The Culture Cup Round 6 - new but not really improved

First topic message reminder :

5. civic

19

7. Tale of Two Cities

6 Which Childrens Toy is an Anagram of Cannot Aim?
7 Which Charles Dickens Novel is the biggest selling single volume book of all time? (over 200 million copeis beating lord of the rings into second) - Tale of 2 cities - super
8 Which Football team are nicknamed 'The Tykes' - Barnsley - Union
9 What is the name of the dog in traditional Punch and Judy Shows?
10 If you were puting numbers on new changing room lockers to be numbered from 1 to 100, how many times would you use the number 9?

10. 20

6 Which Childrens Toy is an Anagram of Cannot Aim?
7 Which Charles Dickens Novel is the biggest selling single volume book of all time? (over 200 million copeis beating lord of the rings into second) - Tale of 2 cities - super
8 Which Football team are nicknamed 'The Tykes' - Barnsley - Union
9 What is the name of the dog in traditional Punch and Judy Shows?
10 If you were puting numbers on new changing room lockers to be numbered from 1 to 100, how many times would you use the number 9? 20(finally) -Union

20! Will need to have a think about that.

6. Action Man

6 Which Childrens Toy is an Anagram of Cannot Aim? Action Man Union
7 Which Charles Dickens Novel is the biggest selling single volume book of all time? (over 200 million copeis beating lord of the rings into second) - Tale of 2 cities - super
8 Which Football team are nicknamed 'The Tykes' - Barnsley - Union
9 What is the name of the dog in traditional Punch and Judy Shows? Toby - you all hate dogs
10 If you were puting numbers on new changing room lockers to be numbered from 1 to 100, how many times would you use the number 9? 20(finally) -Union

9. Pickles

he found the world cup

9. Rover

- Toby...

Toby is another word for Hampton in certain parts of Scotland. As in:

"not just now love, I'm scratching my toby."

One for the Jules lexicon...

Surely jules/jewels would be a better term for Hampton

A "Toby Carvery" has a much more sinister meaning in Dundee.

Everything has a more sinister meaning in Dundee...

Even the complete misnomer of the "Law Hill"

Yep - the misnomer is an attempt to deflect from the fact that it's a brutal murder hot spot.

So is everywhere else...

Not sure that Enid Blyton had a place like Dundee in mind when writing the Famous Five. Certainly don't remember George, Timmy the dog and the rest of the gang being chased home from primary school by hammer wielding nutters from the year above.

I can remeber walking along Blackness road in Dundee towards the all night bakery that (used?) resided there, and walking past about 4 girls aged between 12-14 glue sniffing from carrier bags, great days...

"Clarkies" all night bakery is still there. Lovely stuff.

Is it? Nice! Scooby Snacks post Fat Sam's/Mardi Gras... Always a pleasure

Lorraine Kelly is from Dundee. Got her autograph once (used to go to school with Dr Hilary Jones' kids).

seanmichaels wrote:Lorraine Kelly is from Dundee. Got her autograph once (used to go to school with Dr Hilary Jones' kids).

No she's not. She supports Dundee Utd but is in fact from Gorbals, Glasgow. Do a lot of Scottish towns sound like internal organs?

Cracking pair of wangers on Kelly.

Have always found Kelly strangely attractive, think it is the accent.

Rowley wrote:Have always found Kelly strangely attractive, think it is the accent.

Yeah, think I had a crush as a 13 year old.

What about the bird off of Location, Location, Location? I think she'd be good to snuggle up to if your heating was knackered. Not sure about steamy summer nights though.

Never got the whole attraction with Kirsty Allsop. Completely lost on me I am afraid. I also hate property shows, which perhaps clouds my judgement of her somewhat, whereas mindless early morning tittle tattle is something I cannot get enough of.

True story.

Was waiting for a bus near Caird Park in Dundee when I was about 14 and on the same day that Lorraine Kelly was getting married at Main Castle which was about 500 yards from the bus stop. A couple (dressed to the nines and sporting impressive home county accents) in a BMW 7 Series pulled up at the bus stop and asked me for directions to Main Castle. As I leaned into the passenger side to offer my assistance, an unholy amount of snot inexplicably dripped out of my nose and onto the jacket sleeve of the female wedding guest.

Despite that, their ingrained politeness meant that they still felt the need to thank me for the directions.

seanmichaels wrote:What about the bird off of Location, Location, Location? I think she'd be good to snuggle up to if your heating was knackered. Not sure about steamy summer nights though.

Doesn't do it for me, she is almost as broad as she is long.

Georgina Burnett, the weather presenter.

Wowzers.

Do people watch the BBC news much? If so, have you noticed the absolute rotters they send out to Syria, Afghanistan and Iraq? Orla Guerin, Lyse Doucet and that big tranny looking thing out there at the moment. Unbelievable.

Union Cane wrote:Georgina Burnett, the weather presenter.

Wowzers.

Yes baby. She can check out my low front.

seanmichaels wrote:Do people watch the BBC news much? If so, have you noticed the absolute rotters they send out to Syria, Afghanistan and Iraq? Orla Guerin, Lyse Doucet and that big tranny looking thing out there at the moment. Unbelievable.

If they sent tidy pieces then the Arabs would have them away for hostages and that, innit.

Once had three separate one night stands with a barmaid that looked like Sarah Beeny. I'm not proud of it but in my defence:

(a) I'd taken on a considerable amount of alcohol and drugs;
(b) I worked for her mum and so it felt like sticking it to the boss; and
(c) her dad was a Rangers fan so it felt like sticking it to Rangers fans everywhere.

I feel like I should join in, but laddish bawdiness is alas beyond me. Rest assured though, I am very much part of this conversation in spirit.

Union Cane wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:Do people watch the BBC news much? If so, have you noticed the absolute rotters they send out to Syria, Afghanistan and Iraq? Orla Guerin, Lyse Doucet and that big tranny looking thing out there at the moment. Unbelievable.

If they sent tidy pieces then the Arabs would have them away for hostages and that, innit.

 
I thought most Arabs were red blooded heterosexuals?

Don't act like t*ats. Comments like that make it very difficult for me to b*llock people and delete threads on the off topic section, and I dearly love doing both of those things.

Rowley wrote:Don't act like t*ats. Comments like that make it very difficult for me to b*llock people and delete threads on the off topic section, and I dearly love doing both of those things.

Calm down, that is clearly a joke (the wooftie bit not them being rotters).

seanmichaels wrote:

Rowley wrote:Don't act like t*ats. Comments like that make it very difficult for me to b*llock people and delete threads on the off topic section, and I dearly love doing both of those things.

Calm down, that is clearly a joke (the wooftie bit not them being rotters).

I am sure it is, but if I ignore it the next time I kick off on the off topic section they will use exactly the same excuse.

Apologies!

superflyweight wrote:Once had three separate one night stands with a barmaid that looked like Sarah Beeny.  I'm not proud of it but in my defence:

(a) I'd taken on a considerable amount of alcohol and drugs;
(b) I worked for her mum and so it felt like sticking it to the boss; and
(c) her dad was a Rangers fan so it felt like sticking it to Rangers fans everywhere.  

I've never delibrately treated a bird badly. Once told everyone about the barmaid at work's bedroom antics and they blurted it out in front of her every night after that. In hindsight though it was a lucky escape. Blatantly after a baby.

I didn't treat her badly, sean. She was more than happy with the arrangement.

seanmichaels wrote:

superflyweight wrote:Once had three separate one night stands with a barmaid that looked like Sarah Beeny.  I'm not proud of it but in my defence:

(a) I'd taken on a considerable amount of alcohol and drugs;
(b) I worked for her mum and so it felt like sticking it to the boss; and
(c) her dad was a Rangers fan so it felt like sticking it to Rangers fans everywhere.  

I've never delibrately treated a bird badly. Once told everyone about the barmaid at work's bedroom antics and they blurted it out in front of her every night after that. In hindsight though it was a lucky escape. Blatantly after a baby.

Mate at work once felt the need to show us a video of a barmaid that was doing the rounds in his local area. Imagine the young girl who was recently the subject of much derision for her antics in Ibiza and then imagine it was her mum's old sister. Hypnotically compelling yet utterly terrifying at the same time.

For those of you still struggling, imagine a "large lady" eagerly stuffing numerous sausage rolls into her mouth....at the same time.

Enjoy you tea, lads!

rick_dagless wrote:Cat question also left (where is Galted when you need him)

My cat's a female, she's called Ruby (also Sh1thead and Shortarse when the missus isn't about).

I'm sure the answer to the question about 9s is 19.

If anyone gets bored at work because they don't/do have access to 606v2 they might want to make comments on the Daily Mail website, especially articles about animals being hunted by other animals or humans.  The logic of the resident hysterical bunnyhuggers is comedy gold - I'd advise adopting a very heavy-handed and ignorant pro-hunting approach.  So far today I've particularly upset MikeB from Basingstoke and Raccoon Foot from Reading. Hilary from Sunderland seems up for a bit of Galted though so it's a win-win all around.

Fist.

Not a bank holiday in Scotland, so suspect I'm going to be on my own all day today guessing which of you was Richard Attenborough. Most obvious answer is Jules, but I'm leaning towards sean at the moment.

Segundo

Morning superfly. No Bank Holiday here either.

Bloody hell... the doors are locked!

Every day is a holiday in Sydney, LB.

Relieved that you're not dear old Dickie.