The Culture Cup Round 6 - new but not really improved

by Mind the windows Tino. Mon 10 Mar - 12:50

First topic message reminder :

superflyweight wrote:It's in Edinburgh and it's called the "Pubic Triangle". Is about 5 minutes from my work and there's always a distressing smell of lube hanging over the area.

That's the one, thanks super.

Is lube really a distressing smell?

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 18 Mar - 9:03

I went off the show quite a while ago when it started being all about them, shame as i used to really enjoy it

by **ShahenshahG** Tue 18 Mar - 9:37

Alright lads, I think we've observed the respectful period and must now declare Tino dead. Lets replace him with a green petri dish so this thread can move on.

by **Galted** Tue 18 Mar - 9:39

ShahenshahG wrote:Alright lads, I think we've observed the respectful period and must now declare Tino dead. Lets replace him with a green petri dish so this thread can move on.

I'll second that. Perhaps Adam has a "dead" icon to use instead of "manager" as this still grates me.

by Rowley Tue 18 Mar - 9:41

Hard to disagree, he has gone, life moves on.

by **seanmichaels** Tue 18 Mar - 9:58

Before we get rid of him completely can we make sure his offer of a hot bath, clean clothes and some warm food is still on the table. Just in case....

by **ShahenshahG** Tue 18 Mar - 10:30

seanmichaels wrote:Before we get rid of him completely can we make sure his offer of a hot bath, clean clothes and some warm food is still on the table. Just in case....

You've just volunteered to ask his son.

....

Alas Poor Sean, I knew him well, He was a nobjockey, a racist, a sexist and strangely a homophobe and frequently discussed his excretions with large audiences but he was an alright sort of bloke. Let replace him with Lumbering Jack like for like except in likeability.

by **Pal Joey** Tue 18 Mar - 10:55

Arachnid Alert:

Had to duck down to the shops 15 mins ago. Quite a balmy, warm evening... full moon and all.

I parked the car right outside Woolies but just as I was checking the rear view mirror for traffic... this medium-sized huntsman runs down the windscreen in front of my face. For a moment I thought it was on the inside. It then ran along the roof heading towards the back windscreen.

Did the shop (no more than 10 mins) and returned to the car and (of course) no sign of my friend. I did a quick check of the road nearby... nothing.
I just have that feeling he went under the wheel well somewhere or hung onto the chassis for the trip back home.

The car is back where it was in the garage so hopefully he'll go back to his clan with the "adventure to the shops" story. Or maybe he'll spring a surprise on me again in the next few days?

by **JuliusHMarx** Tue 18 Mar - 10:58

That's incredible LB - you still have Woolworths?!!?

by **Pal Joey** Tue 18 Mar - 10:59

More incredible is that I found a parking spot right outside!

by **seanmichaels** Tue 18 Mar - 11:04

Woolworths in Oz is like a Tesco's if I remember correctly? Not the crappy joints that sold over priced sweets and paddling pools over here.

Never got the whole Hungry Jacks / Burger King thing out there. Same menu, same prices but different 'brands'?

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 18 Mar - 11:04

Julius wrote:That's incredible LB - you still have Woolworths?!!?

Different Woolworths Julius...

They have another version in NZ and Aus also

by **Pal Joey** Tue 18 Mar - 11:12

That's right sean and rick.

Woolworths (different to the US one without the 's' and your one) and Coles have a duopoly here (80% market share).

There are some small independent supermarkets but they are struggling to get a market share and simply get swallowed up or pushed out.

Those big two have also linked up with Caltex (Woolies) and BP (Coles). They also sell home and vehicle insurance policies. Killing it.

by Adam D Tue 18 Mar - 11:13

Could you guys have a look at the global Hall of Fame thread and see if you can help out.

Cheers

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 18 Mar - 11:17

Adam wrote:Could you guys have a look at the global Hall of Fame thread and see if you can help out

Will have a look when the list is released Adam

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 18 Mar - 11:22

LB wrote:Woolworths (different to the US one without the 's' and your one) and Coles have a duopoly here (80% market share)

South Africa has a different version again i believe...

They sell more than Random Photo frames, odd lamps and inexpensive Pick'n'Mix sweets.

Hence the more robust business model

by **Galted** Tue 18 Mar - 11:35

rick_dagless wrote:

South Africa has a different version again i believe...

They sell more than Random Photo frames, odd lamps and inexpensive Pick'n'Mix sweets.

I bought a pair of red flip-flops and an AK-47 at the Broad Acres Woolworths last November.

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 18 Mar - 11:40

Galted wrote:pair of red flip-flops

Was this before your search for appropriate laces bore fruit?

by **Galted** Tue 18 Mar - 11:46

rick_dagless wrote:
Galted wrote:pair of red flip-flops

Was this before your search for appropriate laces bore fruit?

This was in addition to the Hi-Tecs. When holidaying in a warm climate it's important to use footwear that allows the feet to breathe and thus stink out cars and aeroplanes.

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 18 Mar - 12:03

Galted wrote:This was in addition to the Hi-Tecs. When holidaying in a warm climate it's important to use footwear that allows the feet to breathe and thus stink out cars and aeroplanes.

With the appropriate socks I hope in order to cause massive consternation amogst fellow holiday goers for some reason

by **Pal Joey** Tue 18 Mar - 12:08

Anyone know a good barefoot accountant or lawyer?

by **seanmichaels** Tue 18 Mar - 12:27

Galted wrote:
rick_dagless wrote:

South Africa has a different version again i believe...

They sell more than Random Photo frames, odd lamps and inexpensive Pick'n'Mix sweets.

I bought a pair of red flip-flops and an AK-47 at the Broad Acres Woolworths last November.

Re military equipment / souvenirs, my mate has a 40m2 Nazi swastika flag. Worth a fortune apparently.

by **JuliusHMarx** Tue 18 Mar - 12:40

Linebreaker wrote:Anyone know a good barefoot accountant or lawyer?

No, only a barefoot contessa.

by Guest Tue 18 Mar - 12:55

seanmichaels wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:I might have to be in Hull on Friday and would appreciate any tips on dress and behaviour.
For example, should I wear a flat cap and drink my gravy straight from my plate or am I mixing up my counties? If I get into a tight spot, would I able to whip out a lighter and have the locals worship my mastery of fire?

If you're seriously going to Hull is there any possibilty you could take 10 bags of coal for me? I am in the process of buying 30 acres of land for redevelopment and the remaining 10 of 15 bags in total constitutes full and final settlement.

HULL TIPS.

Don't laugh at the locals when they refuse to put the "h" in "Hull". It's 'Ull.
Start talking to anyone in a shop and you run the risk of the conversation still being dragged on by the time you have to leave the city.
Dress code is "Man at Primark".
I would recommend the old town if you like a drink,old cobbled streets and that.
Don't sniff the air

by **Galted** Tue 18 Mar - 14:19

he began
this thread
we think he might be dead
Ti-noooo Ti-nooooo

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 18 Mar - 14:21

We thought he was breeding too quick
Turns out he was fatally sick
Ti-nooooo Ti-noooooo

by **ShahenshahG** Tue 18 Mar - 14:22

He was boasting about sex in spades
turns out galted gave him aids
Ti-noooo Ti-noooo

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 18 Mar - 14:23

He may be Bob Crow
Now we will never know
Ti-nooooo Ti-noooo

by **ShahenshahG** Tue 18 Mar - 14:26

Though his lip was split
his smile was wry
now he'll never sing another lullaby
Ti-nooooo Ti-noooo

by **Galted** Tue 18 Mar - 14:27

his name
is Shah
he goes too f*cking far
damn Shaaaah damn Shaaaah

by Rowley Tue 18 Mar - 14:29

Can we stop going on about him. I have moved on, it is time we all did likewise.

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 18 Mar - 14:29

You are in the denial phase Jeff...

by **ShahenshahG** Tue 18 Mar - 14:30

He groans,
He moans, he thinks his belly's toned
Rowley, Rowley

by **JuliusHMarx** Tue 18 Mar - 14:38

He's rick
He likes a sh@g
Alas, he has no dag
dag-less, dag-less.

by **Galted** Tue 18 Mar - 14:40

I found!
Rick's dag!
It was in a Tesco bag!
Dag-ful Dag-ful

by **Galted** Tue 18 Mar - 14:43

he loves
Aunt Bessie's
he hates us southern Jessies
Row-ley Row-ley

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 18 Mar - 14:46

Because of Julius and Galted
my dag search is now halted
Gated and Jules, galted and Jules

by **JuliusHMarx** Tue 18 Mar - 14:52

He has a gal
He has a ted
Yet he sleeps alone in bed
Gal-ted, gal-ted

by **Galted** Tue 18 Mar - 15:21

he's quite
well-bred
but cannot lock a thread
he's Jules he's Jules

by **JuliusHMarx** Tue 18 Mar - 15:49

Genuinely L*L'ing at these. And with Tino gone, I can write that without fear of reprisal!

by **superflyweight** Tue 18 Mar - 16:09

He's scared of benders
He shagged Sonia from Eastenders
It's seanmichaels, seanmichaels

by Rowley Tue 18 Mar - 16:18

He dresses like a tw*t
But at least he's not top hat
He's Galted, He's Galted.

by **ShahenshahG** Tue 18 Mar - 16:24

He loves gin without tonic
his nicknames' ironic
Superflyweight, Superflyweight

by **JuliusHMarx** Tue 18 Mar - 16:24

He's super
He's fly
I heard he kissed a guy
s-f-w, s-f-w

by **JuliusHMarx** Tue 18 Mar - 16:26

He founded
This site
He's totally full of sh1te
Adam D, Adam D

by **ShahenshahG** Tue 18 Mar - 16:31

He's angered
By strife
So he enslaved his wife
Rowley, Rowley.

by Guest Tue 18 Mar - 17:24

He's despised
By Us
He's as big as a bus
They call him TRUSS, they call him TRUSS

by **JuliusHMarx** Tue 18 Mar - 18:34

These chants haven't ceased
Not quite the number of the beast
667, 667

by **superflyweight** Tue 18 Mar - 19:34

He wears Jack Wolfskin
Because he's got no foreskin
He's Galted, he's Galted.

by **ShahenshahG** Wed 19 Mar - 1:24

superflyweight wrote:He wears Jack Wolfskin
Because he's got no foreskin
He's Galted, he's Galted.

Looks like someone is joining Tino soon.

by **Galted** Wed 19 Mar - 7:00

ShahenshahG wrote:
superflyweight wrote:He wears Jack Wolfskin
Because he's got no foreskin
He's Galted, he's Galted.

Looks like someone is joining Tino soon.

I think superfly's been watching me approaching people in parks.

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