Friday Fun - Boxing Limericks

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There is more than a lisp to Chris Eubank
Said Benn, climbing out of a poo tank
As when not in a ring
He jutht loveth to thing

Some say boxing's best days are over
It's the same for Navratilova
No more serve and volley
chasing young girls would be folly

Some say boxing's best days are over
It's the same for Navratilova
No more serve and volley
Chasing young girls would be folly
Too old to play the wild rover

A middle ageing guy from Massachussets
Often seen in weightlifting corsets
His buttocks are perk
Some think he's a berk
and union insists his wife has got loose bits........

Michaels, Sean wrote:A middle ageing guy from Massachussets
Often seen in weightlifting corsets
His buttocks are perk
Some think he's a berk
and union insists his wife has got loose bits........

Who might you mean Michaels, Sean?

Who might you mean Michaels, Sean?
A man of Boston he was born

Who might you mean Michaels, Sean?
A man of Boston he was born
Of Irish descent

Who might you mean Michaels, Sean?
A man of Boston he was born
Of Irish descent
Its rumoured he's bent
And his wife stars in home-made porn

Just looked at the old 606

Just looked at the old 606
Shantel still up to his tricks ?

Just looked at the old 606
Shantel still up to his tricks ?
It sure looks that way

Just looked at the old 606
Shantel still up to his tricks ?
With a few footy fans
Jabbering on about Khan

Just looked at the old 606
Shantel still up to his tricks ?
With a few footy fans
Jabbering on about Khan
And they don't even have limericks

Just looked at the old 606
Shantel still up to his tricks ?
It sure looks that way
And there he will stay
If he comes back - banned in a tick

ITV4 are showing the cricket

ITV4 are showing the cricket
That saves me buying a ticket

ITV4 are showing the cricket
That saves me buying a ticket
Swing bowling, thick edges

ITV4 are showing the cricket
That saves me buying a ticket
Swing bowling, thick edges
Warne's wig, one alleges

ITV4 are showing the cricket
That saves me buying a ticket
Swing bowling, thick edges
Warne's wig, one alleges
Stays fast, he knows how to stick it

I knew a chap, name of Roger

he had a tiny todger

I knew a chap, name of Roger
he had a tiny todger
But luckily for him

I knew a chap, name of Roger
he had a tiny todger
But luckily for him
Next door neighbour Jim

Was a right ol' podger

All day I have missed the old limericks

All day I have missed the old limericks
Shouldn't have carried on without him, pricks!

All day I have missed the old limericks
Shouldn't have carried on without him, pricks!
John, that seems a bit odd
be aware of the mods
(Mind you, they let D4 do that old schtick....)

Well the mods they can fry!
As I'm sure they'll say can I
So roast all people
and then have a nibble
it's about time we all die!!!!!!!!!

RAAAAAAAHHH

Chris Eubank is a dapper old dresser,

Chris Eubank is a dapper old dresser,
Naomi is a slapper and aggressor

Chris Eubank is a dapper old dresser,
Naomi is a slapper and aggressor
Ones a big trucker

Chris Eubank is a dapper old dresser,
Naomi is a slapper and aggressor
Ones a big trucker
The other ? I'd chuck her

Chris Eubank is a dapper old dresser,
Naomi is a slapper and aggressor
Ones a big trucker
The other ? I'd chuck her
If it's Watts and not Campbell then Yessir!

We got out of that one intact

We got out of that one intact
It was tempting you know, that's a fact

We got out of that one intact
It was tempting you know, that's a fact
I changed the line twice

We got out of that one intact
It was tempting you know, that's a fact
I changed the line twice
Were you keeping it nice?

We got out of that one intact
It was tempting you know, that's a fact
I changed the line twice
Were you keeping it nice?
Of course ! With restraint and with tact

Interesting to read the one about Warne's hair
Same could be said about Vaughan to be fair

Interesting to read the one about Warne's hair
Same could be said about Vaughan to be fair
With a disused mop
and UHU to stick it on top
If only someone could tell Darryl Hare

This thread's been on the go for three weeks

Sean, you start and you finish 'em
No probs though, it doesn't diminish 'em
They're sharp and they're funny
And right on the money
Time, methinks, to replenish 'em

This thread's been on the go for three weeks
Who's complaining, when the majority speaks ?

This thread's been on the go for three weeks
Who's complaining, when the majority speaks ?
Didn't think it would last

This thread's been on the go for three weeks
Who's complaining, when the majority speaks ?
Didn't think it would last
That the novelty has passed?

This thread's been on the go for three weeks
Who's complaining, when the majority speaks ?
Didn't think it would last
That the novelty has passed?
Not a chance, just wait till it peaks

There was once an old man called Arum

There was once an old man called Arum
Who made young Floyd feel a bit glum

So Floyd jumped ship Golden Boy

There was once an old man called Arum
Who made young Floyd feel a bit glum
So Floyd jumped ship Golden Boy

There was once an old man called Arum
Who made young Floyd feel a bit glum
So Floyd jumped ship Golden Boy
In a moment of special ' that told ' em ' joy