up something outrageous like Mind The Windows Tino or Adam D.

by Rowley Fri Mar 18, 2016 10:59 pm

Galted I will pm you shortly with why Brian May should be c*nted. He deserves it.

by **Galted** Sat Mar 19, 2016 12:01 am

Very good, Jeff. It will be my intention that site users accept the reason for someone to be c*nted is because Jeff wishes it so.

by **JuliusHMarx** Sat Mar 19, 2016 9:39 pm

Hugh Jackman on Ant & Dec. Top bloke. Top, top bloke.

by **Galted** Sat Mar 19, 2016 10:53 pm

Sounds like a Stephen Fry fantasy.

by **ShahenshahG** Sat Mar 19, 2016 11:01 pm

JuliusHMarx wrote:Hugh Jackman on Ant & Dec. Top bloke. Top, top bloke.

In tinos now southern mind the latter two names switch places and he reads it as Hugh Jackman Dec ant.

by **Pal Joey** Sun Mar 20, 2016 11:09 am

de Kock on fire. He's just Hugh Jackmaned a few to the boundary... right up the V.

by **Dolphin Ziggler** Sun Mar 20, 2016 11:19 am

I like Hugh Jackman
$The Culture Cup Round x - Adam is a naughty naughty boy - Page 8 Hugh-jackman-fractures-wwe-wrestler-s-jaw-with-punch$

by **Galted** Sun Mar 20, 2016 11:22 am

The Afghans would love to see the end of de Kock.

by **ShahenshahG** Sun Mar 20, 2016 11:31 am

Galted wrote:The Afghans would love to see the end of de Kock.

kingraf wrote:Preach brother Preach.
YeAh BaBeS:

by Rowley Sun Mar 20, 2016 12:16 pm

The CC on a Sunday, is nothing sacred anymore?

by **ShahenshahG** Sun Mar 20, 2016 12:31 pm

Shahzad is going feckin nuts

by **ShahenshahG** Mon Mar 21, 2016 7:31 am

FIST Notches. Day 1 of gym is a no go as my shoulder is still injured. Mildly cloudy but looks like it'll clear up later. Feeling tired though and copious energy drinks are the order of the day.

Hullo Rollicking Rick and Tolerated TLD, How went T'weekend?

by **ShahenshahG** Mon Mar 21, 2016 8:26 am

Now that she's back in the atmosphere
With drops of Jupiter in her hair, hey, hey, hey
She acts like summer and walks like rain
Reminds me that there's a time to change, hey, hey, hey
Since the return from her stay on the moon
She listens like spring and she talks like June, hey, hey, hey
Hey, hey, hey

But tell me, did you sail across the sun?
Did you make it to the Milky Way to see the lights all faded
And that heaven is overrated?

Tell me, did you fall for a shooting star–
One without a permanent scar?
And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there?

Now that she's back from that soul vacation
Tracing her way through the constellation, hey, hey, hey (mmm)
She checks out Mozart while she does tae-bo
Reminds me that there's room to grow, hey, hey, hey (yeah)

Now that she's back in the atmosphere
I'm afraid that she might think of me as plain ol' Jane
Told a story about a man who was too afraid to fly so he never did land

But tell me, did the wind sweep you off your feet?
Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day
And head back to the Milky Way?
And tell me, did Venus blow your mind?
Was it everything you wanted to find?
And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there?

Can you imagine no love, pride, deep-fried chicken?
Your best friend always sticking up for you even when I know you're wrong
Can you imagine no first dance, freeze dried romance, five-hour phone conversation?
The best soy latte that you ever had and me

But tell me, did the wind sweep you off your feet?
Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day
And head back toward the Milky Way?

And tell me, did you sail across the sun?
Did you make it to the Milky Way to see the lights all faded
And that heaven is overrated?

And tell me, did you fall for a shooting star,
One without a permanent scar?
And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself?

Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na

And did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day?
Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na
And did you fall for a shooting star, fall for a shooting star?
Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na
And now you're lonely looking for yourself out there.

by **ShahenshahG** Mon Mar 21, 2016 8:45 am

by **ShahenshahG** Mon Mar 21, 2016 8:45 am

ECHOO

by **ShahenshahG** Mon Mar 21, 2016 8:45 am

ECHOOOOOOO

by **ShahenshahG** Mon Mar 21, 2016 8:51 am

She’s long she’s tall, she six feet from the ground
She’s long she’s tall, she six feet from the ground
She tailor made, lord she ain’t no hand me down
Oh-di-lay-ee-ay, di-lay-dee-oh, de-lay-ee
She got eyes like diamonds, lord her teeth shine just the same
She got eyes like diamonds and her teeth shine just the same
She got sweet ruby lips, and a hair like a horse’s mane
Oh-di-lay-ee-ay, di-lay-dee-oh, de-lay-ee
Every time I see you mama, you’re always on the street
Every time I see you mama, you’re always on the street
You hang out on the corner, like a police on his beat
Oh-di-lay-ee-ay, di-lay-dee-oh, de-lay-ee
Every time I need you mama, lord I always find you’re gone
Every time I need you mama, lord I always find you’re gone
Listen here sweet mama, I’m gonna put your air brakes on
Oh-di-lay-ee-ay, di-lay-dee-oh, de-lay-ee

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZlXeKNNL6BE

by Rowley Mon Mar 21, 2016 8:52 am

Morning Shah.

by **ShahenshahG** Mon Mar 21, 2016 8:55 am

Yodel Lay Hee Hoo - Morning Renegade Rowley, Art thou well? How was Thy Weekend?

by Rowley Mon Mar 21, 2016 9:02 am

I'm well mate, quiet weekend. How was yours?

by Mind the windows Tino. Mon Mar 21, 2016 9:14 am

Morning all.

by **JuliusHMarx** Mon Mar 21, 2016 9:17 am

ShahenshahG wrote:FIST Notches. Day 1 of gym is a no go as my shoulder is still injured. Mildly cloudy but looks like it'll clear up later.

Morning Shah, sorry to hear about your shoulder injury, but glad that it will clear up soon. How did it get mildly cloudy to begin with?

by **ShahenshahG** Mon Mar 21, 2016 9:22 am

Passable - nothing of real interest to report except that I can now play this after a day on the piano,

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d4ajWY064mg

So bring some bovril and let me play the music while we relive your youth that never was.

Morning Tino, How was T'rugger and any incidence of violence to report?

by **ShahenshahG** Mon Mar 21, 2016 9:27 am

JuliusHMarx wrote:
ShahenshahG wrote:FIST Notches. Day 1 of gym is a no go as my shoulder is still injured. Mildly cloudy but looks like it'll clear up later.

Morning Shah, sorry to hear about your shoulder injury, but glad that it will clear up soon. How did it get mildly cloudy to begin with?

I was trying to put my wife back in the loft and she thought I was trying a new position so faked an orgasm on command

by Mind the windows Tino. Mon Mar 21, 2016 9:50 am

ShahenshahG wrote:

Morning Tino, How was T'rugger and any incidence of violence to report?

We lost but put in a very respectable performance. Our opposition were 3rd in the league and we are 3rd from bottom. I think we only lost by 5 points so a decent effort.

No violence to report, thankfully.

Are you well?

by **ShahenshahG** Mon Mar 21, 2016 9:58 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
ShahenshahG wrote:

Morning Tino, How was T'rugger and any incidence of violence to report?

We lost but put in a very respectable performance. Our opposition were 3rd in the league and we are 3rd from bottom. I think we only lost by 5 points so a decent effort.

No violence to report, thankfully.

Are you well?

You are a brit to the core

Apart from the sore shoulder, i'm pretty good.

by **JuliusHMarx** Mon Mar 21, 2016 10:17 am

ShahenshahG wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
ShahenshahG wrote:

Morning Tino, How was T'rugger and any incidence of violence to report?

We lost but put in a very respectable performance. Our opposition were 3rd in the league and we are 3rd from bottom. I think we only lost by 5 points so a decent effort.

No violence to report, thankfully.

Are you well?

You are a brit to the core

Apart from the mildly cloudy shoulder, i'm pretty good.

Fixed for you

by **ShahenshahG** Mon Mar 21, 2016 10:21 am

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=crKcREkT47I

by Mind the windows Tino. Mon Mar 21, 2016 10:59 am

ShahenshahG wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
ShahenshahG wrote:

Morning Tino, How was T'rugger and any incidence of violence to report?

We lost but put in a very respectable performance. Our opposition were 3rd in the league and we are 3rd from bottom. I think we only lost by 5 points so a decent effort.

No violence to report, thankfully.

Are you well?

You are a brit to the core

Apart from the sore shoulder, i'm pretty good.

Yeah, that is a very British attitude. LD will be furious. First is first and second is losing to him.

by **ShahenshahG** Mon Mar 21, 2016 11:09 am

Think he is a little too chilled to be furious. Mildly irritated, I suspect. God almighty, it's been hectic here and now that it's quietened down, it's dull. What a dud day.

by **Pal Joey** Mon Mar 21, 2016 11:43 am

Good morning chaps.

Yes, only mildly irritated at best. If you'd lost by 6 - now that would be a different story.

Congrats on the Grand Slam... just caught the end of it early Sunday morning here. Not an easy thing to do but they did it.

by Mind the windows Tino. Mon Mar 21, 2016 12:02 pm

The Loaded Dog wrote:Good morning chaps.

Yes, only mildly irritated at best. If you'd lost by 6 - now that would be a different story.

Congrats on the Grand Slam... just caught the end of it early Sunday morning here. Not an easy thing to do but they did it.

It could have been 6, LD. One thing I have picked up since coming out of retirement is how easy it is to lose track of the score. I'm always aware of a rough points difference but never quite sure of the exact score!

Yes, first GS since 2003. Too long for a country with our resources but the monkey is off the back now. Outside of the Italians (possibly the Irish) the rest of them absolutely hate the English so Grand Slams are difficult for us as the opposition find an extra 5%. But, as you say, they are not easy and despite it not being a vintage tournament, Jones deserves enormous credit for effectively taking Lancasters team (with a couple of tweaks) and winning the thing.

You guys will be a very different beast in the summer tour though. Pocock and Hooper will feast on the carcasses of Robshaw and Haskell at the breakdown. That is something Fast Eddie still needs to address.

by **Pal Joey** Mon Mar 21, 2016 12:18 pm

I'm sure he'll conjure up a plan to counter our style of play and try and nullify those two. It won't be easy I agree.

Watching the closing stages of the women's... Oz getting owned by NZ again. Holly Ferling should be playing. Waste of a good blonde sitting there on the bench with her fine features. Perry not too bad either... but she recently married Matt Toomua of the Brumbies. The lucky baastard.

by **ShahenshahG** Mon Mar 21, 2016 12:43 pm

The Loaded Dog wrote:I'm sure he'll conjure up a plan to counter our style of play and try and nullify those two. It won't be easy I agree.

Watching the closing stages of the women's... Oz getting owned by NZ again. Holly Ferling should be playing. Waste of a good blonde sitting there on the bench with her fine features. Perry not too bad either... but she recently married Matt Toomua of the Brumbies. The lucky baastard.

Is that a sheep based pun?

God it's feckin boiling in this office. 23 Degrees! I understood figuratively nothing of what you both said. I really should brush up on my rugby

by **Pal Joey** Mon Mar 21, 2016 12:49 pm

ShahenshahG wrote:
The Loaded Dog wrote:I'm sure he'll conjure up a plan to counter our style of play and try and nullify those two. It won't be easy I agree.

Watching the closing stages of the women's... Oz getting owned by NZ again. Holly Ferling should be playing. Waste of a good blonde sitting there on the bench with her fine features. Perry not too bad either... but she recently married Matt Toomua of the Brumbies. The lucky baastard.

Is that a sheep based pun?

God it's feckin boiling in this office. 23 Degrees! I understood figuratively nothing of what you both said. I really should brush up on my rugby

No, I didn't intend it to be one. Which bit? The fine features?
Oh, I see the "baa" bit. No that was to get around the strict spellchecking on here.

They do grow superfine wool on the sheep near there (the ACT) though. West of Canberra towards the south west plains around Gundagai.
There are signs everywhere proclaiming "the best this..." "the best that..." Those farmers are so full of themselves!

Now I've really lost you haven't I.

see if you can turn the thermostat down to 21.6.... optimum work temperature for comfort level. 22 will do though.

by **ShahenshahG** Mon Mar 21, 2016 1:51 pm

Managed to prop the door open its gone down to lovely 20.5. Beautiful. Cold Peri Peri burger on wholemeal buns. 7/10. Feckin microwave stopped it from being 10/10

by **ShahenshahG** Mon Mar 21, 2016 4:09 pm

"Excuse me, doctor - my husband was rushed in with violent spasms in his buttocks. Where is he?"

"ICU baby, shaking that ass"

Rick would love this.

by Mind the windows Tino. Mon Mar 21, 2016 5:51 pm

ShahenshahG wrote:"Excuse me, doctor - my husband was rushed in with violent spasms in his buttocks. Where is he?"

"ICU baby, shaking that ass"

Rick would love this.

Do you think riCK is dead?

by **ShahenshahG** Mon Mar 21, 2016 6:10 pm

He accepted WFH for TWO DAYS PER WEEK. You know as well as I that he has aids.

by **seanmichaels** Mon Mar 21, 2016 11:27 pm

Tank fly boss walk jam nitty gritty
You're listening to the boy from the big bad city
This is jam hot
This is jam hot

by **seanmichaels** Mon Mar 21, 2016 11:30 pm

I'm not Paul Daniels btw. Peace out CC

by **ShahenshahG** Tue Mar 22, 2016 7:45 am

Our cheeks are nice and rosy,
And comfy cozy are we,
We're snuggled up together
Like two birds of a feather would be,
Let's take that road before us,
And sing a chorus or two,
Come on, it's lovely weather
For a sleigh ride together with you.
Just hear those sleigh bells jingling,
Ring-ting-tingling too,
Come on, it's lovely weather
For a sleigh ride together with you,
Outside the snow is falling
And friends are calling, "Yoo hoo",
Come on, it's lovely weather
For a sleigh ride together with you.

FIST Notches. How the devil are ye all. Morning, repentant rick and tumbled TLD (I hope) Mrs back yet?

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue Mar 22, 2016 8:18 am

Morning Shah, how goes it dear boy?

I assume I have not missed much?

Sick

by **Pal Joey** Tue Mar 22, 2016 8:22 am

Morning Shah. How are things in Lutonia?
Yes, she got back last week... was a bit jet lagged and tumbled herself.
Good to see sean back on here albeit fleetingly.

Hiya Rick.

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue Mar 22, 2016 8:28 am

Morning TLD, how goes the good fight?

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