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First topic message reminder :

It's a bit HOT down here.

10 siconds. l*l

Pal Joey wrote:10 siconds. l*l

The aforementioned Chief can down a pint in under 4 seconds. It may be the greatest physical achievement in human history.

It is my belief that Hobgoblin is ok.

https://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/food/northern-pubs-vegetarian-sharing-platter-just-chips-20230701237125

Galted wrote:https://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/food/northern-pubs-vegetarian-sharing-platter-just-chips-20230701237125

L*l out loud.

I've been a vegetarian for a few years now. I haven't told my friends and family though. No desire to visit such shame on them. The fact I live in the south is bad enough.

They'd rather I was a nonce than a veggie.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Galted wrote:https://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/food/northern-pubs-vegetarian-sharing-platter-just-chips-20230701237125

L*l out loud.

I've been a vegetarian for a few years now. I haven't told my friends and family though. No desire to visit such shame on them. The fact I live in the south is bad enough.

They'd rather I was a nonce than a veggie.

With Jeff also being a vegetarian and me enjoying a bit of salmon, that makes me the traditional hard man of the tea society (non-Scottish).

Fist.

I think you're forgetting riCk. He would fold you in half pal.

Have you seen Pee Jay's Tipping thread? I am nestled just underneath Superfly. Not a position I hope to ever find myself in real life.

Haven't seen the tipping thread.  I intend to join in every Ashes and then chicken out don't bother because I'm hard.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:I think you're forgetting riCk. He would fold you in half pal.

Have you seen Pee Jay's Tipping thread? I am nestled just underneath Superfly. Not a position I hope to ever find myself in real life.

I'm concerned about you coming up my rear.

superflyweight wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:I think you're forgetting riCk. He would fold you in half pal.

Have you seen Pee Jay's Tipping thread? I am nestled just underneath Superfly. Not a position I hope to ever find myself in real life.

I'm concerned about you coming up my rear.  

Who are you trying to kid.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:I think you're forgetting riCk. He would fold you in half pal.

Have you seen Pee Jay's Tipping thread? I am nestled just underneath Superfly. Not a position I hope to ever find myself in real life.

The three of us are comfortably mid table and ready to pounce for the final 3 matches. Consider yourself lucky, Tino... I've got Eirebilly above me.

It goes against the spirit of the tipping comp really but those are the rules I guess.

Pal Joey wrote:

It goes against the spirit of the tipping comp really but those are the rules I guess.

I'd urge you to consider withdrawing that post, Pee Jay.

That's what I would do in your position.

Galted wrote:Haven't seen the tipping thread.  I intend to join in every Ashes and then chicken out don't bother because I'm hard.

I send you invites every now and then but I don't expect you to bother responding. I know you are more than likely to have your hands full at the Greenwich Sandpit or trying to prise the cat's claws off your face. Even though you're ambidextrous that's still quite a handful. I understand.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Pal Joey wrote:

It goes against the spirit of the tipping comp really but those are the rules I guess.

I'd urge you to consider withdrawing that post, Pee Jay.

That's what I would do in your position.

You "might have" because you're half decent.

Not bad for a palindrome post...

Pal Joey wrote:

Galted wrote:Haven't seen the tipping thread.  I intend to join in every Ashes and then chicken out don't bother because I'm hard.

I send you invites every now and then but I don't expect you to bother responding. I know you are more than likely to have your hands full at the Greenwich Sandpit or trying to prise the cat's claws off your face. Even though you're ambidextrous that's still quite a handful. I understand.

Kind of you to understand but it's more to do with a fear of failure. It's bad enough that it's happened in real life, don't need it to happen in my virtual life as well.

Galted wrote:

Pal Joey wrote:

Galted wrote:Haven't seen the tipping thread.  I intend to join in every Ashes and then chicken out don't bother because I'm hard.

I send you invites every now and then but I don't expect you to bother responding. I know you are more than likely to have your hands full at the Greenwich Sandpit or trying to prise the cat's claws off your face. Even though you're ambidextrous that's still quite a handful. I understand.

Kind of you to understand but it's more to do with a fear of failure.  It's bad enough that it's happened in real life, don't need it to happen in my virtual life as well.

That's a great point, virtually speaking. I know exactly what you mean.

Afternoon, gentlefolk how goes it?

How is the "Stumping" going down, down under, peej?

rIck_dAgless wrote:Afternoon, gentlefolk how goes it?

How is the "Stumping" going down, down under, peej?

The opposite to how it's going down in England.

Funny, I was reading both Aus and UK newspapers and some of the comments. Carey's action seemed to have a polarising effect.

There was probably more talk in the media here about the MCC Members' behaviour in the Long Room. That gave some a chance to get stuck into the hypocrisy of the elite, racist, bigoted, sexist, self-serving, culturally insensitive, ignorant and shameless privileged rump of British High Society. Someone should make a film about it. Pretty sure it would break all box office records.

Sorry, I forgot to add ableist. Making poor Nathan Lyon walk down all those stairs like a cripple all the while laughing with drinks in their hands.

All in all, it was an entertaining test match I thought. What did you think, rIcK?

I wouldn't be surprised if the Too-Clever Snifflers fight back even harder at Headingley against the Spiritless Smart-Arses.

Yeah the MCC members come across as a bunch of entitled pricks, guaranteed nota word would've been said outside the protection of the long room.

It was a crazy old game, not often you are going to see Lords sound like an Auld Firm Derby match.

As much as it irritated at the time, I think the Ashes needs this kind of spite and needle, so overall I think it has probably worked out.

Plus if it sends Ben Stokes nuclear and get's Stuart Broad's sh1thousery up then should make for a fun old series.

Can't believe I've been suspended by the MCC. Everything I said was factually correct.

FACT!

RANT OVER.

JuliusHMarx wrote:Can't believe I've been suspended by the MCC. Everything I said was factually correct.

Don Bradman would be turning on his crease. Can't believe you said those things in front of his portrait. Actually, I got stared at by him at the SCG Members. Back in '93 at some celebrity 'All-Cheats' match. I pointed the finger at him and called him a cheat too. I remember it was a cold piercing gaze he gave me. Like I'd been sent into bat in the rain. But I stood my ground and stared back at him.

Sounds like the time I told W G Grace his bat was too wide.

JuliusHMarx wrote:Sounds like the time I told W G Grace his bat was too wide.

That was very brave of you to say that. I suppose the last straw was when you hid his beard balm in Lord Harris' kit bag. Or was that Duty?

Jules hid some beard balm in Duty?

Ergh.

I was once caught reading an MCC member's newspaper over his shoulder on the Jubilee Line. He tutted, give the paper a frightful snap and turned so that I couldn't read it.

C*nt.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:Jules hid some beard balm in Duty?

Ergh.

Might have been beard oil. I'm not sure. One of those purple hexagonal glass bottles I think. It took W G ages to find it. He was furious!
Then they couldn't find the glass bottle stopper even after a thorough search of both team's locker rooms. It went from bad to worse in no time.

Don't mean to boast, but I've been quoted by Guildford on the Ashes thread. My life is complete.

The same Guildford that my sources tell me is banned from any Dorothy Perkins in the country? That Guildford?

"Should a London property developer in the Lords long room really be questioning anyone's ethics?"

Probably my favourite take on the MCC members drama.

king_carlos wrote:"Should a London property developer in the Lords long room really be questioning anyone's ethics?"

Probably my favourite take on the MCC members drama.

He may work in London, but he probably lives in Ethics.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:The same Guildford that my sources tell me is banned from any Dorothy Perkins in the country? That Guildford?

Probably although I forget the reason.

Thanks for inviting me back or at least leaving a back window open.

Top cameo from GB and a michalesing to boot, solid work.

Fisy

Just goes to show. Don't f*ck up a fist.

I personally wouldn't touch a f*cked fist, but there you go.

Tird.

Fist. Not my greatest michaelsing.

Galted wrote:Fist.  Not my greatest michaelsing.

True. You put 'Tird' when you were sicond.

Sicond.

Henry the Fourth.

Did Surrey lose again?

Flagging fist.

Must have been outsiders there, Galts.

I've always imagined Guildford's home patch to be the epitome of the civil and charming English township. Thought you'd be more likely to have a latte accidentally spilt on your lap or getting slapped by a freshly baked baguette on the high street by mistake.

Then getting a handwritten apology letter together with a couple national opera gift vouchers personally delivered to your front door at 10 o'clock the following morning.

Oh wait... Surrey lost? Happens to the best of them I suppose.

I see you're now nestled just under me, Pee Jay. I'll be gentle with you.

I'm in the middle of a Pee Jay and Duty sandwich. I don't know whether to be terrified or excited. A mixture of both I suspect.

Who you all got for the dodgy BBC presenter?

Packham
Norton
Walliams
Edmonds

Definitely Attenborough.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:I see you're now nestled just under me, Pee Jay. I'll be gentle with you.

Is that 6 'places' 6 inches or 6 metres? If it's the former I'm hoping the cross-wind picks up.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:Definitely Attenborough.

Just mentioned that to a mate, we reckon it would be the first sign of the apocalypse, the start of the fall of society.

rIck_dAgless wrote:Who you all got for the dodgy BBC presenter?

Packham
Norton
Walliams
Edmonds

That would be my wishlist.

rIck_dAgless wrote:Who you all got for the dodgy BBC presenter?

Packham
Norton
Walliams
Edmonds

Careful, riCK, you might end up needing super to bail you out of trouble.

Fist.

Reckon we need a scandal to liven up this thread.

Sicond.
Would have thought those photos of Tino in his y-fronts would be scandal enough.