It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

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It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by Galted on Mon Jan 23, 2017 1:55 pm

First topic message reminder :

Have I missed it?
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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by ShahenshahG on Fri Mar 17, 2017 7:21 am

What about STD Roulette?

Gutentag the few notches available today.

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by Galted on Fri Mar 17, 2017 8:07 am

ShahenshahG wrote:What about STD Roulette?

Gutentag the few notches available today.

No thanks, I'm at work.

Gutentag to you as well though.
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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by seanmichaels on Fri Mar 17, 2017 8:08 am

Did £140 on a fruit machine a few weeks ago. Can't gamble sensibly. Facking noel edmonds

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by ShahenshahG on Fri Mar 17, 2017 8:10 am

seanmichaels wrote:Did £140 on a fruit machine a few weeks ago. Can't gamble sensibly. Facking noel edmonds

Why didn't you just visit your prefects instead?

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by ShahenshahG on Fri Mar 17, 2017 8:10 am

Morning Galted the Spalted, how goeth it all?

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by JuliusHMarx on Fri Mar 17, 2017 8:49 am

Fist

Damn

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by ShahenshahG on Fri Mar 17, 2017 9:20 am

Morning Julius the Gulyas

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by Galted on Fri Mar 17, 2017 9:24 am

ShahenshahG wrote:Morning Galted the Spalted, how goeth it all?

It goes swimmingly, and has done ever since I learned of the word 'spalted'. When I've worked it into a conversation I shall be bl"*ody f*cking h*ppy.

How are you, my intolerant friend?
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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by JuliusHMarx on Fri Mar 17, 2017 9:34 am

Some wood sculptures are spalted quite nicely.

If you go to Hungary you might see some gulyas.

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by Galted on Fri Mar 17, 2017 9:43 am

Cheers, Julius, but I've never initiated a wood sculpture conversation before.
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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by JuliusHMarx on Fri Mar 17, 2017 10:09 am

Galted wrote:Cheers, Julius, but I've never initiated a wood sculpture conversation before.

Surprising, given your knowledge and experience of all things cultural.

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by Galted on Fri Mar 17, 2017 10:19 am

Thanks for noticing that it's surprising.

As soon as I get my new Arts Pass I will find a wood sculpture exhibition so that I can say "I do not believe that I've ever borne witness to such diabolical spalting. C*nts".
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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by JuliusHMarx on Fri Mar 17, 2017 10:20 am

Galted wrote:Thanks for noticing that it's surprising.

As soon as I get my new Arts Pass I will find a wood sculpture exhibition so that I can say "I do not believe that I've ever borne witness to such diabolical spalting. C*nts".

Followed by a silent fart.

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by Galted on Fri Mar 17, 2017 10:43 am

JuliusHMarx wrote:
Galted wrote:Thanks for noticing that it's surprising.

As soon as I get my new Arts Pass I will find a wood sculpture exhibition so that I can say "I do not believe that I've ever borne witness to such diabolical spalting. C*nts".

Followed by a silent fart.

Of course, there's no point to culture without a silent fart.
My mingle, release and drift away technique is second to none.
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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by ShahenshahG on Fri Mar 17, 2017 1:51 pm


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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by JuliusHMarx on Sat Mar 18, 2017 10:15 pm

I'm not Chuck Berry.

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by Galted on Sat Mar 18, 2017 11:35 pm

Julius is dead.
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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by Galted on Sat Mar 18, 2017 11:36 pm

JuliusHMarx wrote:I'm not Chuck Berry.

Sorry, hadn't seen that when I posted.
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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by The Loaded Dog on Mon Mar 20, 2017 7:31 am

Morning clubmuckers,

I'm nearly not Michael Caine. Does he have a death wish or something?

Have a really scary spider story. Almost to embarrassing to post. So so evil... yet a touch of respect between the juicy one and me - in my slumber state. Nature at its best. Or symbiosis if you will...
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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by rick_dagless on Mon Mar 20, 2017 8:02 am

wotcha TLD, please regale us with tales of arachnids....

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by The Loaded Dog on Mon Mar 20, 2017 8:15 am

plan of spider web:

I was staying overnight at the edge of jungle... front bedroom. Feb 16? It had been a brutally hot day of about 42 degrees. Fans on constantly in between swims/showers... yet hardly any relief. Unbearable!

Finally drifted off to sleep when the temperature dropped below 30. Probably 1am. Slept quite soundly thereafter.

Had to get up early, around 6am. Just had this funny sense of a silent yet hard working presence. In the very near vicinity.

Remember the Bond movie with the gondola somewhere in the Alps? Jeff must know which one.

The first thing I saw upon awakening was this relatively good sized spider suspended a few inches from my face... slightly to my left. I didn't panic. Just let it do its thing. In a couple of seconds it was over on top of the fan (which was still blasting away off the foot of the bed)
It then abseiled over to a sideboard and I used the cup method to capture it. It turned into a beautiful gold and brown ball... almost like one of those Ferrero Rocher chocolate balls... which I think are totally overrated by the way.

Took him/her outside and it went down a gap in the corner of the front verandah.

It must have thought: great place to set up. Breeze with potential victims from window... so I'll make it parallel to that. The old dog must have struggled in this heat too so I'll let him lie. Just string my gondola from wall to fan and hopefully be ready by dawn.

I was pretty freaked out by its derring-do yet I marvelled at its brazen ingenuity.
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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by The Loaded Dog on Mon Mar 20, 2017 8:34 am

Pretty sure this is it... or a relative. Taken just now. Massive, massive web under a flood light.

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by rick_dagless on Mon Mar 20, 2017 8:44 am

I would have shat my pants TLD so fair play to you...

How is life in general dear boy? Casa del TLD all done now?

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by The Loaded Dog on Mon Mar 20, 2017 8:48 am

rick_dagless wrote:I would have shat my pants TLD so fair play to you...

How is life in general dear boy? Casa del TLD all done now?

About 96% done inside. A bit of landscaping still to do.
After that heatwave we've had heavy rain almost every day. Quite frustrating (the delays) but nearly there.

How are things with you, Ricko? All good I trust.
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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by superflyweight on Mon Mar 20, 2017 9:09 am

I too would have shat my pants and would have pissed the bed for good measure!

I almost cooked myself alive by refusing to open a window on my first night in Sydney. I'd noticed a massive tree outside the window of my room and thought there was a good chance that if I left the window open I'd wake up sharing the bed with all kinds of arachnids and insects.

It was mid-summer and I woke up the next morning with a hearty bout of dehydration sickness and spent the day throwing up any water that I tried to drink. Good times.

When I was eventually well enough to take in my surroundings, I noticed the massive fly screen across the window.


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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by rick_dagless on Mon Mar 20, 2017 9:14 am

I am pretty good TLD, just picked up keys to new digs, and the new job is going well.

Hope we are getting pictures when you are all done.

Morning supes.

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by superflyweight on Mon Mar 20, 2017 9:24 am

Morning Rickster.

One of my mates (in his late 30's) was in the union in Dundee over the weekend.

Shameful!

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by rick_dagless on Mon Mar 20, 2017 9:38 am

Blimey, I bet he felt old...

Wonder if it has changed? I can still hear the Daytona theme as I walk into the pool/arcade room now.

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by Galted on Mon Mar 20, 2017 9:45 am

I went to the Talented Art Fair in Shoreditch on Friday, Shoreditch being a hipster breeding ground.
What an absolute c*nt-fest, one beardy w*nker was wearing an orange leather jacket and purple top hat with a feather. Galtova even chose not to be offended when I said 'what a c*nt' more loudly than intended, though she did tell me to shut the f*ck up.

Luckily we had tickets to Beethoven's 9th on Saturday so my faith in humankind received a big boost.
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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by superflyweight on Mon Mar 20, 2017 10:03 am

Galted wrote:I went to the Talented Art Fair in Shoreditch on Friday, Shoreditch being a hipster breeding ground.
What an absolute c*nt-fest, one beardy w*nker was wearing an orange leather jacket and purple top hat with a feather. Galtova even chose not to be offended when I said 'what a c*nt' more loudly than intended, though she did tell me to shut the f*ck up.

Luckily we had tickets to Beethoven's 9th on Saturday so my faith in humankind received a big boost.

It always amuses me to imagine what might happen to someone dressed like that in a place like Airdrie or Coatbridge.

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by ShahenshahG on Mon Mar 20, 2017 10:28 am

superflyweight wrote:
Galted wrote:I went to the Talented Art Fair in Shoreditch on Friday, Shoreditch being a hipster breeding ground.
What an absolute c*nt-fest, one beardy w*nker was wearing an orange leather jacket and purple top hat with a feather. Galtova even chose not to be offended when I said 'what a c*nt' more loudly than intended, though she did tell me to shut the f*ck up.

Luckily we had tickets to Beethoven's 9th on Saturday so my faith in humankind received a big boost.

It always amuses me to imagine what might happen to someone dressed like that in a place like Airdrie or Coatbridge.  

Invite rick to airdrie and find out. Gutentag notches, El chauffer for the day.

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by rick_dagless on Mon Mar 20, 2017 10:54 am

I've been to Airdrie, never again.

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by ShahenshahG on Mon Mar 20, 2017 11:01 am

You had black and blue added to the purple and orange?

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by rick_dagless on Mon Mar 20, 2017 11:47 am

They are too drunk or emaciated from a poor diet to fight Shah, I just had to continually fight the urge to sign on.

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by ShahenshahG on Mon Mar 20, 2017 12:03 pm

Hahah

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by rick_dagless on Mon Mar 20, 2017 1:48 pm

Afternoon notches.

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by seanmichaels on Tue Mar 21, 2017 7:02 am

Just recovering after weekend. Found in a flower bed Saturday night / Sunday morning. Not my proudest moment

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by rick_dagless on Tue Mar 21, 2017 7:14 am

Any reason or just a big session?

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by Galted on Tue Mar 21, 2017 8:27 am

seanmichaels wrote:Just recovering after weekend. Found in a flower bed Saturday night / Sunday morning. Not my proudest moment

Reminds me of a 21st I went to back in the day. Arrived late and drunk and was keen to make an impression so imitated some loud, slurring idiot. Thought I was doing a good job and couldn't understand why no-one was laughing then discovered that the slurrer was sober but retarded.
Felt a bit bad and rescued the situation in the only way I could, making friends with him and getting him bladdered. He disappeared after a while and we spent ages searching for him, when he was found he was lying in his underpants in a flowerbed, the rest of his clothes were in a plastic bag next to him.
Buck-passing c*nts tried to blame me when it was their fault for leaving a retarded person in the care of a drunk person.
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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by JuliusHMarx on Tue Mar 21, 2017 8:35 am

I'm not Martin McGuiness.

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by rick_dagless on Tue Mar 21, 2017 10:16 am

Good to hear it Jules.

Has micheals retired to the flowerbed again?

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by ShahenshahG on Tue Mar 21, 2017 10:22 am

The natural home of the pansy.

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by JuliusHMarx on Tue Mar 21, 2017 3:15 pm

I'm not Colin Dexter.

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by rick_dagless on Tue Mar 21, 2017 3:32 pm

--. .-.. .- -.. / - --- / .... . .- .-. / - .... .- -

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by JuliusHMarx on Tue Mar 21, 2017 3:39 pm

Not sure what that says rick. Presumably it's in Inspector Morse code.

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by Galted on Tue Mar 21, 2017 4:08 pm

Very clever, reminds me of the thread in its heyday.
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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by JuliusHMarx on Tue Mar 21, 2017 4:11 pm

"Glad to hear that"

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by seanmichaels on Tue Mar 21, 2017 7:18 pm

I was working Saturday morning. Couldn't decide what to do, all friends wanted me to go down for brothers belated 40th. Eventually decided to drive down to Christchurch in work clothes on premise I could borrow some once down there. Just basically cooked myself during rugby having eaten nothing all day.funny thing was, having been helped up to the flat from flower bed, I carried on till 4am and a bird even wanted a piece of me. She was tidy as well. Saw her snatch I'm the morning

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by rick_dagless on Wed Mar 22, 2017 7:11 am

Morning notches

Fist

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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

Post by The Loaded Dog on Wed Mar 22, 2017 8:29 am

Morning Rick. Wassup? All good?

seanmichaels wrote: Saw her snatch I'm the morning

I bet you were... in her eyes. Laugh

Spent a few hours in garden beds over the years too. Most painful was my aunt's rose garden at her son's wedding in ChCh (NZ).

Then a few hours later I was rudely interrupted by my uncle whilst rollicking around with a bridesmaid in the sitting room.
He just said "oh.. excuse me (insert name)" and then quietly closed the door. I'll never forget the look of surprise/nudge-nudge-wink-wink on his face.
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Re: It's not 'Send', it's the 'Culture Cup', stupid.

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