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Infin / itive

Before:

perigee-syzygy eclipse:

Taken with my little iPhone camera. Looked more impressive to the naked eye. I've never seen those light rays from the moon before.

You're next!:

Fire, floods, minor covid, China export bans, eclipse and now a possible mouse plague - if a couple manage to hitchhike on a truck for 10 hours.

What's next?

Pal Joey wrote:

Before:

perigee-syzygy eclipse:

Taken with my little iPhone camera. Looked more impressive to the naked eye. I've never seen those light rays from the moon before.

You're next!:

Fire, floods, minor covid, China export bans, eclipse and now a possible mouse plague - if a couple manage to hitchhike on a truck for 10 hours.

What's next?

I think Australia has the natural defences to cope with a mouse plague. It'll turn into one almighty feeding frenzy.

Problem is there was record crop growth after the heavy rain inland. I would have thought many would have drowned or got swept away but those that survived feasted on the bumper wheat crop. Then a huge population explosion occurred when we had very pleasant conditions throughout autumn.

Some of those images of mice pouring out of grain storage bins reminds me of the hordes of zombies in Days Gone.

Poisoning is out of the question apparently because that would cause slow and agonisingly painful deaths for many owls, eagles and snakes.
So I guess we're pretty much totally phucked unless there is another significant 'natural' event. Shouldn't have murdered those millions of feral cats.

Maybe some feral kids could set alight hundreds of thousands of acres of wheat fields in their area... for a school project? That'll solve the problem.

Pal Joey wrote:Problem is there was record crop growth after the heavy rain inland. I would have thought many would have drowned or got swept away but those that survived feasted on the bumper wheat crop. Then a huge population explosion occurred when we had very pleasant conditions throughout autumn.

Some of those images of mice pouring out of grain storage bins reminds me of the hordes of zombies in Days Gone.

Poisoning is out of the question apparently because that would cause slow and agonisingly painful deaths for many owls, eagles and snakes.
So I guess we're pretty much totally phucked unless there is another significant 'natural' event.

Maybe some feral kids could set alight hundreds of thousands of acres of wheat fields in their area... for a school project? That'll solve the problem.

Can't you just release billions of cats into the streets to eat the mice. Then when that is done, release a load of dogs to eat the cats.

l*l

I think even our cats are too politically correct now, Tino.
They would simply tap them on the tail and then look around to see if a social counsellor was watching their every move. We've all gone too soft.

Pal Joey wrote:l*l

I think even our cats are too politically correct now, Tino.
They would simply tap them on the tail and then look around to see if a social counsellor was watching their every move. We've all gone too soft.

The world is in big trouble if even the Aussies (and their animal kingdom) have gone soft.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Pal Joey wrote:l*l

I think even our cats are too politically correct now, Tino.
They would simply tap them on the tail and then look around to see if a social counsellor was watching their every move. We've all gone too soft.

The world is in big trouble if even the Aussies (and their animal kingdom) have gone soft.

If we could somehow corral them and pack them into shipping containers bound for the South China Sea. Kill two birds with one stone by averting the invasion of Taiwan whilst providing a ready and plentiful source of protein for the fishing fleet crews.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Galted wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Galted wrote:Why haven't you denied being Sasha Johnson?

Because I don't know who that is.

Racist.

How dare you. Some of my best friends have been shot in the head.

Have you had your FAC removed yet?

Fist.
Think I've got it right this time. Tino was Eric Carle. Who else could write so well about caterpillars?

Sicond

He was doing well for a 91yr old

JuliusHMarx wrote:Fist.
Think I've got it right this time. Tino was Eric Carle. Who else could write so well about caterpillars?

And eating.

Tird

JuliusHMarx wrote:Fist.
Think I've got it right this time. Tino was Eric Carle. Who else could write so well about caterpillars?

A plausible theory although I fancy that Tino would write a more fact-based account of the life of a caterpillar.  Carle's caterpillar ate it's way through 5 oranges, a piece of cake and a slice of salami, amongst other things.  Window's caterpillar would almost certainly eat nothing but leaves until it was devoured by a paper wasp.

Galted wrote:

JuliusHMarx wrote:Fist.
Think I've got it right this time. Tino was Eric Carle. Who else could write so well about caterpillars?

A plausible theory although I fancy that Tino would write a more fact-based account of the life of a caterpillar.  Carle's caterpillar ate it's way through 5 oranges, a piece of cake and a slice of salami, amongst other things.  Window's caterpillar would almost certainly eat nothing but leaves until it was devoured by a paper wasp.

I make you correct, G-Unit.

I have read the book countless times over the years and got progressively more angry at the inaccuracies contained within. I tried to substitute it with a factual book about the Large Blue butterfly and the remarkable life cycle of the larva that spends a year growing in the middle of an ants nest.

Fascinating stuff but the kids were not interested and that is why I don't really like any of them.

The Large Blue is a conservation success story as well.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Galted wrote:

JuliusHMarx wrote:Fist.
Think I've got it right this time. Tino was Eric Carle. Who else could write so well about caterpillars?

A plausible theory although I fancy that Tino would write a more fact-based account of the life of a caterpillar.  Carle's caterpillar ate it's way through 5 oranges, a piece of cake and a slice of salami, amongst other things.  Window's caterpillar would almost certainly eat nothing but leaves until it was devoured by a paper wasp.

I make you correct, G-Unit.

I have read the book countless times over the years and got progressively more angry at the inaccuracies contained within. I tried to substitute it with a factual book about the Large Blue butterfly and the remarkable life cycle of the larva that spends a year growing in the middle of an ants nest.

Fascinating stuff but the kids were not interested and that is why I don't really like any of them.

The Large Blue is a conservation success story as well.

Having similar problems.  My son points out the elephant and rhino in his animal book and says 'wooly mammoth' and 'wooly rhino' no matter how aggressively I correct him.  Haven't resorted to violence yet but it is an option.  He also has a toy hyena which he calls a dog and says 'woof woof' when they are clearly not dogs and make a rising 'rooooooooooooooooooop' sound.  As if that's not bad enough he refers to hippos as 'pigs', though I do suspect that he knows better and is just winding me up.

Galted wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Galted wrote:

JuliusHMarx wrote:Fist.
Think I've got it right this time. Tino was Eric Carle. Who else could write so well about caterpillars?

A plausible theory although I fancy that Tino would write a more fact-based account of the life of a caterpillar.  Carle's caterpillar ate it's way through 5 oranges, a piece of cake and a slice of salami, amongst other things.  Window's caterpillar would almost certainly eat nothing but leaves until it was devoured by a paper wasp.

I make you correct, G-Unit.

I have read the book countless times over the years and got progressively more angry at the inaccuracies contained within. I tried to substitute it with a factual book about the Large Blue butterfly and the remarkable life cycle of the larva that spends a year growing in the middle of an ants nest.

Fascinating stuff but the kids were not interested and that is why I don't really like any of them.

The Large Blue is a conservation success story as well.

Having similar problems.  My son points out the elephant and rhino in his animal book and says 'wooly mammoth' and 'wooly rhino' no matter how aggressively I correct him.  Haven't resorted to violence yet but it is an option.  He also has a toy hyena which he calls a dog and says 'woof woof' when they are clearly not dogs and make a rising 'rooooooooooooooooooop' sound.  As if that's not bad enough he refers to hippos as 'pigs', though I do suspect that he knows better and is just winding me up.

Teenagers eh

lostinwales wrote:

Galted wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Galted wrote:

JuliusHMarx wrote:Fist.
Think I've got it right this time. Tino was Eric Carle. Who else could write so well about caterpillars?

A plausible theory although I fancy that Tino would write a more fact-based account of the life of a caterpillar.  Carle's caterpillar ate it's way through 5 oranges, a piece of cake and a slice of salami, amongst other things.  Window's caterpillar would almost certainly eat nothing but leaves until it was devoured by a paper wasp.

I make you correct, G-Unit.

I have read the book countless times over the years and got progressively more angry at the inaccuracies contained within. I tried to substitute it with a factual book about the Large Blue butterfly and the remarkable life cycle of the larva that spends a year growing in the middle of an ants nest.

Fascinating stuff but the kids were not interested and that is why I don't really like any of them.

The Large Blue is a conservation success story as well.

Having similar problems.  My son points out the elephant and rhino in his animal book and says 'wooly mammoth' and 'wooly rhino' no matter how aggressively I correct him.  Haven't resorted to violence yet but it is an option.  He also has a toy hyena which he calls a dog and says 'woof woof' when they are clearly not dogs and make a rising 'rooooooooooooooooooop' sound.  As if that's not bad enough he refers to hippos as 'pigs', though I do suspect that he knows better and is just winding me up.

Teenagers eh

FriYAY! Fist

Ooooh, sicond!

The Reddit thread about James Corden I posted in the cup, is golden if you're bored this morning, mate.

Cheers, have had a look. Would have voted for him if I'd read it first. What a prize c*nt.

It's never to late to realise someone is a c**t, Galts

The competition has certainly opened my eyes.

Galted wrote:The competition has certainly opened my eyes.

I've literally (correct use) never been on Reddit. I only knew it was a thing when they shorted those stocks the other month and it was on the main news.

I'm not sure I want my first visit to be about James Corden.

It's worth it TiNo.

$hit on here today.

When did Superfly die? Shame I missed it.

By the way I am not dead

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:When did Superfly die? Shame I missed it.

It's a shame we all missed it my operative in the Scottish Parliament assures me it was hilarious. He said he walked in on superfly kneeling in front of sturgeon with her back against the wall and upon hearing my operative scream in horror and disgust shot upwards and got stuck inside like mr bean with a Christmas turkey then ran around aimlessly until he collapsed from the lack of air and the weight of a screaming Scotswoman. Apparently he died en route to emergency surgery. I'm not sure if this will provide comfort to his family but when they finally managed to remove his head it was red white and blue. A unionist to the end.

ShahenshahG wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:When did Superfly die? Shame I missed it.

It's a shame we all missed it my operative in the Scottish Parliament assures me it was hilarious. He said he walked in on superfly kneeling in front of sturgeon with her back against the wall and upon hearing my operative scream in horror and disgust shot upwards and got stuck inside like mr bean with a Christmas turkey then ran around aimlessly until he collapsed from the lack of air and the weight of a screaming Scotswoman. Apparently he died en route to emergency surgery. I'm not sure if this will provide comfort to his family but when they finally managed to remove his head it was red white and blue. A unionist to the end.

I heard that he passed away in his sleep.

Galted wrote:

ShahenshahG wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:When did Superfly die? Shame I missed it.

It's a shame we all missed it my operative in the Scottish Parliament assures me it was hilarious. He said he walked in on superfly kneeling in front of sturgeon with her back against the wall and upon hearing my operative scream in horror and disgust shot upwards and got stuck inside like mr bean with a Christmas turkey then ran around aimlessly until he collapsed from the lack of air and the weight of a screaming Scotswoman. Apparently he died en route to emergency surgery. I'm not sure if this will provide comfort to his family but when they finally managed to remove his head it was red white and blue. A unionist to the end.

I heard that he passed away in his sleep.

I think he was hoping for that but just couldn't get his head down

I'm not dead and I'm not a Unionist.  Those guys are c**ts.  To quote Ferris Bueller

"Isms in my opinion are not good. A person should not believe in an ism, he should believe in himself."

Not quite as good as my saying:

"The only good ism is jism"

Frak sake just can't get good help these days

Maybe he fell into the North Sea off his head on heroin.

Galted wrote:Maybe he fell into the North Sea off his head on heroin.

Or maybe on/in (e)

Filthy soda.
(anagram)

I hope nobody was Joe Lara.

Post holiday fist (no anagram).
Me no Tarzan.

Pal Joey wrote:Filthy soda.
(anagram)

I hope nobody was Joe Lara.

Sicond.

I had to look him up. By mistake I saw a picture of his wife, Christian weight loss advocate Gwen Shamblin (who also died). Scary.

JuliusHMarx wrote:Post holiday fist (no anagram).
Me no Tarzan.

Where Cheeta? Hasn't touched his banana this morning. Me worry.

lostinwales wrote:

Pal Joey wrote:Filthy soda.
(anagram)

I hope nobody was Joe Lara.

Sicond.

I had to look him up. By mistake I saw a picture of his wife, Christian weight loss advocate Gwen Shamblin (who also died). Scary.

Had a look at her, every photo looks like her head's been photoshopped together, badly .

Good morning all.

Hello Rick. Disgraceful that such a friendly greeting was allowed to become a near-michaelsing.

Thanks, mate, appreciate it. You well?

Keeping a Tino-like schedule with this CC. Now I’m gonna go cut down a tree. I’m such a bloody man.

Dolphin Ziggler wrote:Keeping a Tino-like schedule with this CC.

I wouldn't even have got one round completed yet.

rIck_dAgless wrote:Thanks, mate, appreciate it.  You well?

I am, thanks, how are things in the scorched north?

Congratulatory fist.

Unprefixed sicond.

Tawdry tird

It's like a Naomi Osaka press conference on here. Step lively lads, summer has arrived and I've got a massive beer order arriving at some point this week.

What's the delay, Supes?  Jimmy Brings Beer (here) can be delivered in 30 minutes.  

Had two awkward little episodes participating in my online CPD course this morning. About 80 of us were on there including the presenters. I'd say about 90% of us had our cameras turned off (I did too after a few minutes) which prompted one wise guy to accuse the majority of us (those with cameras switched off) as "not really being there" (towards the end of the presentation) and therefore we should not be entitled to the measly 1 CPD credit point. I was almost tempted to type "fvck off" but didn't. I usually keep a low profile during these things and just thank them at the end.

However the one that really upset the apple cart most was a little bit later on. This poor old bloke was presenting his product (landscape gardener) and casually mentioned: "..so when your bloke comes onsite to install it, just remember to get him to do this...." (good advice)

This young angry twerp (face visible on camera) took exception to the masculine presumption above and activated his voice so all could hear. Turns out he was extremely offended by these two words and branded the old guy a 'misogynistic, sexist, gender-denying, out-of-date' old white plank (or some-such) who was probably solely responsible for all of the social problems in the world today.

I thought it was quite funny really. It really broke the rhythm of the talk. A few others supported the young guy (via text box) whilst others told him to "calm down" and "take it easy".