Glasgow and Edinburgh: Ongoing Banter Thread

[George Carlin]

First topic message reminder :

A. Edinburgh
 

 
1. Pre-season
 
Fri 30 Aug 2013, 19:45
Edinburgh Rugby 15 - 5 Newcastle Falcons
 
Fri 23 Aug 2013, 19:30
Northampton Saints 24 - 6 Edinburgh Rugby
 
2. 2013/2014 Season - Played
 
Sat 7 Sep, 19:15
Munster Rugby 34 - 23 Edinburgh Rugby
 
Fri 13 Sep, 19:45
Edinburgh Rugby 16 - 13 Newport Gwent Dragons
 
Sat 21 Sep, 18:30
Ospreys 44 - 10 Edinburgh Rugby
 
Fri 27 Sep, 19:45
Edinburgh Rugby 9 - 22 Scarlets

Sun 6 Oct, 14:05
Cardiff Blues 29 - 12 Edinburgh Rugby

Fri 25 Oct, 19:45
Edinburgh Rugby 20 - 13 Benetton Treviso

Fri 1 Nov 19:45
Edinburgh Rugby 25 - 23 Zebre

Fri 22 Nov 19:05
Ulster Rugby 41 - 17 Edinburgh Rugby

Fri 29 Nov 19:45
Edinburgh Rugby 43 - 10 Connacht

3. 2013/2014 Season - Next 3 Games
 
Fri 20 Dec 19:35
Edinburgh Rugby v Leinster

Thu 26 Dec 15:05
Edinburgh Rugby v Glasgow Warriors

Wed 1 Jan 18:05
Glasgow Warriors v Edinburgh Rugby

B. Glasgow
 

 
1. Pre-season
 
Sat 31 Aug 2013, 15:00
Exeter Chiefs 26 - 29 Glasgow Warriors
 
2. 2013/2014 Season
 
Fri 6 Sep, 19:35
Glasgow Warriors 22 - 15 Cardiff Blues
 
Fri 13 Sep, 19:05
Ulster Rugby 12 - 13 Glasgow Warriors
 
Fri 20 Sep, 19:35
Glasgow Warriors 12 - 6 Leinster Rugby
 
Fri 27 Sep, 19:30
Zebre 17 - 24 Glasgow Warriors
 
Sat 5 Oct, 18:30
Scarlets 12 - 17 Glasgow Warriors

Fri 25 Oct, 19:35
Glasgow Warriors 6 - 13 Munster Rugby

Sat 2 Nov, 17:00
Connacht Rugby 12 - 19 Glasgow Warriors

Fri 22 Nov, 19:35
Glasgow Warriors 8 - 23 Newport Gwent Dragons

Fri 29 Nov, 19:05
Ospreys 16 - 28 Glasgow Warriors

3. 2013/2014 Season - Next 3 Games
 
Fri 20 Dec, 19:35
Glasgow Warriors   v   Benetton Treviso

Thu 26 Dec 15:05
Edinburgh Rugby v Glasgow Warriors

Wed 1 Jan 18:05
Glasgow Warriors v Edinburgh Rugby
 
Bearing in mind the above - what I'd like to know for each team is:
 
1. How is the season likely to go?
2. What are the teams' strengths?
3. What are the teams' weaknesses?
4. What can be done to improve matters for each team?
 
Any jingoism, sledging or graceless kicking of anyone whilst they are up or down will see posts deleted.
 
Be gracious and be constructive.

[funnyExiledScot]

The "AsLongAsBut100ofUs most over-rated player of the year"

Explain pls, tattie?

  

[jimbopip]

Why does the rain fall from up above ?
Why do fools fall in love?
Why do the MFL exfoliate?
Why does Toonie make the decisions he does? Because he's a great coach, man manager and inspired rugby guru. Or a complete headcase who makes Rab C Johnson look calm and measured in his utterances.
Consult Muppetometer to see which Toonie is in the office at the moment.

[EWT Spoons]

'The surprisingly quick for a prop award' - WP Nel
'The surprisingly slow for a back award' - Cuthbert

Included my suggested nominations as well.

'Dedication to Ruck observing’
‘ The Lee Jones award for worst 2nd Season’
‘Claire Balding lookalike award’ – Really just an award for Denton

[Guest]

Kelly Brown is a 6.

I'm just saying.

For anyone who is feeling down about Scottish rugby I just saw this. Aside from the fact that Lamont still plays for us and would still get skinned by a centre, have a look at how awful the follow up from that piece of play is. At least, at very least, we're not quite so **** anymore.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=riEWC--VIs4

[tigertattie]

The "AsLongAsBut100ofUs most over-rated player of the year"

Explain pls, tattie?

  

  good deduction Mr FES

[AsLongAsBut100ofUs]

The "AsLongAsBut100ofUs most over-rated player of the year"

Explain pls, tattie?

  

  good deduction Mr FES

Well unfortunately we may simply never know, thanks to RabC's tremenjous selections!

[tigertattie]

who ya gonna blame if Cotter doesnt pick him too?

[AsLongAsBut100ofUs]

Tattie, nice idea on the independence thread - sadly aside from yourself (Salmond comments aside - wow, you really do loathe him, what did he do to you as a wee boy?), fES and rodders, it seems to have attracted only bigoted detritus (mostly non-Scots with as far as I can tell, zero affiliation) - oh well

[AsLongAsBut100ofUs]

who ya gonna blame if Cotter doesnt pick him too?

Be patient, young laddie, his time will come

[tigertattie]

Tattie, nice idea on the independence thread - sadly aside from yourself (Salmond comments aside - wow, you really do loathe him, what did he do to you as a wee boy?), fES and rodders, it seems to have attracted only bigoted detritus (mostly non-Scots with as far as I can tell, zero affiliation) - oh well

yar, its the side of the uk I really cannot be done with! This is why many folk want out of the union, because there is a minority of tools that think they own everyone else! I just don't agree that Scotland can stand alone and it would cost too much money to "set up" an independent country. I'd have been first in line to stop Scotland joining the Union in the first place, but Scotland and the UK are too inter-twyned to tear apart now!

Anyway, RDW will be getting his big red pen out so Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Back to the rugby

Baby Bennett is still too young   

[AsLongAsBut100ofUs]

[tigertattie]

 

[21st Century Schizoid Man]

Ah yes the bigoted EDL detritus and assorted fascists. Always an interesting mix !   

[RDW]

This isn't a drill - Richie Vernon is playing at centre on Saturday!!   

http://m.scotsman.com/sport/rugby/latest/richie-vernon-hopes-switch-to-centre-pays-off-1-3231829

[Biltong]

So all you Scottish laddies how are the Saffers (Soon to be ex-Saffers) doing over there?

[RDW]

So all you Scottish laddies how are the Saffers (Soon to be ex-Saffers) doing over there?

WP Nel is a regular starter at tighthead for Edinburgh but is still a little inconsistent in the scrums. Does pretty well on the whole.

Wicuus Blaauw has generally played regularly off the bench, and has done ok. Needs to lose a bit of weight though!

Isaak van bee vesthausen (sp?) has been a regular starter in the 2nd row and is now our lineout caller. He's generally been good, but I've been expecting a bit more from him.

Du preez has been outstanding - our best signing for a number if years. Scored a try 4 games in a row and adds real physicality despite being relatively small in modern back row terms. Very promising player.

[Tramptastic]

This isn't a drill - Richie Vernon is playing at centre on Saturday!!   

http://m.scotsman.com/sport/rugby/latest/richie-vernon-hopes-switch-to-centre-pays-off-1-3231829

Oh Curse my slow walk to work, was just about to post this but you beat me to it!

I sat down at my desk, looked up the news and burst out laughing, this is so ridiculous that a 606v2 suggestion has actually been put forward by professional coaches! Hats off to the first 606er to suggest it!

[21st Century Schizoid Man]

So all you Scottish laddies how are the Saffers (Soon to be ex-Saffers) doing over there?

Josh 'Bluto' Strauss had a great start at Glasgow Warriors last season but this season he has been used as a battering ram only and he is better than that. Still is one of our best players but Toonie's plan B is give it to Bluto to smash it up the middle - err that's it really !

[AsLongAsBut100ofUs]

This isn't a drill - Richie Vernon is playing at centre on Saturday!!   

http://m.scotsman.com/sport/rugby/latest/richie-vernon-hopes-switch-to-centre-pays-off-1-3231829

Oh Curse my slow walk to work, was just about to post this but you beat me to it!

I sat down at my desk, looked up the news and burst out laughing, this is so ridiculous that a 606v2 suggestion has actually been put forward by professional coaches! Hats off to the first 606er to suggest it!

Is that a first?  New awards category = fES's most outrageous player switch suggestion?  

[21st Century Schizoid Man]

Talking of which, how is McInally doing at hooker for the MFLs ? Got to be better than Ford tbh !

[RDW]

Talking of which, how is McInally doing at hooker for the MFLs ?   Got to be better than Ford tbh !

He was injured for a while and has played maybe 3 or 4 games for Currie. Suspect we won't see him for Edinburgh until after the New Year.

[Tramptastic]

Talking of which, how is McInally doing at hooker for the MFLs ?   Got to be better than Ford tbh !

He was injured for a while and has played maybe 3 or 4 games for Currie.  Suspect we won't see him for Edinburgh  until after the New Year.

I work with a guy who is friends with him and Hidalgo-Clyne and apparently his throwing is terrible and he is bricking it! so decent around the field and can hook apparently, but throwing is terrible so when compared with ford that's 2/3s of the way to being a hooker rather than Fords 1/3 attempt

[BigGee]

This isn't a drill - Richie Vernon is playing at centre on Saturday!!   

http://m.scotsman.com/sport/rugby/latest/richie-vernon-hopes-switch-to-centre-pays-off-1-3231829

We may as well give him a try there. He is no where near getting a game in the back row at the moment unless we get a shed load of injuries. He must be behind Straus, Harley, Wilson and Eddie in the No.8/blind side role and behind the two open sides as well. That's not including playing Big Naka or Swinson in the back row.

Unfortunately for him he is just not big enough in the current world of giants and is never likely to be. He is certainly a quick and skilful player, there seems to be nothing to lose and these British and Irish cup games are a great testing ground.

I am probably a bit bias here but in my playing days I was a back row who often filled in at wing and centre. Clearly not at this sort of level but there are certainly similarities between the two positions, particularly open side and centre.

[21st Century Schizoid Man]

Talking of which, how is McInally doing at hooker for the MFLs ?   Got to be better than Ford tbh !

He was injured for a while and has played maybe 3 or 4 games for Currie.  Suspect we won't see him for Edinburgh  until after the New Year.

I work with a guy who is friends with him and Hidalgo-Clyne and apparently his throwing is terrible and he is bricking it! so decent around the field and can hook apparently, but throwing is terrible so when compared with ford that's 2/3s of the way to being a hooker rather than Fords 1/3 attempt

His throwing is worse than Ford's. FFS it must be really bad     

[Biltong]

So all you Scottish laddies how are the Saffers (Soon to be ex-Saffers) doing over there?

WP Nel is a regular starter at tighthead for Edinburgh but is still a little inconsistent in the scrums. Does pretty well on the whole.

Wicuus Blaauw has generally played regularly off the bench, and has done ok. Needs to lose a bit of weight though!

Isaak van bee vesthausen (sp?) has been a regular starter in the 2nd row and is now our lineout caller. He's generally been good, but I've been expecting a bit more from him.

Du preez has been outstanding - our best signing for a number if years. Scored a try 4 games in a row and adds real physicality despite being relatively small in modern back row terms. Very promising player.

Good stuff,

Isak van der Westhuizen.

[RDW]

So all you Scottish laddies how are the Saffers (Soon to be ex-Saffers) doing over there?

WP Nel is a regular starter at tighthead for Edinburgh but is still a little inconsistent in the scrums. Does pretty well on the whole.

Wicuus Blaauw has generally played regularly off the bench, and has done ok. Needs to lose a bit of weight though!

Isaak van bee vesthausen (sp?) has been a regular starter in the 2nd row and is now our lineout caller. He's generally been good, but I've been expecting a bit more from him.

Du preez has been outstanding - our best signing for a number if years. Scored a try 4 games in a row and adds real physicality despite being relatively small in modern back row terms. Very promising player.

Good stuff,

Isak van der Westhuizen.

I was close! And in my defence I was writing that on my phone with predictive text on the bus from Edinburgh to Glasgow...!

[Tramptastic]

Talking of which, how is McInally doing at hooker for the MFLs ?   Got to be better than Ford tbh !

He was injured for a while and has played maybe 3 or 4 games for Currie.  Suspect we won't see him for Edinburgh  until after the New Year.

I work with a guy who is friends with him and Hidalgo-Clyne and apparently his throwing is terrible and he is bricking it! so decent around the field and can hook apparently, but throwing is terrible so when compared with ford that's 2/3s of the way to being a hooker rather than Fords 1/3 attempt

His throwing is worse than Ford's.  FFS it must be really bad     

Och no, he didn't say it was THAT bad   

[George Carlin]

So all you Scottish laddies how are the Saffers (Soon to be ex-Saffers) doing over there?

WP Nel is a regular starter at tighthead for Edinburgh but is still a little inconsistent in the scrums. Does pretty well on the whole.

Wicuus Blaauw has generally played regularly off the bench, and has done ok. Needs to lose a bit of weight though!

Isaak van bee vesthausen (sp?) has been a regular starter in the 2nd row and is now our lineout caller. He's generally been good, but I've been expecting a bit more from him.

Du preez has been outstanding - our best signing for a number if years. Scored a try 4 games in a row and adds real physicality despite being relatively small in modern back row terms. Very promising player.

Good stuff,

Isak van der Westhuizen.

Bilt - on the Glasgow side, your former Currie Cup winning captain Mr Joshua Strauss has continued to be gigantic although perhaps matching the team in not having hit the heights of last season.

And DTH Van Der Merwe (whom I'm sure you will remind me was born in South Africa) is superb and currently the clubs historical top try scorer.

[RDW]

Has Strauss really been that good this year? From the games I’ve watched he’s been no where near as good as last year. He’s also not starting week in week out like last year – if he was that good he should be un-droppable!

Still think he’s a brilliant player but he’s one of the many Glasgow players who are performing good, but not great.

[21st Century Schizoid Man]

(Clean Shaven) Bluto Strauss is a terrific powerful back row player. This season he has been reduced to smash it up the middle when the Fijian madness abates and we are going nowhere. As I stated above - that is the sum total of Plan b for Toonie and co.

[funnyExiledScot]

I think Struass will benefit from Ryan Wilson coming back. It means the ball carrying is better shared, rather than simply falling on Strauss.

[tigertattie]

right you lot. I need banter!

Half the office is away on their various christmas do's, the other half (including me) is doing very very little work!

I need jokes, limericks, wee ditties, gossip, anything!!!

[RDW]

A Guy stuck his head into a barbershop and asked, 'How long before I can get a haircut?
The barber looked around the shop full of customers and said, 'About 2 hours.'
The guy left.
A few days later, the same guy stuck his head in the door and asked, 'How long before I can get a haircut?'
The barber looked around at the shop and said, 'About 3 hours.'
The guy left.
A week later, the same guy stuck his head in the shop and asked, 'How long before I can get a haircut?'
The barber looked around the shop and said, 'About an hour and a half'.
The guy left.
The barber turned to his friend and said, 'Hey, Bob, do me a favour , follow him and see where he goes. He keeps asking how long he has to wait for a haircut, but he never comes back.'
A little while later, Bob returned to the shop, laughing hysterically.
The barber asked, 'So, where does he go when he leaves?'
Bob looked up, wiped the tears from his eyes and said....
'Your house'

[tigertattie]

haaaaaaaa   

Nice one RDW. never heard that before!

cheered this dull friday afternoon up a bit  

[jimbopip]

Here's another one Tiger, even with Richie Vee at 13 Atiga will still get a showing up in the festive Slaughter of the Effeminates.

[tigertattie]

ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Vernon is the answer at centre for Scotland so :p

[jimbopip]

As someone said in the 80's ,"If Thatcherism is the answer...it must have been a bloody stupid question."

[21st Century Schizoid Man]

Ah 'Yes Indeed ! ' as Ben Elton used to say

[Biltong]

I have always rated Josh Strauss, he is a magnificent player, you guys are blessed to have him.

[RDW]

Anyone watch Greig Laidlaw on question of sport??

[RDW]

FFS Glasgow - such an opportunity to finally do something in Europe and they mess it up again. Fair enough losing away from home last week, but this was a home game against a Blues team missing a large number of players. And let's face it Glasgow were rubbish. Rubbish last week, rubbish this week. Good scrum, that's about it!

If this was Edinburgh losing everyone on here would be saying 'useless bunch of pansies', 'MFL fail once again' - there's something not right with Glasgow just now and they are most definitely not living up to their bunch of hardmen with the All blacks skills reputation that some people seem to think.

The 1872 is gearing up to be an awful, awful spectacle. And I tell you what - there's nothing Edinburgh should fear about this Glasgow team just now. Two poor teams rolling around in the mud showing poor skills and terrible rugby - and then we need to suddenly expect them to lift their game for the 6N!  

Massively frustrated with Glasgow just now!!!!   

[TJ]

This isn't a drill - Richie Vernon is playing at centre on Saturday!!   

http://m.scotsman.com/sport/rugby/latest/richie-vernon-hopes-switch-to-centre-pays-off-1-3231829

Oh Curse my slow walk to work, was just about to post this but you beat me to it!

I sat down at my desk, looked up the news and burst out laughing, this is so ridiculous that a 606v2 suggestion has actually been put forward by professional coaches! Hats off to the first 606er to suggest it!

Me me me me - It was my idea

[Guest]

FFS Glasgow - such an opportunity to finally do something in Europe and they mess it up again.  Fair enough losing away from home last week, but this was a home game against a Blues team missing a large number of players.  And let's face it Glasgow were rubbish.  Rubbish last week, rubbish this week.  Good scrum, that's about it!

If this was Edinburgh losing everyone on here would be saying 'useless bunch of pansies', 'MFL fail once again' - there's something not right with Glasgow just now and they are most definitely not living up to their bunch of hardmen with the All blacks skills reputation that some people seem to think.

The 1872 is gearing up to be an awful, awful spectacle.  And I tell you what - there's nothing Edinburgh should fear about this Glasgow team just now. Two poor teams rolling around in the mud showing poor skills and terrible rugby - and then we need to suddenly expect them to lift their game for the 6N!  

Massively frustrated with Glasgow just now!!!!   

Seems about right.

I've said it for years, Scottish rugby needs some good psychological coaching first and foremost. I'm deadly serious. Sean Maitland, the man not long ago (REALISTICALLY) hoping to play for the ABs, is dropping simple passes several times in a match now. If that doesn't say it I don't know what will.

[Guest]

Forget the 6N. Interim coach who's successes so far amount to

a) A good home win & scraped win on neutral ground over Italy
b) Squeaky bum home win over Ireland (and frankly Japan)
c) Managing to make a test rugby match that is within a score still obviously over by the 50th minute (Scot v Aus ; who actually thought we were going to win that despite the small margin?)
d) Never playing our main captain in position

with our first fixture against a firing Ireland, away, who will have something to prove after last year, when our only glimmers of hope from last season are not playing well (with exception, granted, to Matt Scott - 12) no real solution to our breakdown problems that we were once so good at, no guarantee we will win our own lineouts or have a composed 10 (unless we rekindle the Laidlaw experiment - not a bad option right now) where a large number of internationals just got beaten at home by a second string Cardiff side ??

Hope Scott Johnson has got some vats of soup ready because that spoon's gonna get a stirrin'

[21st Century Schizoid Man]

Yes Scottish rugby is hitting the fecken skids big time. Schieze ,rubbish coaches and feckin schieze, rubbish players. I feckin give up Baws to you all >

[sensisball]

Never mind Schiz, the SRU will do the right thing and recognise that Toonie is a loony and has no ideas how to select/coach other than buy as many Fijian players as possible, for front five positions, as well as in the backs and let them win the game on their own. If not the team can throw the ball about with gay abandon until the opposition turn it over or win a penalty.
Unfortunately this reality wont dawn on the old farts until 2020!

[RDW]

I'll say it again - this mass rotation isn't helping Glasgow - look what it did to Edinburgh under Moffat and Bradley.

Has there been two games in a row yet where the same backrow and halfbacks have started?

Why pick Weir for one week the bring Jackson in?

[TheMildlyFranticLlama]

Christ it's bleak in here, just to lighten things up a touch - hopefully this hasn't been posted already - but like a fine wine Marcus Di Rollo clearly gets better with age, and as a stand off no less! Not so much a case of 'still got it' as 'finally starting to find it' perhaps! Good to see the Hadden and Di Rollo team taking the world by storm   

http://www.scotsman.com/sport/rugby/latest/di-rollo-hails-age-as-veterans-defend-dubai-title-1-3216591

[21st Century Schizoid Man]

Never mind Schiz, the SRU will do the right thing and recognise that Toonie is a loony and has no ideas how to select/coach other than buy as many Fijian players as possible, for front five positions, as well as in the backs and let them win the game on their own. If not the team can throw the ball about with gay abandon until the opposition turn it over or win a penalty.
Unfortunately this reality wont dawn on the old farts until 2020!

Quite Sensi - that is exactly what will happen.

[RDW]

Some harsh realities from Ian Morrison in the Scotsman:

IT’S a funny old business, sport. It’s not so much that the worm turns – that much is inevitable – it’s the speed at which it spins and it’s been whirring round like a Catherine Wheel in recent weeks.


After the first round of the Heineken Cup, the Cardiff Blues coach Phil Davies was on the rack after his team had conceded six tries in a hopelessly one-sided European tie against Exeter at Sandy Park. Were you to read the Welsh press you would stake the last pound in your pocket on Davies being shown the door.

A couple of months later and Davies is being feted in the streets of Cardiff following back-to-back victories over Glasgow. Sport is a zero-sum game, for every winner there is an equal and opposite loser, and right now Gregor Townsend is experiencing the flip side of the coin. In effect the two are seated on some sort of cosmic see-saw.

Glasgow are out of Europe, which is a pity after so much promise – and such an easy pool that Big Al Kellock might have made the draw himself.

Worse than the fact of their exit was the manner of it: they left with a whimper. As one of the Blues management put it after Friday’s grim 9-7 defeat for the Warriors: “You’d be a bit miffed if you’d just subscribed to Sky TV and then got that match to watch.”

In tricky conditions that saw a stiff breeze (Rhys Patchell kicked a 52-metre penalty for the Blues that cleared the bar by five feet) and periodic rain, Glasgow scored the only try of the night.

Both Duncan Weir and Ruaridh Jackson missed penalties inside the final few minutes to snatch the win but the match was won and lost in the ten minutes before half time when Glasgow dominated nine exhausting scrums and came away empty handed.

Townsend was bleating about Niko Matawalu’s try that was wiped off because Rob Harley took out Patchell off the ball but the TMO, the referee and commentator Stuart Barnes all disagreed.

Where Townsend might have found more traction was in the scrums, where the fifth one saw Pascal Gauzere yellow card Cardiff’s skipper, prop Sam Hobbs. But the French referee failed to add the very obvious penalty try as a result. In that respect Glasgow were unlucky – it was Friday 13th after all – in all other respects they got what they deserved.

The team is not just losing, it is losing to sides that Glasgow would expect to beat in their sleep. Instead they look to be testing that theory by sleepwalking through matches. Glasgow did not lose a match at Scotstoun from 7 December 2012 (against Castres) all the way through to 25 October 2013 (against Munster). Since then they have lost two successive games at home against the weakest Welsh regions. Up to and including the Munster match, Glasgow had lost two games in eight. Since then they have lost three from five.

Something is clearly amiss and you don’t need to be Sigmund Freud to suggest that, with much the same personnel still taking the field, the problem may be in the head.

On Thursday, Glasgow flanker Ryan Wilson appeared in private at Glasgow Sheriff Court charged with assaulting another player in the city’s west end. Wilson, 24, is alleged to have assaulted 29-year-old Ally Maclay, who plays for Glasgow Hawks, on Great Western Road on 27 October.

He made no plea or declaration and was granted bail by Sheriff Ian Miller.

After Friday’s match Townsend was asked if the court appearance had had an effect on the Warriors team.

“No,” was his brief reply.

The question was repeated several times and Townsend repeated the answer with mounting impatience.

If the incident has not yet impacted on this squad, as Townsend argues, then heaven help Glasgow when it does.

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