The Culture Cup Round 6 - new but not really improved

First topic message reminder :

superflyweight wrote:It's in Edinburgh and it's called the "Pubic Triangle".  Is about 5 minutes from my work and there's always a distressing smell of lube hanging over the area.  

That's the one, thanks super.

Is lube really a distressing smell?

I am going to try and locate TopHat on www.tomnod.com

I'm at work, sean, I'm not going to risk clicking on that.

superflyweight wrote:I'm at work, sean, I'm not going to risk clicking on that.

It is a satellite thing. They take shots of the earth and ask you to monitor loads at random to see if you can find anything. I figured it would be too hard to find the plane so will try something easier

superflyweight wrote:So it would appear that Tina was Bob Crow and Galted was Tony Benn.  

Ha-ha, so now you all admit I'm not really Ray Mears?

Well not now we wouldn't because you have made it abundantly clear you are not Benn. In fact the chances of you being Mears have just improved by one person.

Tony Benn was also a vegetarian since 1970. Should have spotted that.

Rowley wrote:Well not now we wouldn't because you have made it abundantly clear you are not Benn. In fact the chances of you being Mears have just improved by one person.

  Boo!  

Galted wrote:

superflyweight wrote:So it would appear that Tina was Bob Crow and Galted was Tony Benn.  

Ha-ha, so now you all admit I'm not really Ray Mears?

We never said you were Ray Mears, just that you looked and dressed like him.

And just like that, I was gone.

Right, it's beer o'clock for me. Good weekend all.

Guys - Just a reminder that today is steak and blowjob day so do remember to buy some sirloin and toothpaste on the way home!

Thought I might be a bit late this morning but I wasn't. That's just the sort of crazy thing that happens to me every day.

Am in that London again today. Thought I'd mention it as Jules said we should, also do not want to get accused of being whatever person may have died over the weekend. Also would not want to deprive you of your northern idiot stereotype based fun.

Rowley wrote:Am in that London again today. Thought I'd mention it as Jules said we should, also do not want to get accused of being whatever person may have died over the weekend. Also would not want to deprive you of your northern idiot stereotype based fun.

Would be a bit hypocritical of me to join in the mockery even though I probably will. Was in Brussels for the weekend and every time my really bad French wasn't understood I reverted to the holidaying idiot stereotype by panicking then repeating myself really slowly in English.

I am not dead.

Excellent news Julius, always a good start to the day news like that...

Especially with your advanced years

Is Tino still dead?

With his brood of many offspring he may think he is, but probably just sleep deprivation...

He's probably out foraging for food then, offspring are hugely demanding from what I've seen in documentaries.

I have seen that also Galted, the food regurgitation part must really give you indigestion.

I am not dead although I have felt better. Polished off a bottle of pimms yesterday and feeling the consequences and repercussions now.

There's an ad for a Russian dating service atop my screen?? Julia looks ok.....

sean wrote:There's an ad for a Russian dating service atop my screen?? Julia looks ok.....

I have an add for a Welsh Travel Lodge, looks like somewhere you would take Julia...

Galted wrote:
Would be a bit hypocritical of me to join in the mockery even though I probably will.  

I trust as a caring member of the forum you will be on the look out for a disorientated northerner.

seanmichaels wrote:

Galted wrote:
Would be a bit hypocritical of me to join in the mockery even though I probably will.  

I trust as a caring member of the forum you will  be on the look out for a disorientated northerner.

Your trust is well placed, michaels. Am I on the look-out for mugging purposes or for rescuing?

Galted wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:

Galted wrote:
Would be a bit hypocritical of me to join in the mockery even though I probably will.  

I trust as a caring member of the forum you will  be on the look out for a disorientated northerner.

Your trust is well placed, michaels.  Am I on the look-out for mugging purposes or for rescuing?

I believe there is little threat as items of value down south such as mobile phones have little value up north. I suspect those most at risk would be employees of B&Q such as Tina. A spade and pick axe not made from a tree branch and rock is worth it's weight in Gold in Rotherham.

An important point well-made, I did assume that I'd be doing the mugging but what you said is true in reverse as well - I doubt I'll have much need for groats and tinderboxes.   Instead, I shall wander the streets with a barrel of turnip broth looking to do good turns for our neighbours from another era.

Alas, 'tis true we have no use for such trinkets up here, we stare in wonderment at such life changing items, such as beats by dre headphones, Hipster foldaway bikes and banal yet surprisingly expensive coats.

Give me a stick and a hoop any day...

On the otherhand, being able to have 10 wives, 2 of which can be your sister is a bonus.

sean wrote:On the otherhand, being able to have 10 wives, 2 of which can be your sister is a bonus.

It does save the hassle sean, plus we don't have the plethora of catalogue bride options that you do down there so have to get closer to home

I might have to be in Hull on Friday and would appreciate any tips on dress and behaviour.
For example, should I wear a flat cap and drink my gravy straight from my plate or am I mixing up my counties? If I get into a tight spot, would I able to whip out a lighter and have the locals worship my mastery of fire?

All these things have to be taken into consideration, however they are experiencing a paradigm shift as they move towards being the capital of culture. So the fire thing is a no-no, but do not approach the dogs or feral children.

As for dress, don't wear one, go for trousers, it will only confuse and annoy.

The Gravy will be too thick and meaty for your southern ways so steer clear!

JuliusHMarx wrote:I might have to be in Hull on Friday and would appreciate any tips on dress and behaviour.
For example, should I wear a flat cap and drink my gravy straight from my plate or am I mixing up my counties? If I get into a tight spot, would I able to whip out a lighter and have the locals worship my mastery of fire?

If you're seriously going to Hull is there any possibilty you could take 10 bags of coal for me? I am in the process of buying 30 acres of land for redevelopment and the remaining 10 of 15 bags in total constitutes full and final settlement.

rick_dagless wrote:All these things have to be taken into consideration, however they are experiencing a paradigm shift as they move towards being the capital of culture.

I had forgotten that Hull is due to be the capital of culture. What with me being the captain of culture here, I feel confident that I will fit right in and be able to throw in some good tips to steer them on their course. They may even offer me a choice of women to persuade me to stay.

JuliusHMarx wrote:

rick_dagless wrote:All these things have to be taken into consideration, however they are experiencing a paradigm shift as they move towards being the capital of culture.

I had forgotten that Hull is due to be the capital of culture. What with me being the captain of culture here, I feel confident that I will fit right in and be able to throw in some good tips to steer them on their course. They may even offer me a choice of women to persuade me to stay.

Will take a lot of persuading given that Steve Bruce is considered the 2nd most attractive woman in Hull.

Rowley wrote:also do not want to get accused of being whatever person may have died over the weekend

Sorry, Jeff, but I suspect that you're really Clarissa Dickson Wright.

Reminds me of that old Elvis joke -
Good news for fans of Clarissa Dickson Wright - she's losing weight.

Can't be rowley as every recipe would have been a raw potato or a turnip covered in gravy

Shah wrote:Can't be rowley as every recipe would have been a raw potato or a turnip covered in gravy

As opposed to her usual fare of Panda Eyes with Grated Seal and Cous Cous

Forgettable on here today

Stop trying to stir up controversy dagless. Jeff may be in London/a dead fat lady but Julius is still around to lock any threads.

Galted wrote:Stop trying to stir up controversy dagless

They have their hands full with the boxing board, and conversations about missing aircraft and deceased left wingers, it can be like the wild west on here...

May have to misplace some punctuation "at" this rate;

Have we found out whether Tino is a deceased union leader?

rick_dagless wrote:

Galted wrote:Stop trying to stir up controversy dagless

They have their hands full with the boxing board, and conversations about missing aircraft and deceased left wingers, it can be like the wild west on here...

May have to misplace some punctuation "at" this rate;

Have we found out whether Tino is a deceased union leader?

I believe he could be responsible for the missing flight MH370

sean wrote:I believe he could be responsible for the missing flight MH370

Colluding with a Shark to feed the people on the flight to wilst masquerading as being pregnant, then heading to Europe to claim benefits, and hiding the young in Tino's ever increasing Brood?

I can't lock threads on here, I can only improve them.

Improved on here.

Galted wrote:
Improved on here.

Watched the Top Gear Burma special last night. Quite enjoyed it.

sean wrote:Watched the Top Gear Burma special last night. Quite enjoyed it.

Don't usually enjoy the specials are they tend to be a badly acted, highly scripted, egofest.

So stayed clear of this one.

rick_dagless wrote:

sean wrote:Watched the Top Gear Burma special last night. Quite enjoyed it.

Don't usually enjoy the specials are they tend to be a badly acted, highly scripted, egofest.

How does that differ from the regular ones?

Julius wrote:How does that differ from the regular ones?

The regular ones at least have sections about the actual cars, albeit interspersed with 40 mins of the above...

Same gags but they do make me laugh