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The Culture Cup Round x - Adam is a naughty naughty boy

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Post by Guest Fri 06 Nov 2015, 12:22 pm

First topic message reminder :

The Loaded Dog wrote:I haven't seen Altar of Plagues but my dentist reckons they're OK.
It's disappointing on so many levels, LD.

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Post by seanmichaels Thu 12 Nov 2015, 8:19 am

Oooops. He's dead...

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 12 Nov 2015, 8:25 am

rick_dagless wrote:
Tino wrote:Met someone from Warrington last night. Always nice to hear a friendly voice.

Were they trying to mug you at all?  Or were they lost and turned up at Tino's "Embassy for the North"?

I've taken the rather courageous step of joining the rugby team (second team, I'm not stupid) after 'helping' them a couple of times recently.

Went to training last night. New guy turns up. I took an instant dislike to him which I tend to do with everyone I meet, but then I heard him talk. Realised he was north west somewhere and turns out he is from Warrington. Moved down here recently with his job. Only ever played league, but we don't have a league team round here so he is trying union.

He was a nice guy. I asked him if he knew you (he didn't) or if he had been to The View (he hadn't).

Mind the windows Tino.
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Post by rIck_dAgless Thu 12 Nov 2015, 8:40 am

Fair play TINo, I have been invited to a gentlemans lunch at a local rugby club up here, I was hoping to ask someone what goes on at such events.

I was initially thiking sean may have had experience with such things, but you seem better placed.

I hope you are assisting the Man of the North in settling in to the odd southern ways?

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 12 Nov 2015, 8:45 am

rick_dagless wrote:Fair play TINo, I have been invited to a gentlemans lunch at a local rugby club up here, I was hoping to ask someone what goes on at such events.

I was initially thiking sean may have had experience with such things, but you seem better placed.

I hope you are assisting the Man of the North in settling in to the odd southern ways?

Sean only has experience of celebrity sh*gging. If Sonia from Eastenders is going, he is your man for advice.

I've offered to help him, RicK. I gave him a few phrases like 'don't mug me off', 'you want some you slaaag' and 'pass me another Babycham please darling'. I also warned him never to smile at a southerner unless you're sure you know them. Smiling at a southerner you don't know can lead to immediate arrest.

Mind the windows Tino.
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Post by seanmichaels Thu 12 Nov 2015, 8:54 am

I went to a Gentleman's Rugby dinner at my old school a few years back. John Inverdale was the compere and Martin Bayfield and Iain Robertson spoke. Bayfield very funny.

I think you just need to drink Guinness rick. And laugh raucously. No food fights.

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Post by rIck_dAgless Thu 12 Nov 2015, 9:00 am

Sound advice Tino, add in the tepid, headless ale and buses that bend for the sake of F*ck and he is there.

Cheers sean, I don't think there are any guest speakers to be honest, but I can force a Guiness in if pushed, and knock out a guffaw.

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Post by seanmichaels Thu 12 Nov 2015, 9:02 am

Loud farting in the toilets is also appreciated.

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Post by rIck_dAgless Thu 12 Nov 2015, 9:10 am

Words to live by sean...

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Post by seanmichaels Thu 12 Nov 2015, 9:12 am

I am not a fan of flatulence in public. It is beneath me.

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Post by ShahenshahG Thu 12 Nov 2015, 9:16 am

seanmichaels wrote:I am not a fan of flatulence in public. It is beneath me.

You're not fooling anyone, we know that's Apollo 13 trying to go where many men have gone before.

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 12 Nov 2015, 10:08 am

Michaelsed.

Mind the windows Tino.
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Post by seanmichaels Thu 12 Nov 2015, 10:11 am

Close to 16k there windows.

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 12 Nov 2015, 10:14 am

seanmichaels wrote:Close to 16k there windows.

Oh yeah. Didn't notice.

I'll have to make it a special one.

Mind the windows Tino.
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Post by JuliusHMarx Thu 12 Nov 2015, 10:25 am

seanmichaels wrote:Close to 16k there windows.

I wasted my 14000 yesterday on some tennis modding. It's a cruel sport.

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 12 Nov 2015, 10:29 am

JuliusHMarx wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Close to 16k there windows.

I wasted my 14000 yesterday on some tennis modding. It's a cruel sport.

I'll try to make it up to you with my 16k, Jules.

You can live your life vicariously through me.

Mind the windows Tino.
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Post by Pal Joey Thu 12 Nov 2015, 10:35 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Close to 16k there windows.

I wasted my 14000 yesterday on some tennis modding. It's a cruel sport.

I'll try to make it up to you with my 16k, Jules.

You can live your life vicariously through me.

I wasted my 45900 on "heave".
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Post by seanmichaels Thu 12 Nov 2015, 10:38 am

I see fury has finally become certifiable. When is the fight?

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 12 Nov 2015, 10:44 am

seanmichaels wrote:I see fury has finally become certifiable. When is the fight?

I think it's Saturday but I refuse to watch it on PPV. I pretty much refuse to pay for any PPV these days. None of them are worth it.

Mind the windows Tino.
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Post by Pal Joey Thu 12 Nov 2015, 10:51 am

Yeah, I think I'm gonna ditch Foxtel here.

There's less decent sport on this time of year, I've seen some documentaries 3 or 4 times already and I've noticed some sloppy descriptions on the info button like "European Women's Volleyball" (no mention of who's playing who) and on the classic movie channel there is some chap named "English Mono" who seems to have starred in lots of flicks. I couldn't find a mention of him on IMDB.
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Post by seanmichaels Thu 12 Nov 2015, 10:58 am

Fortnight Saturday.

I doubt my TV service will be up by then regardless of whether i could order it

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Post by Pal Joey Thu 12 Nov 2015, 11:09 am

seanmichaels wrote:Fortnight Saturday.

I doubt my TV service will be up by then regardless of whether i could order it

Do you have to pay a month in advance?
If so, when does the service start ticking... from the signing of the agreement or when you finally get hooked up?
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Post by JuliusHMarx Thu 12 Nov 2015, 11:13 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Close to 16k there windows.

I wasted my 14000 yesterday on some tennis modding. It's a cruel sport.

I'll try to make it up to you with my 16k, Jules.

You can live your life vicariously through me.

OK - make sure you get Prince tickets for B'ham Symphony Hall.

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Post by seanmichaels Thu 12 Nov 2015, 11:20 am

Not sure. I don't think I have been billed yet. Internet is up but only the crappy one. Fibre optic was available but they ballsed it up again. They are going to get that installed then sort the TV.

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Post by Rowley Thu 12 Nov 2015, 12:19 pm

You're all welcome to mine to watch the Fury fight. Tina has the address.

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Post by JuliusHMarx Thu 12 Nov 2015, 12:22 pm

Rowley wrote:You're all welcome to mine to watch the Fury fight. Tina has the address.

Sorry, I'm washing my hair that evening.
When is it?

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Post by Pal Joey Thu 12 Nov 2015, 12:29 pm

JuliusHMarx wrote:
Rowley wrote:You're all welcome to mine to watch the Fury fight. Tina has the address.

Sorry, I'm washing my hair that evening.
When is it?

Thanks Jeff but I'm having a Chinese that night.
Where is it?
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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 12 Nov 2015, 12:36 pm

You lot are cruel.

I'll be there Jeff. I'll even pay half the PPV for you.

I'll bring some prostitutes and cocaine. We can make an evening of it.

Mind the windows Tino.
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Post by Pal Joey Thu 12 Nov 2015, 12:38 pm

Front or back Tino? The snorting.
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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 12 Nov 2015, 12:39 pm

The Loaded Dog wrote:Front or back Tino? The snorting.

I reckon Jeff has quite a hirsute back so I think I'll have to go front on.

Mind the windows Tino.
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Post by Pal Joey Thu 12 Nov 2015, 12:43 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
The Loaded Dog wrote:Front or back Tino? The snorting.

I reckon Jeff has quite a hirsute back so I think I'll have to go front on.

The prostitutes can take the videos of it and post it on youtube then. It will be a sight for sore eyes.
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Post by Rowley Thu 12 Nov 2015, 12:47 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
The Loaded Dog wrote:Front or back Tino? The snorting.

I reckon Jeff has quite a hirsute back so I think I'll have to go front on.

You're not wrong re. the back.

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Post by Pal Joey Thu 12 Nov 2015, 12:50 pm

Short coarse and prickly black hair or fine wispy light brown baby hair, Jeff?
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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 12 Nov 2015, 1:00 pm

I bet you've got a hairy body, LD?

Proper Aussie style.  Pair of sandals, cut off jeans, vest with your chest hair poking out, hat with corks on string round it?

If I ever come to Australia, I am coming round your gaff for swim in your pool.  We can go out hunting funnel webs together.  Wrangling snakes.  Eating crocodile steaks in the bush.

You're my favourite person in the whole southern hemisphere.

Mind the windows Tino.
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Post by seanmichaels Thu 12 Nov 2015, 1:10 pm

Spoiler:
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Last edited by seanmichaels on Thu 12 Nov 2015, 1:12 pm; edited 1 time in total

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Post by Pal Joey Thu 12 Nov 2015, 1:11 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:I bet you've got a hairy body, LD?

Proper Aussie style.  Pair of sandals, cut off jeans, vest with your chest hair poking out, hat with corks on string round it?

If I ever come to Australia, I am coming round your gaff for swim in your pool.  We can go out hunting funnel webs together.  Wrangling snakes.  Eating crocodile steaks in the bush.

You're my favourite person in the whole southern hemisphere.

Almost spot on. My lower back hair is of the wispy variety though. The other half is amused by it for some reason.

You're welcome to drop in any time, Tino. Sure, I can show you some of our venomous wildlife.
Same goes for anyone on here.

Ha ha sean. I wish!
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Post by seanmichaels Thu 12 Nov 2015, 1:18 pm

I joked about snorting cocaine off one of the younger cricketers girl's ar5e (she's aged 19, Ferrari chassis, fantastic set of shelves) with some of the older chaps the other day. It actually became a really erotic thought for an off the cuff comment.

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Post by rIck_dAgless Thu 12 Nov 2015, 1:30 pm

sean wrote:I joked about snorting cocaine off one of the younger cricketers girl's ar5e (she's aged 19, Ferrari chassis, fantastic set of shelves) with some of the older chaps the other day. It actually became a really erotic thought for an off the cuff comment.

You available for stand up for kids parties sean?

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Post by Guest Thu 12 Nov 2015, 1:46 pm

Afternoon all. Been to the doc's again and informed that my ear infection is still running rampant. MORE antibiotics so, off the beer again...bloody hell, I've just done Sober for October.

I want to go to Tina's house to watch Fury get beaten. It would be a lovely experience (for me at least, he's my favourite, I don't know if I've mentioned it, it used to be Galted briefly but he went all weird he unnerves me these days. Generally I have an ambivalence to everyone, but I like Tina). However, I'm off to see SLAYER in Leeds that night so that obviously takes precedence..

In an ideal world, SLAYER would finish their set, Tom Araya would say, "Thank You, Good night" and over in Germany at that precise moment, Wlad would be landing a huge right hand on Fury's chin.

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Post by seanmichaels Thu 12 Nov 2015, 1:54 pm

rick_dagless wrote:
sean wrote:I joked about snorting cocaine off one of the younger cricketers girl's ar5e (she's aged 19, Ferrari chassis, fantastic set of shelves) with some of the older chaps the other day. It actually became a really erotic thought for an off the cuff comment.

You available for stand up for kids parties sean?

It was in the context of a 'everyone seems to be doing cocaine nowadays' conversation and the merits of us starting a habit.

Was watching offensive jokes on youtube the other day. Frankie Boyle's on the Diana tribute was ridiculous. 'They should have done something that gave a true reflection of her life. Like organise a gangbang in a minefield.'

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Post by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 12 Nov 2015, 3:25 pm

Sean kills another one.

Mind the windows Tino.
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Post by ShahenshahG Thu 12 Nov 2015, 3:27 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:Sean kills another one.

Aids is a motherf*cker

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Post by seanmichaels Thu 12 Nov 2015, 3:45 pm

Yahoo

http://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2015/nov/12/gayle-newland-sentenced-eight-years-prison-duping-friend-having-sex

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Post by seanmichaels Thu 12 Nov 2015, 3:50 pm

There is no way you would let someone turn up and nob you without seeing their face! And surely you can tell artificial?

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Post by seanmichaels Thu 12 Nov 2015, 3:56 pm

"At some stage you acquired a prosthetic strap on Winkle to allow you to penetrate her vagina which you did on up to ten occasions when you met at her flat in Chester.

"You acquired the object for you to use on her and she was successfully deceived into believing this was full sexual intercourse with a man and nothing less.

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Post by seanmichaels Thu 12 Nov 2015, 3:58 pm

"As X said to the jury ‘I know it sounds pathetic but I was just so happy at the time because I was in love with this person and we’d built this beautiful relationship that wasn’t on anything like that – it was just based on you know our minds and all the other things that we had in common so I just felt grateful that I’d finally got a proper relationship.’

You were blindfolded you mong!!!

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Post by Rowley Thu 12 Nov 2015, 7:20 pm

Is this what has become of the once proud CC ? Sean talking to himself.

Disappointing

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Post by seanmichaels Thu 12 Nov 2015, 9:52 pm

Cooked a laksa for her tonight. Good company but it will take an absolute beauty for me to get with a bird here on in.

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Post by Galted Thu 12 Nov 2015, 10:10 pm

DAVE667 wrote:

I want to go to Tina's house to watch Fury get beaten. It would be a lovely experience (for me at least, he's my favourite, I don't know if I've mentioned it, it used to be Galted briefly but he went all weird he unnerves me these days.

Well sod you then, you can dig out the crawlspace under the porch on your own in future.
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Post by ShahenshahG Fri 13 Nov 2015, 6:36 am

Fist bitches.

Day 1 of trading didn't go well. made 8 pounds profit on brent oil then lost 14 on heating oil!

F*cking freezing this morning.

Good morning Rick the stick

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Post by ShahenshahG Fri 13 Nov 2015, 7:15 am

This week
was tough
so he's in Chick dagless' muff
Ricko
Ricko

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